Life Happens
by klswhite
Summary: Let's take a trip back in time and check out an alternate reality. Shouldn't be too long.
1. Chapter 1

**Life Happens**

She watched him from across the crowded pub. He looked miserable. Surrounded by boisterous, laughing, happy people and he was a bit of a grump. Taking a last sip from her drink she wound her way through the room.

"I think it's against the law to be so miserable at your own leaving party."

Taking a deep sip of his drink he smiled at her, "Then it's good I'm surrounded by coppers. Perhaps one of them will arrest me and I won't have to leave."

"You know most people would be thrilled to be going to a beach paradise for two years."

Draining his drink, he motioned to the bartender for another. "Well I guess I'm not most people."

She touched his hand, "What if, rather than another drink, we go for a walk?"

"Are you suggesting we ditch out on my leaving party, Dr. Hobson?"

"With as much booze as is flowing, I don't think they will miss us. Unless you would rather stay here and act miserable?"

The bartender returned with his drink. He tossed it back easily, "Who says it's an act?"

Concern etched her face, "I'll throw in some chips."

The hint of a smile crossed his face, "You do drive a hard bargain Dr. Hobson."

She turned, walking toward the door, comfortable in the knowledge he would follow her. Outside she waited. He was unsteady on his feet. Faking cold, she took his arm to help steady him. Carefully she guided him to his favorite chip stand where they placed an order. They waited then walked to a bench along the edge of the river, chips in hand.

They ate in silence, Robbie devoured his and took the remainder of hers when offered. She watched him from the corner of her eye, he seemed slightly more steady. "Care to walk?"

"Do you mind if we just sit here for a few more minutes?"

"Not at all, Robbie. We can do whatever you like."

Silence settled over them once again. "I'm scared to leave." Her small hand covered his much larger one but she didn't speak. "What if everything changes…more than it already has?"

She shrugged, "It's going to change whether you are here or not."

"You think I should go."

Her voice was quiet but confident, "Yes, I do." When he didn't answer she continued, "You're lost, Robbie. Every corner of Oxford has a memory. You need some distance. Maybe then…"

"Maybe then what?"

"Maybe then you can find yourself." The hurt etched on his face was a knife to her heart. If she could take it all away she would. "I'll miss you."

"Care to come help me pack?"

She blinked, "You're not packed yet?"

He laughed, "The house is packed, everything boxed or sold."

"Where are you staying?"

"At a hotel. I only packed a few clothes and some photos. I'll buy what I need when I get there."

"I've a better idea. Why don't I drive you to your hotel and help you pack? Then you can come stay at mine." At his skeptical look she smiled, "I'll throw in a hot cooked breakfast and a ride to the airport."

He smiled, "You don't have to Laura."

Standing, she took his hand, "I know, I want to."

He stood, clasping her hand, "It seems you've made me an offer I can't refuse."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

True to his word, it hadn't taken them long to pack. The drive to her small cottage hadn't taken much longer. She opened the door, dropping her keys into a bowl by the door, "It's not much. But it is home." She pointed down the hallway, "Second door on the left. There's only the one bath."

He nodded then made his way to the bedroom. She watched him unsure of why she'd invited him. Her friend Ellen would say it was her need to fix everyone. Turning into her sitting room, she straightened while she waited for him to return.

She was folding a throw when his voice filled the room, "You wouldn't happen to have anything to drink would you?"

"Tea, milk, orange juice…"

"Something stronger?"

"Is that really wise?"

"Doesn't a condemned man get a last wish?"

"You're not condemned, Robbie."

"Exiled then? One last hurrah."

Rolling her eyes, she finally smiled, "Fine, a drink."

"Or two."

She passed him walking to the kitchen. Returning a few moments later with a bottle of wine and two glasses, "A bottle and not a drop more."

He took the bottle from her, "A bottle each?" Holding out the glasses, she shook her head as he poured. He put the bottle on her coffee table and took the glass she offered. They clinked glasses and he took a deep sip from the glass, "You have good taste Dr. Hobson."

"Are you ever going to call me Laura?"

Draining his glass he filled his again, "Are you going to open another bottle…Laura?"

She sat on her sofa, tucking her legs under her. "Why do we need another bottle, Robbie?"

He sat next to her, stretching his legs out, crossing them at the ankle. "Why not?"

"Because flying with a hangover isn't fun."

Drawing deeply from his glass he laughed, "I never have a hangover and with the quality of this wine I doubt I would if I could."

"She wouldn't want you to be like this."

Anger crossed his face, "How do you know what she'd want?"

"I met her, I knew her a bit. She'd want you to be happy, not like this."

"Well she's not here." He drained his glass again, filling it.

"What do you miss the most?"

"Everything."

"No, that's not true." He glared at her and she met it easily, "What do you miss the most?"

Moments ticked past, neither spoke. Finally, in a quiet voice, he responded, "Her touch. No one touches me now. And I don't mean sex, just a touch. When you touched my hand at the bar, it was the first time anyone had deliberately touched me in over a year."

Reaching across the empty space, she took his hand. "I didn't know, Robbie."

He turned his hand over in hers, lacing their fingers, "Neither did I, until you did it."

"I'm sorry." Looking down at their still linked hands, "Does this help or hurt?"

Taking a deep breath he let his head fall back onto the sofa, "It helps."

Silence filled the room Laura continued to drink from her glass while Robbie ignored his. His breaths evened out, she saw his glass begin to dip. She set her glass on the table then moved to take his. Their hands were still clasped together as she moved over him. She took his glass setting it on the table behind him.

Turning back to him, she reached past his shoulder, leaning in close. Her hair brushed his skin. He moaned, nuzzling into her. His free hand reached up to stroke her cheek. Laura froze, unsure what to do. Without thinking, she turned to him. Their lips brushed. She sighed as he pushed into her, his hand moved to her hair.

She opened her mouth, his tongue invading it instantly. She could taste the wine on his tongue. Wrapping her free arm around his neck, she sat in his lap. He pulled at her hair, breaking the kiss, attacking her neck as she pulled desperately at him.

She stood, pulling him with her, marching backwards. His lips never left her neck. His hands reached for her shirt, tugging it from her pants. At the door to her bedroom, she paused for a moment, wondering if this was a mistake. The look of raw need in his eyes, pushed any doubt from her mind. Never wavering from his gaze she lifted her shirt then discarded it.

He followed her into the small bedroom, unbuttoning his shirt as he stalked toward her. His eyes devoured her as she stripped. In a flash he closed the distance between them, pushing her back onto the bed. He stripped his trousers then joined her on the bed.

His hands traveled the length of her body, savoring the feel of her skin. It had been so long since he'd touched flesh. Greedily he kissed her skin, consumed her. Arching her back, she pushed up to him, giving into the sensation.

It was a furious coupling; one borne of need and want. It didn't last long and at the end of it they were both sated and exhausted. Robbie collapsed alongside her, breathing hard. Neither quite knew what to say. They lay side by side staring at the ceiling.

"Robbie?"

He sat up, pulling at covers, "I'm sorry, Dr. Hobson, Laura. This shouldn't have happened."

She pulled at him, "Robbie, don't. I haven't any regrets." He turned to her, doubt filling his eyes, "Stay, we don't have to do anything else. But let me hold you, provide some sense of comfort. I don't expect anything. You can leave in the morning and this will have just been a night of comfort between good friends."

She could see the indecision on his face. Moving slowly, she softly touched his face. An almost inaudible cry escaped her lips when he turned into her touch, his lips caressing the inside of her wrist. She pulled him to her, wrapping her arms around him. He melted into her touch letting her pull him into the bed. She wrapped her body around him, caressing him lightly as his breathing evened out and he fell into a deep, dreamless sleep. Only when she was certain he was asleep did she allow herself to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Somewhere in the night he pulled her to him. His lips found her neck, hands wandered her body. She responded in kind, welcoming him into her body. They moved together fluidly. There was nothing quick about this coupling.

Robbie moved inside her, driving her to the brink and then over the edge. She clung to him, whispering words of comfort as she felt his release. His weight on top of her a welcome comfort. As he nuzzled at her neck, she felt his tears then heard the words which made her heart stop, "I love you, Val."

She held in the strangled cry, instead pulling him tighter. He rolled to the side, pulling her with him, tucking her under his chin. Delicate kisses dotted her hair as he drifted back to sleep

Curled next to him, she didn't sleep again. When the first signs of light filtered through her blinds she extricated herself from his arms. In the shower, she cried as she washed away the vestiges of their love making.

Dressing quickly and quietly, she made her way to the kitchen. Knowing the lack of sleep would make it harder for her to control her emotions, she started a pot of coffee rather than tea. Perhaps the bitter edge of it would keep her calm. As she was taking the first bitter sip she heard the water from the shower start.

* * *

Robbie stared into the mirror, ashamed of what he'd done. It wasn't fair, he'd used her for release, pure and simple. The way she'd crept from the bed proved how awful his actions had been. She would rather leave her own bed than wake in his arms. He could smell her scent on him, it filled his senses arousing him again.

He stepped into the shower and turned the water to cold. The frigid water washed away her sent and his arousal.

* * *

As he opened the bathroom door, the smell of breakfast overwhelmed him. Even after what he'd done to her, she was still honoring her promise to him. He padded down the hallway to the kitchen. She seemed smaller than normal, as if somehow diminished by what they'd done, what he'd done to her.

She moved efficiently around the kitchen. He watched her, thinking under different circumstances this would be an intimate scene. One he would want to explore, perhaps repeat. She stretched, reached for something in an upper cabinet. Without hesitation, he entered the kitchen and reached over her.

He'd pressed her into the cabinet, his body pinning her. She looked up at him, her blue eyes filled with some emotion he couldn't place. Stepping back he handed her the bowl, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…"

"It's alright Robbie." She could see the confusion etched into his face, his body language. This was the last place he wanted to be. And here she was making breakfast, "Would you like some coffee?"

He nodded, "I can make my own. Just point me in the right direction." She nodded to a cupboard closest to him and he turned pulling out a large mug.

She watched him make his coffee. The mug he used which always felt overly large in her hands seem to fit his easily. He inhaled the scent of the coffee, his eyes closing as he took a sip. For the first time since he'd entered the kitchen he seemed to relax.

Turning back to the stove, she tended to their breakfast, "There's a small patio garden if you'd like to have breakfast out there."

"I'd like that. Is there anything I can do?"

She pointed to a small basket at the end of the counter, "Take that outside. This will be ready in a minute."

He noticed her cup was almost empty, "Would you like me to top you off?"

Looking over her shoulder she smiled and nodded, "That would be nice."

Lifting the basket and his own cup he nodded, "I'll be right back." He hurried off. On the patio he set a place for each of them while looking around. There was a carefully tended garden. Somehow, he was not surprised Laura Hobson would have a thriving garden. Returning to the kitchen, he watched her expertly slide several items onto two plates. Not wanting a repeat of earlier he cleared his throat, "If you'll hand me your cup, I'll refill it. Or if you prefer, I can carry those plates."

She handed him the cup, "Just a splash of cream, please."

He nodded, "I'll be out in a minute." She was seated when he joined her. Her food untouched, "You didn't have to wait for me."

"I didn't mind, just enjoying the morning air."

He sat across from her, handing her the cup. "Do you have breakfast out here often?"

Pointing at her plate, "Well not like this but, yes, as often as I can."

Motioning around the garden, "It seems you spend an awful lot of time out here. It's beautiful."

She stared at him for a moment, wondering why he was babbling about her garden. Realizing she hadn't responded to his compliment, she smiled. "It relaxes me. My friend Ellen would say it has something to do with needing to create life after dealing with so much death."

"And what do you think?"

She laughed and shrugged, "I'm not that deep. I just think it's pretty."

For the first time, they met eyes, "I do too."

They ate in silence. Laura finished first, leaving several uneaten items. She pushed her plate towards him. He looked at the extra slices of bacon then at her. She nodded, "Go on."

He took them and continued eating. She watched him as she sipped her coffee. She wondered the last time someone had cooked for him. Had it been Val? His words from the night before filtered through her mind causing her to inhale. She tried to push them away, "What time is your flight?"

"You don't have to take me to the airport."

"I know, Robbie. I want to. You should have a friendly face there."

Taking a deep breath he asked a question which had been running through his mind all morning. "Will there be a friendly face when I return?"

She reached across the table and took his hand, "If you want one, yes."

Turning his hand in hers, he relaxed. "I think I would."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

The ride to the airport was quiet. Neither had much to say. As they parked, he turned to her. "Laura, about last night…"

Staring straight ahead, afraid to meet his eye, she shook her head. "There's nothing to talk about. As I said, a night of comfort between old friends."

"I didn't plan…"

"I know Robbie, nor did I. It happened."

"I just don't want you to think…"

Anger flared in her, couldn't he see how much this was killing her, "Think what, Robbie? It was sex, between consenting adults. It's not like I expect an undying declaration of love…"

The words froze in her throat. He saw the look of panic on her face, suddenly his words from the night before filled his head. "Oh God, Laura, I'm so sorry."

She closed her eyes, tears finally falling. "There's no need, Robbie."

He reached for her, wiping the tears away, "I wish I could take it all back. I wish I had stayed in that pub drinking myself in a stupor."

Her eyes opened, "I don't." She held his hands when he tried to pull away. "You needed to know someone cares. If, for only a moment, you felt alive then it was all worth it."

"Why do you care for a grumpy old sod like me?"

"My friend Ellen would say it's because I have an overwhelming need to fix everything."

He laughed, "One day I'm going to have to meet this friend."

He opened the car door and got out. She followed suit joining him at the back of the vehicle. He took his bag from the back and closed the lift gate.

She reached out, taking his hand, threading their fingers together. At his look, she shrugged, "You're not so grumpy or old."

"Too old for you, you need to find someone your own age, someone whole who can give you the life you deserve."

"What about the life I want?"

He started walking, she matched his gait. "You'll find it."

They walked in silence. She stood back as he checked in for his flight and collected his boarding pass. When he returned to her, she took his hand again, "Promise me two things?"

"What's that Laura?"

"Get a handle on your drinking."

He nodded, "And the second thing?"

"Come home."

He found he didn't have any words. Lowering his head, he kissed her tenderly. He turned and walked away not daring to look back. Tears streamed down his face as he wondered if would be able to keep her promises.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

 **We fast forward 2 years to when Robbie returns. From this point forward, we are completely A/U. I will use bits and parts from some episodes but the rest is my flight of fancy. I hope you enjoy.**

He sat staring out the window as the plane circled the English countryside. It had been a long two years. He was in a better place than when he left but he still wasn't sure he was ready to return.

The first class flight attendant stopped at his seat, "Another orange juice before we land Mr. Lewis?"

He waved her off, "No, four is my limit."

She pointed at the flowers he had tucked beside him, "It's beautiful."

"It's for my wife."

"She's a lucky woman."

He smiled. She walked away and his thoughts turned to Val and then to Laura. They had traded a few letters his first year. Hers had always been long and chatty, telling him all of the news of the station and Oxford. Then the letters had become shorter, finally tapering off altogether. He'd sent her a note, letting her know he was coming home. Had hoped it would spur a return letter, the offer of a friendly face. No note had come. He didn't know if there would be a friendly face waiting for him or not.

As he cleared the secure area with the trolley carrying the few things he'd brought back with him, he saw a young man with a sign. The sign had a rather fanciful rendering of his name _Lewis_. There was something insolent about the young man, definitely not the friendly face he wanted to see. "Are you for me?"

"I am if you're Inspector Lewis, Oxfordshire Police?"

"Well I am, but I never ordered a taxi."

"Well you're in luck sir because I'm not one." Holding up his warrant card, "DS James Hathaway, Chief Superintendent Innocent sent me."

Nodding, "Very good of her."

Something unpleasant crossed James' face, "Yeah, shall we?"

He bent to pick up Robbie's luggage when a pretty young woman with an island accent touched Robbie's arm, "Mr. Lewis, you left them on board.

She handed him the beautiful orchids, "So I did. Thank you, thanks so much."

"No problem."

James looked at the flowers with disdain, "Orchids?"

Robbie bent over, tucking the flowers into his bag, "Yeah, they grow wild."

"How long were you on attachment sir?"

"Two years."

"Nice work if you can get it."

Yawning, Robbie covered his mouth, "Suppose so. Alright then, home James. I've always wanted to say that. But we need to make a quick detour."

James followed Robbie to the carpark, "Innocent wants to see you at 10. If that's alright?"

Robbie shook his head, already dreading the meeting with someone he didn't even know. Without realizing it he stepped into traffic. If not for James' quick action he would have been hit by a speeding car. As he looked up, he recognized the car, a red Jaguar, a car he would know anywhere. The driver, a young female, shook her head in disgust. He stared after the car as it drove away in haste. There definitely wasn't a friendly face so far.

* * *

She'd been anxious all day. Today was the day, he was finally coming home. It had been hard to get through her morning routine, only the fact she'd been through it so many times had kept her on track. She was caught between wanting desperately to see him and a growing nausea at the idea of seeing him.

The call out to the scene had been a blessing. Work would help push away all of her emotions. The science would calm her, steady her fragile nerves. As she lifted the heavy case, she laughed to herself wondering what Ellen would make of that. She would rather deal with a dead body than face Robbie Lewis.

She was walking to the scene when she saw him. He wasn't supposed to be here. Rumor on the grapevine was the new Chief Super wanted him gone. The only thing she could do was seem friendly. She'd promised him a friendly face if he promised to come home.

With a deep breath she crossed to him, "Ahhh, the wanderer returns."

"Hello doctor."

"Ohhhh, can you turn down the volume on that shirt?"

He smiled to himself. It was lovely to see her, finally a friendly face. "It's good to see you."

She nodded briskly, "You too." She turned to James, "Good morning Sergeant."

James smiled tightly, "Dr. Hobson."

As they walked Laura asked for the run down, "So what have we got?"

James tried to hand a package to Robbie, "Scene suit sir."

"I'll pass thanks."

Laura tried to help him. So many things had changed while he'd been gone, "They're all the rage these days. You'd better."

He looked at her, to gauge her seriousness. Her expression didn't change. Rolling his eyes, he reached out to James, "Give it here then."

James smiled, wondering what strange hold Dr. Hobson had over the Inspector. As they turned to head into the building Robbie took the case from Laura. For a brief moment, their fingers touched. A thrill ran through Robbie. She'd kept her promise. He'd finally found a friendly face.

* * *

She watched him walk away, talk about ripping off the band-aid. He'd looked good, relaxed, more than she'd seen him in years. The vestiges of sadness were still there. But somewhere, under it, she'd seen a glimmer of something.

He'd taken her case, their hands brushing for just a moment. All of those feelings resurfaced in an instant. Shaking her head, she pushed them away. She couldn't afford to let them back in. Hope was a terrible thing, the look in his eyes had given her hope but she knew she couldn't embrace it, there was too much at stake.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

She'd walked him through the report and the body was being wheeled away. There was something still bothering him, "You don't remember Morse getting involved with a juvenile case five years back?"

"Not unless there were bodies. Why?"

He shrugged, "Background. It's unusual, that's all. I was on me Inspector's course."

"Well I've sent the bullet off to forensics. But if you need something to go on, I'd say a 38."

He paused for a moment. Trying to determine if she seemed distant or if the fatigue was just pulling at him, "Timing?"

With her back to him, she took a deep breath. "Earliest 8, latest 10." Fixing a smile on her face, she turned back to him. "Best I can offer." She could see the fatigue as he rubbed his face, "You're more fed up than tired aren't you?"

"It's just why bother, you know. Innocent wants to put me out to grass. I might as well jack it all in tomorrow…"

"And you wouldn't know what to do with yourself." She smiled, hoping he wouldn't see her panic at the idea he might leave.

He smiled, sadly, "No."

An awkward stillness filled the room. It would be so easy to sweep in and comfort him. But she couldn't, not without knowing where things stood, "Are the Met making any progress on Val's death?"

The sadness flooded his face, giving her the answer she needed. He wondered briefly why she asked, "Hit and run, no witnesses. Fat chance after this time. Unless that bastard driver develops a conscious…" He paused, looking away. Before she could stop herself, she'd reached for him. Her hand caressing his shoulder. He looked down at her, surprised yet comforted by the touch of her hand, "We've got cracking shops in Oxford. Why'd she have to go to London?"

James opened the door. Laura quickly withdrew her hand as they both looked to the door. Robbie, mourning the loss of her touch growled, "I'm coming." He shook his head as he started to walk away, "It's all so different now." He stopped short of the door and turned back to her, "Your hair's shorter."

Her hand moved involuntarily to touch her hair, "I needed something easier to take care of, this is what I got."

"It suits you."

"Thanks."

"Any chance we could have dinner tonight?"

She shook her head, "No, I already have plans."

"Tomorrow?"

"Plans." At his stricken look, "I could do lunch one day this week though."

He smiled, "I'll take what I can get."

She watched him walk away, knew she should just let him go, "Robbie…" He turned back to her, a hopeful look on his face, "I'm glad you came home."

He smiled, "I'm glad you're glad."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

She sat at her desk, debating what to do. They had fallen into a comfortable routine. Lunch regularly, the occasional after work drink. She always made sure James was along as a chaperone to help her keep things at an arm's length.

Did she dare invite him to the party? Did she dare not invite him? There were only a few people from the MEs office invited but word would get around. If she didn't invite him and somehow he learned of the party would it ruin their tenuous friendship? If she did invite him would he think it meant more?

She debated calling Ellen then quickly discarded the idea. Ellen would encourage her to invite him. Ellen would encourage her to cancel the party and invite only Robbie Lewis. It was in this debate the perfect solution presented itself. She would invite him and tell him to bring someone. There was no way he could read more into that. Decision made, she set off in search of him.

* * *

It didn't take her long to find him, truth told they sort of found each other. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw him striding toward her in the hallway.

With a sarcastic smile he teased her, "What are you doing here, nobody's died?"

Two could play the teasing game, "I know, you'll be missing your targets." He laughed at her joke. She stepped closer to him, slightly closer than normal and smiled up at him. "No, this is a social call. I'm having a party." She paused looking around, "It's a special sort of birthday." At his quizzical look she explained, "Think of a number, then forget about it immediately."

He smiled teasingly and whispered, "Thank you."

Before she could stop herself, she touched him. She would have liked nothing more than to continue touching him but she was here for a purpose. Pulling her hand away she stepped away from him, "Oh, uh, if you'd like to bring anybody." A small part of her hoped he would say no but she wasn't sure if it was to the invitation or to the offer of bringing someone.

He paused, did she think there was someone else? Was that the reason she kept him at bay? Perhaps it was time for him to tell her, "I haven't really got anybody."

Her heart leapt at his response, there was her answer. Now she had a bigger problem, perhaps her normal solution would work, "You could always bring the dishy Sergeant Hathaway." She smiled casting a small glance up and down the length of him. Before she could remember any details of their night together she turned to leave. She held her breath until she was confident he was out of earshot.

* * *

He sat at his desk wondering about their conversation. She'd called James dishy. Perhaps she'd taken his words to heart, except rather than someone her own age she'd decided on someone younger.

A cup of tea entered his line of vision, "Earth to Inspector Lewis."

He looked up, "Thanks James. We've been invited to a party."

James sat at his desk, "Tell me it's not one of those things the Chief Super forces us to attend."

Taking a sip of his tea, he reclined in his chair propping his feet on his desk. "No, Dr. Hobson invited us to her birthday party."

"You mean she invited you and you just don't want to go alone."

"Nope, she was very clear that the dishy Sergeant Hathaway should come."

James smiled to himself, "Dishy? The lovely doctor thinks I'm dishy."

There was something in James' voice that made him uneasy, "Easy on, she's older than you."

Leaning into his desk, "How much older?"

Robbie sat up, "It's not worth my life to tell you that. So, you in?"

"Might as well, she'll probably have good booze."

Robbie remembered the only night he'd ever been to her home. A flush of warmth suffused his body, "As I recall, yes she does." He didn't see the odd look James gave him.

* * *

She'd seen him come in, James in tow. Since then, she'd carefully avoided him. When she felt his eyes on her she would laugh a bit harder at whomever she was talking to, make it seem she was having the time of her life.

Earlier in the day she'd briefly thought of cancelling, Ellen had talked her out of it. Had helped her prepare, calmed her nerves, ok supplied ample amounts of booze to steady her nerves. Now she was half in the bag and not having to pretend to enjoy her own party.

The singing started and she knew once the cake was cut it would be his cue to leave. Suddenly, she didn't want him to leave. Could she convince him to stay? Stay after all of the party guests had left. Perhaps she could offer to show him around her home, not the same one he'd been to that night.

Her friends approached with the cake and she fulfilled her duty, blowing them all out at once. Briefly she made a wish for a moment alone with him. When she opened her eyes, he was there, birthday wishes weren't supposed to work that way.

He watched her blow out the candles, her eyes closed, and wondered if she'd made a wish. Truth told, he'd watched her all night. She'd always been surrounded by people, the center of attention. Each time he'd tried to get near her she would disappear, just out of reach. As the people holding the cake pulled away, he seized the moment.

"Happy Birthday." He leaned in to kiss her check, inhaling her perfume. It was the same she'd worn that night. Memories flooded him for a moment. Her warm lips on his cheek a bitter reminder of what could have been.

She pulled away first, looking up at him. "Thanks, Robbie. I didn't think you'd turn up. Are you having a nice time?"

He nodded, not wanting to tell her he was miserable. If he'd known it was her birthday he would have much rather taken her somewhere they could be alone. But it was her birthday, "Yeah, considering…"

The combination of too much booze and too little food left her slightly insulted at his remarks, "Considering?"

He knew he'd upset her, "Well I'm out of practice with parties and such. And it's louder than expected."

Of course, he wouldn't enjoy a raucous atmosphere. Come to it, she didn't much like it either but a woman only celebrated so many special birthdays. "Well they were all medical students once upon a time." Raising her glass she smiled, "A couple of glasses of this stuff and they revert." She could sense he was looking to leave and she didn't want him to, "Hey do you play cards?"

Unsure at her question, "A bit of cribbage with me granddad years ago." She made a face, and he found himself explaining, "But just for matches."

Trying to contain her laughter at herself and her desperate attempt to keep him longer, she pointed in the direction of one of the other rooms, "Some of the guys are organizing a late night poker session." He looked away and she added, "Probably not for matches."

He laughed at her mirth and excitement, thinking how lovely she was. "Not my scene." He felt a sense of loss, had she wanted him to stay and thought she needed an excuse to keep him here.

"Where's James?"

"I have no idea."

They stared at one another as they both drank deeply from their champagne flutes. She gave him an odd look then switched hands. Before he knew what was happening she was caressing his face. Her hand cupped his cheek. He was just about to cover her hand with his, to hell with all of the onlookers, when he felt her thumb rubbing across his cheek. He closed his eyes, she wasn't touching him; she was cleaning him up.

He tried to hide his disappointment as their eyes met. Her thumb stopped its movement. Something he couldn't quite place ran across her face. What would she do if he just pulled her to him and kissed her? Would she kick all of these people out?

"Laura, it's time for cake."

She smiled sadly, tilting her head toward the sound. He nodded his understanding, "Go on, it's your party."

Pulling her hand away, she stepped away from him. "Don't leave without saying goodbye, OK?"

"Sure." He watched her walk away briefly wondering if he'd missed a moment.

* * *

James wandered around her house, trying to stay away from the party or perhaps the people at the party. He probably wasn't supposed to be upstairs but it was quieter. He wondered about the lovely doctor. The downstairs of her house was almost sterile. There were blank spaces, as if she'd removed traces of her life from where the party was being held.

It had made him curious and led to his wandering almost as much as the drunken revelers. Most of the doors were closed. A small niggle of guilt tugged at his conscience as he opened a door, an extra bedroom, tastefully decorated.

He pulled the door closed and moved onto the next door, a rather large bathroom. There was a towel hung over the rack, it looked recently used. There was a small toothbrush in a cup on the sink. There were two more doors on the hall. He crossed to the one at the end of the hall and opened it.

Dr. Hobson's bedroom, neat and tidy as he'd suspected it would be. He could see the door to an en suite and knew the towel and toothbrush weren't hers. His eyes raked the room, taking in all of the photos, some he knew normally held places of honor elsewhere in the house.

Closing the door, he turned to the last door. The niggle of guilt tugged a little more firmly at his conscience. He ignored it, turning the knob and pushing the door open. It was a little boy's room. Walls painted blue, race car bed, containers filled with toys. He took a step inside, closing the door behind him.

His eye was drawn to a picture on the bedside table. An almost three year old boy, wrapped in the arms of Laura Hobson. The resemblance was uncanny, her smile, her delicate features, her blonde hair. The eyes were also familiar. A crisp, clear blue, almost but not quite like his mother's.

Suddenly his guilt overwhelmed him, this was knowledge he shouldn't have. He stumbled from the room, staggering down the stairs. He grabbed a bottle of champagne and headed outside. Hopefully the air or the booze would push the knowledge from his mind.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

 **Another time jump, we resume our story during Quality of Mercy. Things between Laura and Robbie are status quo. James has kept the information he knows secret.**

It was late, the knock at the door startled her. She looked through a side window, shocked to see it was Robbie. He was listing, leaning heavily against the doorframe. It didn't take her long to realize he was drunk. She hadn't seen him drunk since he'd returned. A quick glance up the stairs and with a silent prayer she opened the door. Her body blocked the entrance.

"Dr. Hobson, no chance you have some of that excellent wine around do you?"

"No Robbie, I don't have any wine."

"Laura, come on, just a wee nip."

She looked past him, "Did you drive here?"

He shook his head, "I walked, figured you'd let me crash."

"I don't think that's wise, Robbie. Wait here, I'll call you a taxi."

"You're not even going to ask me in."

Glancing over her shoulder, thinking she'd heard a noise. "No, I'm not." She turned back to him, pointing at a bench, "Have a seat. I'll be back with some coffee."

She closed the door, locking it deliberately. Quickly finding her mobile she thumbed through her contacts finding James' number. Pausing for a moment, she took a deep breath and connected the call.

After three rings, a sleep heavy voice answered, "Dr. Hobson?"

"Sergeant Hathaway, I hate to bother you this late but I have a situation."

Voice suddenly clear of all sleep, "Are you OK?"

"I'm fine. Robbie, Inspector Lewis, showed up on my doorstep. He's rather worse for the wear."

"How did he get to your place?"

"Walked apparently." She paused, "I'm not in a position to bring him home and for…reasons, I don't want him to spend the night. I also don't want to put him in a taxi. Would you consider…"

Already up and dressing, "Acting as a taxi service?"

"Please?"

"I'm on my way."

She started the kettle taking a deep breath trying to settle her rapidly beating heart. Climbing the stairs she stopped at the first door on the left. Opening it quietly, she peeked around the corner breathing a deep sigh of relief.

His covers were in a pile on the floor, arms were stretched above his head. Smiling she crept into the room lifting the duvet and placing it gently over him. She kissed his forehead tenderly, smoothing back the soft curls. Making sure the covers were tucked in she backed out of the room, her eyes never leaving his sleeping form.

She made it to the kitchen just as the kettle started to whistle. Moving efficiently, she made a cup of tea. Then moved to the door. Opening it she stepped outside, closing it behind her. "I brought you tea instead of coffee. James is on his way to take you home."

Turning she found him asleep on the bench, leaning against the house. A small smile turned up the corners of her lips. She wished she could have let him in, let him sleep it off but if she did, all of her secrets would be revealed. He wasn't ready, knowing now would hurt him more, delay what she hoped they were building. Leaning over she tenderly pushed back the lock of hair which had fallen over his forehead. Tears filled her eyes as she realized how many times she had done the same for the little boy sleeping just up the stairs.

Lights flashing at the end of the drive drew her attention. She stood, putting distance between her and Robbie. The lanky frame of James Hathaway appeared.

"Thank you, Sergeant."

He smiled down at her, "It's James."

"Thank you, James." Nodding toward his sleeping form she smiled at James, "I can help get him to your car if you want." She lifted the tea, "I can transfer this to a travel cup. Perhaps he can drink it in the car."

James shook his head, "No, I've got black coffee in the car. Why don't you go on inside? I'll rouse him enough to get him walking."

She nodded and moved to the door, "What brought this on?"

James shook his head, "Celebrating, mourning. I'm not really sure which."

She raised an eyebrow, "Celebrating?"

"Did he not tell you?"

Taking a step toward him, her anxiety rising, "Tell me what, James?"

Scratching over his left eyebrow, he ducked his head. "I found the man who killed his wife."

All of the air left her lungs, the ground started to tilt. The mug fell from her hands crashing to the ground. She would have hit the ground herself had James not caught her. Without thinking, he lifted her, opened the door to her house and carried her into her own sitting room.

Placing her gently on the sofa, he knelt before her, "Dr. Hobson? Dr. Hobson, are you alright?"

Tears filled her eyes, "Why didn't he tell me?"

"My guess is that's why he came here, to tell you."

A noise at the top of the stairs startled her, she pushed at James standing in the same motion. "You have to go. Get him home, go."

"Dr. Hobson, I already know about your son."

She stopped pushing him, panic filling her eyes, "How? Who?"

Holding up his hands, he took a few steps back, "At your birthday party." He looked down, ashamed of his actions, "I was snooping, saw the photos in your bedroom. I won't ask…"

"I wasn't planning on telling you."

"Does he know?"

Her hands started to shake as she glared up at him. She expected condemnation, instead found sympathy and concern, "No, are you going to tell him?"

He shook his head, "No, it's not my secret to reveal."

"Mummy."

Laura moved to the stairs automatically, "I'll be right there Matty."

"Can I have some water mummy?"

"Yes, love, go on back to bed and I will bring you some."

"Do you have company?"

She looked back at James, "Just a friend from work. He needed to pick up something from mummy."

"Can I meet him?"

"Not tonight Matty. It's too late for little boys to have visitors."

"Perhaps he can go to the park with us in the morning."

"Perhaps, but not if you don't get back into bed."

"Yes mummy, good night mummy's friend."

She waited until she felt confident he was back in his room, "You need to go."

James turned to the door. With his hand on the handle he paused, "You need to tell him. Something tells me he could use the good news."

"I'm not altogether sure he will think it's such good news."

"Maybe not before, but who knows…"

"He was drunk tonight James. To my knowledge he hasn't been like that since he returned. That's not a man who needs a child in his life. And my child doesn't need someone who gets drunk like that in his life."

"I've only known him to get like that one other time. And, honestly, I was never sure if he was drunk or just dead tired. Every other time, he limits himself to two, maybe three drinks. I think finding the man who murdered your wife after all of this time buys a man a free night getting drunk."

"Perhaps, but I think I have a bit more experience with Robbie Lewis and drinking than you do Sergeant."

He nodded, acknowledging her history with the Inspector. Turning to meet her eyes he smiled sadly, "Perhaps he's a different person than the one you knew. Maybe it's time to get to know the new and improved Robbie Lewis." Looking toward the stairs, "It seems you have a very good reason for doing so."

His words echoed in her mind, there was truth in what he said. Robbie had changed. "I'll ask him to dinner next week."

"Why not tomorrow?"

"The nanny is off for the weekend. I don't have anyone to keep him. And I am pretty sure this conversation shouldn't happen with Matty around."

James groaned to himself, unable to believe the words he was about to utter, "I could watch him for a bit. He could meet mummy's friend from work."

Laura laughed, "James, no offense, but you don't strike me like a kid person."

"I'm not normally. But something tells me any child of yours is going to be quite extraordinary. Perhaps I can teach him chess."

"He's not quite four, James. More like Candyland and be warned, he cheats." She paused, "Would you really do this?"

Looking through the window to the still sleeping form of Robbie, he nodded, "For him, I would do anything."

"Why don't you come round for breakfast? We'll see how it goes."


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

At precisely 9 AM, James knocked on her door. She took a deep breath, opened the door and let him in, "Are you sure about this James?"

He nodded, "I told you, anything for Inspector Lewis. He needs this, you need this and I suspect your son does too."

Unable to argue with him she motioned for him to follow her into the sitting room. An older version of the little boy he'd seen in the photo the prior year was curled on the sofa watching television.

"Matty, we have company."

He looked up from his program, "Is it someone I know mummy?"

"No, but you did ask if you could meet him last night when you got up for water."

"Your friend from work?"

Stepping to the side so James could fully enter the room, "Yes, his name is James and he asked if he could go to the park with you today."

Matty stood and walked to James. Openly staring at him, he walked all around him as if trying to figure out what species he was. Once back in front of James he looked up at him, "You're very tall."

James suppressed a smile, apparently the little boy had inherited his mother's directness, "Yes, I am."

"My mum isn't very tall. She says I will outgrow her before too long."

"Most likely but she's probably safe for a few years."

"What do you do, James?"

"I'm a police officer. I work with your mother."

His eyes widened, "Have you caught lots of bad guys?"

"A fair few."

"Did they go to jail?"

James looked at Laura, unsure how much he should tell the little boy. She simply smiled so he answered as benignly as he could, "Yes, they did."

"Did my mummy help you?"

James smiled, "Yes, often she does. She's quite the super hero, your mummy."

Matty rolled his eyes, another trait he'd clearly learned from his mother, "She's not a super hero, she doesn't have a cape."

James laughed, a light clear sound. Laura was taken aback, she'd never heard James laugh. "Who's hungry?"

Matty started jumping around, "Me, me, me. James this is your lucky day. Mummy always makes pancakes on Saturday. Mummy makes the best pancakes ever." He took James' hand and led him to the small dining room, "Nanny tries to make them but hers are really bad."

James looked down at the small hand in his and was stunned. The little boy was quite spectacular. "I love pancakes. Does your mummy make them into shapes?"

He turned back to James, "How did you know?"

Smiling at Laura, he laughed again, "The best mum's do."

* * *

They'd eaten breakfast and Matty had been sent off to brush his teeth and dress. Laura was finishing cleaning the kitchen, James was drying the dishes. "He's magnificent Laura."

"Thank you, James."

"How have you done it by yourself?"

She shrugged, "Life happens, James. You adapt. I'm fortunate, I can afford help. My brother lives relatively close so he helps when I need it."

"I could help if you need it."

"James, you don't have to…"

Folding the towel, he met her eye, "I know, I want to. I don't have any family left. You, Inspector Lewis and if you'll let me, Matty, are all I have."

Touched by his sentiment, she gently touched his arm, "Let's see how things go with Robbie before you commit to that."

Covering her hand with his, "No matter how it goes."

She smiled at him, surprised by his emotion. She'd always thought him a bit of an odd duck. It was nice realizing he had a caring side. Matty came thundering down the stairs, "Time for the park. Let's go."

He tackled Laura around the legs. Her smile brightened as she bent to wrap him in her arms, "Matty, how do you feel about James taking you to the park?"

"With you?"

"If you want, but mummy has an errand she needs to run. If you went to the park with James I could do it and then we have all afternoon free."

He thought for a moment. He leaned over to whisper in her ear, "Do you think he knows what to do at the park?"

Laura hid her smile as she mock whispered back to him, "I guess we could ask him." She turned and they both looked up at James, "James, do you know what to do at the park?"

James pretended to think about the question, "Well it has been a long time since I've been to a park but I seem to remember something about swings and slides. Personally, I always liked climbing up the slides more than sliding down them."

Matty's eyes lit up, "I do too but mummy never lets me. She's not tall enough to watch me all the way to the top."

James knelt beside him and whispered in his ear, loud enough for Laura to hear and object if she wanted to. "I am quite tall, perhaps I could help you. But I might need some instruction. Do you think you could help me?"

"Do you follow directions well?"

"I'm a police officer, I always follow directions."

Matty turned to Laura, "He'll do."

Uncertainty clouded her face, "Are you sure?"

Matty wrapped his arms around her neck, sensing her unease, "I'm sure, mummy. But maybe tomorrow you could take me to the park, just in case he doesn't do it right?"

Closing her eyes, she inhaled his scent, tears filling her eyes. "You've got a deal. I love you Matty."

"I love you, mummy, to infinity and beyond."

James stood, turning away from the family moment. He wouldn't have believed the tough as nails Laura Hobson would be quite so maternal. He heard her sending Matty to get his jacket on and turned back to her.

She walked into the kitchen and opened a drawer. Withdrawing a key ring she turned to James, "This is the key for the kitchen door. We usually stay at the park for about an hour. Then we walk back and play in the garden some more. I should be back before his lunch but if not, he's happy with a sandwich and some carrot slices. Typically he takes a nap after lunch." She waved her hands, "I will be back long before then…"

"Laura, we'll be fine. Go."

She nodded and walked to the door where Matty was bouncing up and down, "I'll be back in a little while Matty. You be nice to James."

"I'm always nice mummy. Don't worry about us." She kissed his head, waved to James and walked out of her house.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

She'd been sitting in her car for ten minutes. Fear gripped her. She'd made her decision to keep Matty a secret thinking it was the best for all of them. Robbie had been a broken mess when he left and his letters hadn't made it seem he was much better.

Her plan had always been to tell him. But the longer she'd kept the secret the harder it had become to tell him. James was right, he needed to know. Opening the door to her car, she stepped out and made the short walk to his front door.

She was just about to knock when the door opened, "Robbie."

"Laura, what are you doing here?"

She smiled, trying to act nonchalant, "I came to check on you."

He looked at her quizzically, "Why are you checking on me?"

"You were a little worse for wear when I saw you last night?"

"You saw me last night?"

Concern shot through her, he didn't remember coming to her home. "You showed up on my doorstep last night. You wanted a drink."

He looked away, ashamed of his actions. "That really happened? I thought I dreamt it. When I woke up in my own bed I was sure it was just a dream." Seeing the concern on her face he reached for her, surprised when she stepped away. "Nothing happened did it?" Anger flooded through her, why did he seem so relieved? "I'm sorry, Laura I didn't say that right. I didn't do anything to you did I?"

Relief flooded through her, "No, you passed out on the bench outside my kitchen door. I called James and he brought you home."

He lowered his head, trying to catch her eye, "Laura, if I did something, please tell me."

She shook her head, "No, you knocked on my door and asked for some wine. I told you I would call you a taxi and before I came back you were asleep on the bench."

"Why didn't you invite me in?"

Biting on her lip, she shook her head, "I didn't think it was wise."

He flashed to the last time he'd been drunk in her home. Clearly she wasn't interested in a repeat performance, now he felt even more foolish. "I don't know what to say, Laura. I shouldn't have…"

She could see his distress and pushed on him, "Perhaps we shouldn't have this conversation here, where all of your neighbors can see."

"Do you want to come in? Or if you aren't comfortable being alone with me we could take a walk?"

She pushed him through the door and closed it behind her before his words fully registered. "What do you mean not comfortable being alone with you?"

Taking a step back, trying to give her some space, "You said it wouldn't have been wise to invite me in. Are you afraid of me?"

"Are you still drunk?"

"No?"

"Hungover?"

"I told you once, I don't get hangovers."

She rolled her eyes, "Then why would you think I am afraid of you?"

"Why else wouldn't you invite me in?"

Laura took a deep breath, wondering exactly when this conversation had gone off the rails. "Could I have some tea? We need to talk and I need something to calm my nerves."

He motioned her through to a small sitting room, "I'll make it. Make yourself comfortable."

She paced the floor of the small room. This wasn't going how she'd planned, oh who was she kidding. How exactly did one plan to tell a man who was, in essence, a one-night stand that he had a child you hadn't told him about? There wasn't a plan for these situations.

"You ordered some tea miss?"

She turned to him smiling, "James told me about finding Val's killer." Robbie almost dropped the tray. She rushed to help steady him. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have just blurted that out."

He smiled down at her, "It's ok. It seems we are a mass of misunderstandings and awkwardness this morning." He set the tea tray on his coffee table then sat, patting the sofa for her to join him. "Is that why you really came by?"

She nodded, "Like I said, to check on you."

"Last night is the first time since the first night I returned from attachment I've gotten drunk." He paused checking to see if she believed him, "As I sat in the pub in my drunken haze, there was only one person I wanted to share the news with. You."

"I didn't know."

He poured tea for both of them, "I didn't think you might remember all of those other times I showed up drunk." Handing her the mug, he smiled, "When I woke up in my own bed this morning, I was thrilled. I was certain it was just a bad dream. I was going to call you later today to see if you might like to have dinner, with just me."

She swallowed, "Dinner?"

"You know, like a date. One where I pick you up at your door, we go to a fancy restaurant, order a ridiculously expensive dinner then end up at chip stand because we are still hungry."

She took a sip from the cup, burning her tongue, "A date?"

"Unless you would be opposed to the idea?"

She shook her head as she set the cup on the tray, "Before I give you my answer, I need to tell you why I didn't let you in last night."

"You said it wasn't because I scared you." He stopped speaking, sudden comprehension dawning, "You had someone there? You're dating someone else?"

"No, that's not true. Well it's true, but not in the way you're thinking."

"I don't understand, Laura."

"I have a son. He was asleep in his bed."

He stood, "A son, when?"

"June 2005 . His name is Matthew, but much like his father he prefers a shortened version. Matty, I call him Matty.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Robbie blinked, doing the math in his head, "Is he…" She nodded, afraid to speak. "Why didn't you ever tell me? All of your letters, you never said a thing. Is that why you stopped writing me?"

"Your letters were disjointed a mixture of mourning and anger. I could tell in them you were still drinking. I thought knowing you had a child might make it worse. That you might feel guiltier. I was afraid."

He stood, pacing the room. She watched him as he stalked back and forth. "Can I see him?"

She closed her eyes, sadness enveloped her. "I don't know, Robbie."

"Damn it, Laura. I'm his father, I have rights."

"I'm aware of that, Robbie. But he's just a little boy. What happens when you decide to push us away? When the guilt kicks in and you decide you can't do this, can't betray Val or your other children. What happens to Matty or me when that happens?"

"I wouldn't do that Laura. Not to my child."

"Wouldn't you? I watched what you did to Patrick after Val died. He was an adult and he didn't understand. How is a little boy supposed to understand?"

He dropped into the chair closest to him, "Is that how you see me?"

She moved to kneel in front of him, taking his hands. "Robbie, I know what you are capable of but I also saw what you became after Val died. I saw the toll it took on your kids. My job is to protect Matty."

He looked down at her hands covering his, "So I never get to meet my son? I just get to know he exists but don't get to know him." He pulled his hands from her, recoiling from her touch. "I wish you hadn't told me."

Sitting back on her legs, letting Robbie have his space. "I want you to be a part of his life. But I need to know you are in his life, permanently."

"How do I prove that to you?"

"Why did you ask me on a date?"

He shook his head, "I don't understand…"

"You've been back for over three years, why are you asking me out now?"

He nodded, finally understanding. "Because I'm free. I woke up this morning and for the first time since she died, my first thought wasn't of Val. It was about the future and when I thought about the future, I thought about you."

Tears filled her eyes, it was the answer she needed to hear. "Then, yes, I will go on a date with you." She paused, suddenly unsure. "That is if you want to go on a date with me."

"So we go on a date and then I get to meet him?"

"No." His pained expression tore at her heart, "Not yet, at least, let's see where we go. Keep us separate from him. If we don't work out, then at least he never has to know that pain."

"You know me Laura, do you really think I would ask you out if I weren't committed to us?"

She smiled, "I know you wouldn't. But we are both different people than we were when you left. Maybe it's time we get to know each other all over again."

"I don't have a say in this do I."

She pulled away from him, retreating to the sofa. "Of course you have a choice. We could forgo a relationship beyond co-parenting and then we could plan how to introduce you to Matty. But I can't do both until I am comfortable with where we are going."

"I have to choose between us or my son."

"No, it's not choosing Robbie. If we take our time, we can have both."

He scrubbed his hand over his face, "What if I don't want both?"

A strangled gasp escaped her, "I see." She stood, "I have to go. I have a sitter watching Matty. Call me this week, we can talk about how to introduce you to Matty."

She was across the room before he could stand. By the time he started to follow her she was out the door. He chased after her, "Laura, I didn't mean…"

She was backing out of the parking spot, not hearing a word he said. He watched as she turned into traffic and quickly sped away. Why had he said what he did? He hadn't meant it. Perhaps she was right. He wasn't good for either of them. He should just leave them alone, they were better off without him.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

 **You get two chapters today because I am traveling for the remainder of today and tomorrow will be somewhat chaotic.**

She drove, mindlessly, tears streaming down her face. He didn't want her or he didn't want Matty, it didn't matter which. Everything she'd feared since they day the stick had turned blue coalesced within her. She remembered the day she realized she was pregnant like it was yesterday.

It had been two months after he'd left. A colleague had walked into the break room with a curry. The smell had hit her and what felt like everything she'd eaten in her life projectiled from her body. The same colleague made a joke about how his wife couldn't stand the smell of curry with her first pregnancy.

She'd laughed as her mind spun out of control. Peeing on the stick hadn't really been necessary, she'd known. Stopping at the pharmacy on the way home, she'd bought 3 different kits. Waiting for the results, she'd opened a letter from him. It had been a disjointed mess, rambling and unconnected. It was in that moment she'd made the decision not to tell him.

It had never crossed her mind to terminate the pregnancy. As the line on each test turned blue in rapid succession, she'd fallen in love. Despite the aversion to curry, the pregnancy had been easy. Her colleagues supportive and understanding when she just got on with her life.

Jean Innocent had mostly cleaned house when she took over the station so there were only a few people on the police force who even knew she had a child. As for the people in the medical examiner's office, they knew how fiercely she guarded her private life so they never mentioned Matty.

No one ever knew they were involved in her deepest, darkest secret. No one, until James, had ever suspected Robbie was the father. They all assumed it was a relationship which had failed and Matty was the parting gift. And she had fostered that belief, to keep Matty safe, to protect Robbie until she was ready to reveal everything.

She'd known he would be angry, hurt even. But it had never occurred to her he would reject them. She'd not planned on using Matty as a pawn to force a relationship with Robbie. Their burgeoning feelings existed, long before that night, even more so of late. He'd shown up on her doorstep, she was the one he turned to.

She simply wanted to know where they could go, independent of Matty. If things didn't work out, then Matty would never know that heartbreak. Her heart stopped as the full impact of the heartbreak hit her. She steered her car to the side of the road, opened the door and emptied the contents of her stomach. Until he'd said those words, she hadn't realized how much she wanted this, him, them.

She found a tissue and wiped her mouth, sitting in her car letting the tears stream down her face. Dragging deep breaths of air into her lungs, she struggled to calm herself. Matty was all that mattered. If Robbie called her, she would honor her promise. He could get to know his son, she would suppress her feelings, push everything aside so Matty could be happy.

* * *

Pulling into her driveway, she realized it was later than she'd planned. Matty would be asleep, no doubt tired from his time at the park. She checked the mirror, made a few adjustments to her makeup then got out of her car.

She let herself in and was greeted by silence. Walking quietly, she had to stifle a gasp of surprise when she found James asleep on her sofa with Matty sprawled across him. Tears welled in her eyes, it should be Robbie there, holding his son.

She turned from the room, the swell of emotion too much for her to process. Stepping into her garden, she closed the door behind her and let the anguished cry escape her. Deep heaving sobs overtook her, she fell to her knees, finally allowing herself to mourn a relationship which had only ever existed one night in her bed and for years in her imagination.

A gentle hand on her shoulder startled her. She turned, wiping her face. James was knelt down on the ground behind her. His face a mask of concern, "Don't worry, he's still asleep. I took him to his room."

She nodded gratefully, sinking in on herself. As James pulled her to him, she didn't fight him, instead she melted into him, comforted by his warmth. He held her as the tears flowed. No words were spoken, just an unspoken comfort between two broken people.

James sensed when she had cried herself out. He reached into his pocket and removed an old-fashioned cloth handkerchief and held it in front of her. She stared at it, again marveling at the incongruity of James. "I promise; it's clean Dr. Hobson."

She took it, dabbing at her eyes, "Call me Laura, please. I'm tired of being Dr. Hobson."

"Laura." Her sigh pulled at him. He placed a gentle kiss against the top of her hair, "Can I assume things did not go well?"

He felt her shake and cursed himself for causing her to cry again. The shaking worsened, continuing silently until finally a deep peal of laughter escaped her, echoing around the small garden. "You really are the king of understatement James."

He laughed, relaxing into her, pulling her tighter to him. "Sometimes the obvious must be stated." She rested her head against his chest, smiling at the honesty of his words. "I'm sorry, Laura."

She shook her head, melting into him. "Nothing to be sorry for James. It's senseless to get upset over something which never was. I simply have to focus on what is."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Pulling away, she stood offering him a hand, "No, James. I don't. Talking won't make it better."

"What will you do?"

"Move on, at least I know where things stand."

"And Matty?"

She shrugged, "I told him to call me. I promised I would introduce him to Matty."

He looked back to the house, his eye finding Matty's window, "I'll make sure he calls."

She grabbed his arm, turning him to her, "No, don't you dare. If he calls, it has to be his choice. I won't have Matty be an obligation someone has to remind him of."

James struggled with her words but finally nodded his understanding. Covering her hand with his he squeezed it, "My offer of help still stands."

She smiled, small and sad, but still a smile, "So you two got on well?"

"Yes, and you are right, he does cheat at Candyland."

"How many times did he beat you?"

James laughed, "Not once, I cheated right back."

Her laughter was clear and crisp, it seemed to wash away her earlier breakdown. "A fine police officer you are."


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

He'd watched her go, helpless. Briefly he'd thought of chasing after her then anger overtook him. She'd lied to him, hidden the truth from him for all of these years. Then when she'd finally been forced to come clean she'd attempted to extort a relationship from him so he could see his son.

A son, he wondered briefly if the boy, what had she called him? He wracked his brain and found he couldn't remember the name. Would he look like Patrick? He doubted it, Patrick had always looked more like Val. Both kids did, except for the eyes. They both had his eyes.

Her words about Patrick tore at him. She was right, of course, he had no relationship with his son. A birthday card, a stilted call at Christmas. The lad had never forgiven him for how he'd acted after Val's death.

Lyn had been older, while she hadn't understood, she had at least not held it against him. They had mended those torn fences and were quite close now. How would she take knowing she had a younger brother, half brother?

He didn't imagine Patrick would take it well. He would probably look at it as Robbie trying to replace him, to replace Val, to fix the mistakes he'd made with his first son. The lad would see it as a betrayal.

His words to Laura, before she stormed out, echoed in his mind. He didn't know why he'd said them. He did want her, desperately, so much he could taste it. She haunted his dreams. And not just the one night, ideas of them as a couple, living together, loving. It wasn't a single night with her he wanted, he found he wanted a lifetime.

And she'd offered him that. Then with six monosyllabic words he had destroyed any chance of it. He'd made her words about Patrick come true with a simple sentence. And even as he'd done it, she had still held out an olive branch offering him a chance at a relationship with his son.

People didn't often get second chances. A fresh shot at righting the wrongs of the past. She was offering him that. He would call her during the week, make plans to meet the boy, what was his name? Perhaps, somehow, he would be able to find the words to have a second chance with her as well.

A bitter laugh escaped him, it wouldn't really be a second chance would it. He'd just squandered his second chance. There wouldn't be a third chance. He sunk into his sofa as this sobering thought took root in his brain. He would get his relationship with his son, a second chance of sorts. But any chance with her he'd destroyed.

Now he would have to watch her, inevitably, meet someone new. Fall in love, possibly have another child. Could he do that? Could he just be someone she used to know?

Running his hands through his hair, he pulled at it as images of Laura with another man; younger, more virile, played through his mind. He could see her laughing, smiling up at him, her eyes dancing and filled with love. Their son being lifted in the air by this mystery man. He could see them walking through a park. The child, what was his damn name, holding their hands, giggling as they lifted him swinging him in the air.

Her clear, breathless laughter filled his head, seeming to echo in the room. He imagined picking the boy up at her home and seeing an emptiness in her eyes as she handed him a small backpack. Her voice admonishing him to have…what was his name…home by a certain time. All of the warmth he was accustomed to from her glances leaked away with his careless choice of words.

He stood, angrily pacing the room. Without a second thought he stalked to his kitchen, flung open the cabinet and removed the bottle of whisky. It was open and he was pouring the contents sloppily down his throat before he knew what happened.

The amber liquid burned a path down his throat, pushing away all of his thoughts. He stopped drinking long enough to take a breath. He wiped his mouth, looked at the bottle then tipped it up again, guzzling the liquid, welcoming its burn and the inevitable blackness that would come at the end of the bottle.

Taking the bottle back to his sitting room, he collapsed onto the sofa. The tea service was still on his coffee table and he kicked at it, sending it flying across the room, shattering against the far wall. As he took another pull at the bottled he wondered if the neighbors would investigate and found he didn't care.

Mindlessly, he drank from the bottle. Trying to block out all thoughts of the life she would have without him. The lad would have a better life, a life with someone who would actually remember his name. Draining the last drops from the bottle, he slouched into the cushions. His arm fell to the side, the bottle dropping to the floor.

As his eyes slid closed, her words came to him. " _My job is to protect Matty."_ It would be best to let her take care of Matty. He would stay away, let the other nameless man raise him as his own. All Robbie had to offer him was pain and disappointment. The boy's name played on a loop in his brain as he slipped into a drunken stupor.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

The week had passed with no word from Robbie. She didn't know the protocol for this. Should she call him, seek him out? During the week she'd been on pins and needles, had depended on her schedule to keep her somewhat focused.

In the evenings, after she put Matty to bed, all she could do was think. She found herself checking her phone to make sure it was working. It always was and there were no calls.

There hadn't even been a case to throw them together. One of those rare times with little crime. She'd seen James once, he'd sought her out to ask if he could take Matty to the park at the weekend. Nodding, she'd told him yes. Matty had been thrilled that evening when she'd told him over dinner.

The buzzing of her phone snapped her from her thoughts, finally, a call out. Perhaps she would get her answer as James & Robbie were on schedule. Grabbing her things, she headed for her car and a crime scene.

* * *

She worked the scene, taking careful notes, already drawing a few conclusions. Of course, nothing was final until she did the autopsy but even her casual observations might send detectives off to a fast start.

She didn't want to seem anxious but found her eyes searching the room, her ears listening for those broad tones. It was James' voice she heard first, "What do we have Dr. Hobson?" She looked past him to see if Robbie was near. Seeing her look he shook his head, "He's directing some of the PCs outside. He asked me to get the preliminary from you."

James cringed at her hurt look then smiled inwardly as she quickly covered it. She gave him the rundown finishing with a brusque, "PM tomorrow morning at 9, don't be late."

He knelt beside her, speaking so only she could hear, "Are you sure you don't want me to say something?"

Shaking her head, almost imperceptibly, she matched his lower tones, "No, he's made his decision. I just need to accept it." She stood, speaking more loudly, "Tell your DI I only need one of you in attendance. As you understand the science of what I do better, it's best that it's you."

James stood, understanding her brusque tone, "I will see you bright and early, Dr. Hobson."

Her eyes spoke volumes of thanks, only he would notice or understand. She gathered her belongings and swept out of the room. As she loaded the last of her things into her car, she saw him. His back was to her, he was standing alone. She couldn't help but glare at him, wonder at the level of cowardice it took to abandon a little boy.

Slamming the boot of her car closed, she made her way to the driver's door, anger etched across her face as she thought about Matty. She didn't notice Robbie turn to her.

He'd felt her gaze, was overwhelmed by it. As he'd turned, he could make out the anger even from the distance. It tore at him but he knew it was for the best. She would be angry for just a little while but it would pass and she and Matty, his name now seared in Robbie's brain, would find a new life. A better life than he could offer either of them.

Robbie watched her drive away, lost in his own feelings of inadequacy. He never felt James's glare. James watched Robbie let Laura drive away and wondered how he could do it. He couldn't imagine walking away from a woman like her much less from his own flesh and blood. Shaking his head, he felt his own anger building. Some people didn't deserve happiness.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

 **Another time jump.**

She smiled as she disconnected the call with Ellen. Their dinner, her visit, was coming at a good time. The last six months had taken its toll on her. If not for James she might not have made it through. Ellen had joked about the dishy sergeant, suggesting Laura should pursue a relationship with him. She'd closed down that line of inquiry quickly.

James, as she had learned, was a lovely man. But he wasn't the man for her. They had settled into an almost familial relationship. Even her brother had taken to James, treating him like family. Matty, feeling the closeness of the three adults, had started calling James "Uncle James".

Looking at the body just wheeled in, she sighed. She wouldn't make it home to kiss Matty good night before her dinner. She made a mental note to call him as she left for dinner. Thoroughly washing her hands, she put on a pair of gloves and started her examination.

* * *

She was putting her earrings in when Anne Marie stuck her head into Laura's office, "Dr. Hobson, there's a call out and everyone else is tied up."

Grimacing she turned to look at Anne Marie, "Who's the DI?"

"Malone I believe. He's the name listed on the on call sheet."

She nodded, DI Malone would let her do a quick once over and be on her way. "Thanks Anne Marie, let them know I am on my way."

She grabbed her things and made her way to her car. She pressed the speed dial for her home on her mobile smiling when Matty answered, "Mummy, are you coming home before dinner?"

"No, my love, mummy has to go to work. But I promise to kiss you and tuck you in when I get home."

"OK mummy, will Auntie Ellen be with you."

She laughed, "Yes, she will be and she's told me she has a present for you. But you can only have it if you promise not to give nanny any trouble this evening."

At the promise of a present, he cheered up, "OK mummy, I promise. I love you."

"I love you too Matty, can you put nanny on?"

Laura chatted briefly with the nanny then disconnected the call. Her second call, as she was arriving at the scene was to Ellen. She left a brief message as she parked her car. She was pulling on her scene suit when she saw the last person she wanted to see.

Steeling herself she pushed her arms into the scene suit, "Boys."

James smiled, "Doctor, you're looking very uh…"

She stifled a laugh. James had gone out of his way over the past six months to tease her. Sometimes bordering on insubordination, it actually helped her deal with being near Robbie. His teasing allowed her to push back, sarcasm keeping a wall firmly in place. "I was aiming a little higher than uhhhh, Sergeant." She zipped up her scene suit, staring at him the whole time, "But it's the thought that counts. Shall we?"

James hid a smirk, she always rose to the occasion. Focused on him, not quite, but almost ignoring Robbie.

Together he and Robbie raised the crime scene tape. Robbie's thoughts were running wild. James wasn't right by half. She looked magnificent. He wondered who she was meeting. Of course, she wouldn't just stay home, she would live her life. Marshalling his thoughts, trying to keep a benign look he delivered a bare bones run down of the scene. "The body was found just before half eight."

Still annoyed she was at a crime scene rather than in a nice restaurant, she spared him a dismissive glance. "I'll give a once over and that's your lot."

James couldn't help but dig the knife at Robbie, "Headed somewhere nice?"

She turned to him, "I do have a life you know. A small one but it's my own. And I'm running late so…"

They rounded the corner of the vehicle. The body was shrouded in darkness. She waited as Robbie moved the beam of his flashlight over the face of the prone woman. Ligeia, her college flat mate, one of her dinner companions for the night. It was the last thought she had before everything went dark.

* * *

Robbie watched her from the distance, sitting alone in the back of an ambulance looking lost. She looked tired, scared. He ached to go to her but knew he didn't have the right. He should leave it for James but found he couldn't. Drawn to her he deliberately shuffled his feet, not wanting to startle her.

She heard the footsteps, expected it to be one of the paramedics and turned to the noise. To her surprise it was Robbie stepping into the ambulance. It's the closest he'd been to her, alone, since that day in his flat.

She couldn't help but feel somewhat comforted by him, by his presence. A pang of hurt sliced through her as she realized she wanted him to hold her, to comfort her. At his soft smile she pushed the hurt away, making a joke at her own expense, "You'd think I'd be used to it by now."

He marveled at her strength, overwhelmed by the desire to comfort her, to take her into his arms and hold her, protect her. "Oh, not like this. With a stranger sure, you can find some distance. But…" He motioned back to the scene, "How did you know her?"

He was so close now, she could just make out the trace of his cologne. She didn't know why he was interviewing her as opposed to James. All she could do was focus on the facts, "Flat mates, we were at college here together, same year." Automatically he handed her his handkerchief. She laughed thinking the last time a man had handed her his handkerchief. It had been James and Robbie had been the cause. Taking it she pushed the memory away, letting her manners take over and focusing on the facts. "Thanks, we were due to meet tonight believe it or not. Oh God, Ellen will be wondering where we are. Ellen Jacoby, when she's in town we try to get together to meet up, the three of us."

He was suddenly calmer, she hadn't had a date. She was meeting girlfriends. She wasn't moving on, he wondered if there was a reason. He shook the hope from his mind, just because she wasn't meeting a man didn't mean there wasn't a man in her life. The dreams which had haunted him over the past months flooded his mind. Her and Matty with another man, laughing, happy. He had to get away from her. Moving abruptly he left the ambulance. "I'll let you get on with it." He took a few steps away, "Do you have any contact information for next of kin?"

She startled as he moved then walked away. She wondered what had prompted him to pull away. Dropping the blanket to the floor, she climbed wearily from the ambulance. Why had he come to talk with her? Why not let James handle it? She shook her head as she started the walk back to her car, "I don't but I'm sure Ellen does. I'll have her call James with the information."

* * *

After the autopsy he found himself in front of her house. He had no idea how he'd gotten there. But he knew he needed to see her, check she was OK. It wasn't until he was knocking on the door that he thought of Matty.

A woman he'd never met before answered the door, "I was looking for Dr. Hobson."

"And you are?"

Pulling out his warrant card, "DI Lewis."

Something resembling recognition crossed her face, "Oh, come on."

As he stepped in, it occurred to him why she recognized him. This was the Ellen she'd mentioned that night. "Dr. Jacoby?"

She giggled, "Yes." She closed the door behind them and led him into the sunroom,

They chatted and he was surprised when she said Laura had told her he was a sweetie. He'd had to look away, couldn't imagine it had been recently. She was rambling about their time at school when Laura joined them.

He stood a soft smile starting as he saw her. She seemed smaller, more vulnerable. There was anxiety on her face seeing him in her home.

Laura stepped into the room, thankful Matty wasn't home. She forced herself to focus on the case. "What were the results of Rawbones' post mortem?" He scoffed. "They'll tell me at work."

"Are you up to it?"

She made a face and walked toward the French doors, opening them. "What else am I going to do? It's not like we were sisters. Ligeia was just someone I used to know." She opened the second set of doors and stared into the garden. She looked back to him. "I should have been a better friend."

His heart stopped for a moment, he wondered if she was talking about her relationship with Ligeia or their relationship. "I'll leave you." She nodded tightly as he turned to leave. At the doorway to the sunroom, "Do you need anything?"

"No, Inspector, I don't need anything."

He hesitated for a second, she hoped he would ask the next question. Hoped he would ask what she wanted. Even now, she wanted him. Not for herself any more but for Matty. She wanted him to want Matty. He'd come to her home and hadn't even bothered to ask about his son.

She had to turn away, couldn't bear it if he turned back and saw her crying. Hearing the door close, she let the grief wash over her. The small piece of her which had fervently hoped he would one day change his mind died. He didn't want them. She let the tears fall, unsure if she was mourning her friend or the loss of her last bit of hope.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Ellen found her, crumpled into the chair, tears streaming down her face. "Laura, why don't you just confront him?"

Shaking her head, she desperately wiped at the tears, "No, he has to want it for himself. I don't want him in Matty's life unless he chooses to be. If I told him what to do, he would do it out of guilt. Matty…" She paused, gasping for breath, "We are fine without him."

Ellen frowned, unsure how much more she should say, "You love him."

A cold look crossed Laura's face, Ellen knew she'd pushed too far, "No, I don't. I could have, would have if he'd let me." Seeing the objection on Ellen's face she held up her hand, "I know you don't approve of my decision not to tell Robbie. But you weren't here before he left, you didn't see the shape he was in. I know him, had I told him he would have spiraled even further out of control. I couldn't take care of him and a child."

"You don't know that Laura, having a child might have straightened him up."

A bitter laugh filled the room, "Yes, because knowing he has a child has done so much for him." She glared at Ellen, "He's drinking again. He thinks no one knows but I've recognized the signs. You forget, I was the one who picked him up from pubs, poured him into his bed at night. I know what it looks like."

"I wonder who's doing it for him now?"

"James occasionally. He hasn't told me but he mentioned it to Michael."

"Why do you suppose James hasn't told you?"

Laura shrugged, "Loyalty, he still holds out hope that Robbie will come round."

"And you, do you still hold out hope?"

Tears slid down Laura's face, "Until today, yes."

"Why today? He showed up here, when he didn't need to. It was fairly clear to me he wanted to check you were OK."

"But he never asked about his son. I don't care how he feels about me. How does he come to my home and not ask after his own flesh and blood?"

Ellen crossed the room, pulling Laura to her. She had no words to say, no solace to offer. The only thing she could do was hold Laura and let her cry.

* * *

Laura couldn't take being in the house. The walls were beginning to close in. She was gathering her things when Ellen returned from her walk.

"Are you going somewhere?"

Laura nodded, "Work, just for a few hours. I'll be back before Matty gets home from school."

"Is that wise?"

"It's better than sitting around here trying to figure out where it all went wrong."

Laura walked past Ellen and Ellen grabbed her arm, "Do you think we should call Alec?"

Shaking her head, Laura laughed, "No, I don't." The sad look on Ellen's face softened her, "It's like the instructions say, never return to a firework once lit." A sad smile crossed her face as she squeezed Ellen's hand, "Advice I should take too."

Laura headed for the door, Ellen's words stopped her in her tracks, "Have you ever considered leaving?"

Turning back to Ellen, "Leaving Oxford?"

"If you're so certain he's never going to come round, why stay? It's only harder on you. You could come back to London, teach, consult with the Met."

"Why should I leave? I love it here. It's been my home for a long time."

"Just think about it. Maybe making a clean break would be good for both of you."

* * *

She'd barely made it into the office when a call out came in. As she was pulling out of the car park she looked at the address. It couldn't be. Assuming the dispatcher had made a mistake on the street number she continued driving. Once she was on the street she could follow the trail of police cars.

Laura arrived at the scene and looked at the house in a daze. As she carried her kit into the house, all of the color left her face. People walked past her, all a blur. This couldn't be right, first Ligeia now this house. She was talking to herself when Robbie walked up to her. "This is wrong."

Robbie had spotted her the minute she stepped around the privet. What the hell was she doing here? Stepping away from the PCs he made his way to her. She looked pale, shaken. He closed the distance between them, reaching for her, "Laura, what…"

Her head still shaking, "When the address came through I…I thought I'd got the wrong number. I lived here; we lived here, Ligeia, Ellen and me. This was our house." She looked around madly. "This was our house."

He dragged her from the house, couldn't have her corrupting his crime scene. Shoving her roughly into her car, he looked down at her, "Don't leave. We need to have a conversation."

She didn't move as he slammed the door to her car. Looking around he spotted James and made his way to him, "We'll need Rawbones." At James' confused look, he pointed back to Laura's car. "She lived here with our other victim."

James' eyes went to the car, concern for Laura raking through him, "Is she OK?"

"Who knows?"

"Did you ask her?"

Robbie stared at him, "No, I was too busy making sure she didn't corrupt our crime scene." At the coldness in James' stare, Robbie blustered, "She's involved somehow."

"You think Dr. Hobson, Laura, had something to do with these killings?"

"Having a connection to one murder is a coincidence, having a connection to two murders is involved. We need to bring her in, question her."

"Are you insane? It's Dr. Hobson, you've known her for years."

Robbie glared at James, "I don't know her all that well and I assure you, you don't know her as well as you think you do. Bring her in."

James shook his head, "No, I won't. I will take her home and gently ask her about any connection. But I won't bring her to the station. If you want that done, you'll have to do it yourself."

They glared at one another, neither wanting to give quarter. It was the rounded tones of a female voice neither liked to hear at a crime scene which broke their contest, "Why are two of my detectives screaming at one another at a crime scene?"

They turned in tandem to look at her guiltily. James shook his head, "It's nothing ma'am. A disagreement on next steps."

Looking between the two she raised her eyebrow, "What is the next step that required shouting?"

Robbie cut his eyes to James, waiting to see if he would tell Innocent, "Dr. Hobson ma'am."

"What about her, has she been injured?"

"No ma'am, she's connected to this residence. Lived here when she was at Oxford."

Jean waved her hand, "And?"

James stepped forward, "Inspector Lewis believes she is somehow connected and should be questioned." He saw Jean start to agree and added quickly, "At the station. He asked me to bring her in."

Jean looked at Robbie curiously, something was going on, had been for months. "Well I think you are both right. She does need to be questioned, but I don't see any need for it to be at the station. She is one of us. Where is she now?"

Robbie pointed to the street, "I put her in her car and told her not to leave."

Jean blinked at the brusqueness in his words, "Perhaps you should take her home Inspector. Question her where she is comfortable. She's had a rough few days."

"James can do it, I'll stay here and monitor the scene."

Jean looked at James, questioning without words what was going on, "James, are you comfortable taking Dr. Hobson home?"

He nodded, "Yes ma'am. I'll have a PC follow to give me a ride back."

Robbie stalked away before Jean could say anything further to him. Watching him walk away, she sighed, "James, I don't know what is going on but I trust you would tell me if it was something which would affect the running of the station." She turned in time to see him nod. "I know about his drinking, James. I've let it go for now because it hasn't affected his work. But one more outburst like today and I will intervene."

He nodded, "I understand, ma'am."

"Is there anything I should know?"

"Nothing that should concern you. It's personal."

"Involving Dr. Hobson?"

He met her gentle gaze, "I'm not comfortable sharing that information ma'am."

She watched him, trying to discern what he wasn't saying. There had been rumors about Hobson and Lewis for years but she'd always ignored it as idle gossip. Based upon James' reaction, perhaps it wasn't simple gossip. "I'm going to leave it for now James. But there might come a time when you are forced to tell me."

"I hope it never comes to that ma'am."

He turned, headed towards Laura. Jean watched him go. She'd only ever seen James so protective of someone once before. It was the day he told her he wanted to work with Robbie Lewis. Based upon the way he'd acted today, perhaps his allegiance had changed.

 **To the guest reviewer - have a little faith. I do know where the story is going. Plus there may be historical information yet to be revealed. Additionally, She gave him the chance. Told him to call her and she would make sure he knew Matty. Six months have passed without a call. I think that buys her a bit of annoyance.**

 **I don't necessarily excuse her not telling him for so long. But her reasons are solid. And the past six months have proved her right. Patience grasshopper...**


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

James tapped lightly on her window, cursing himself when she jumped in the seat. She rolled the window down and he smiled at her, "Do you mind if I drive you home?"

She shook her head, opening the door, "Thank you."

He walked her around the car, opening the door for her. He waited until she was settled then closed the door and walked to the other side. Leaning into the car to adjust the seat he smiled at her. She laughed thinking about his lanky frame trying to sit in her seat.

Settling into the car, he started the engine and drove away. She let him drive for several blocks then finally had to ask, "Does Robbie know you are taking me home?"

He nodded, keeping his eyes on the road, "He does."

"He said we needed to have a conversation."

"He delegated it to me." Feeling her tense beside him, he reached for her hand. "He wanted to do it at the station."

"He what?"

"Laura, don't read too much into it. He's as out of sorts as you are."

"You're taking his side?"

"There are no sides to take, except maybe Matty's. I am as mad at him as you are that he never called. I don't understand it either. And you won't let me confront him and you won't do it yourself, so there's no hope in understanding. But he's hurt and you're hurt and no one is winning."

They drove in silence. Finally Laura said calmly, "Ellen thinks I should go back to London."

Pulling into her driveway, James set the parking brake and turned to her. "It's not the worse idea." Seeing the tears filling her eyes he took her hand, "You're tearing each other apart. I don't know why he hasn't tried to meet Matty but I know seeing each other is killing you both. Perhaps going away will let you both heal."

"Why should I leave? Oxford is my home too."

"Because you have the means and the opportunity. You will adapt, move on with your life. Do you really think he can or will for that matter?"

"He's never going to acknowledge Matty, is he?"

"I don't know. What I do know is he has very complex feelings for you. Seeing you every day makes things worse."

"How do you know that, James?"

"He says things when he's drunk."

"What things, James?"

He shook his head, "No, I have never betrayed your confidences. I owe him the same respect."

His words hurt but she respected him for his stance, "I suppose you have to ask me some questions."

He nodded, "Tell me about your time living in that house."

She smiled, remembering a simpler time in her life, "It was Ligeia, Ellen and me plus Alec & Peter."

"Alec & Peter who?".

"Alec Pickman and Peter Hawkins."

"Still in touch?"

She shook her head. "I saw Alec a couple of years back on the Broad. Not to talk to, I was driving but…"

"Where is he now?"

She looked at him. "Around, from all I'd heard he'd given up poetry to become an artist. He read English, took a gap year and then did his D Phil." She thought for a moment. "To be honest, I think the only reason he stayed on was because of Ligeia."

"They were an item?"

She smiled and nodded, "THE item, for her part anyway. Alec was mad, bad and lock up your daughters."

"And Peter Hawkins?"

She shook her head. "I don't have a clue."

"When did you see him last?"

She laughed. "Now you're asking. Couple of days before the after finals bash." She looked at him. "I came down with mumps of all things. So Cinders you shall not go to the ball." She laughed. "My dad picked me up and drove me home. By the time I'd recovered we'd all gone our separate ways."

"So you didn't see him again?"

She shrugged. "I called him a couple of times. But I never heard back. People slip through the cracks if you're not careful."

"Any reason you can think why this case might be tied to Dr. Willard's?"

She shook her head, "I'm not the best person to ask James. You really should talk with Ellen. Ligeia and I lived in the same town but only saw each other three times a year, when Ellen came to town. If not for Ellen, I don't know if I would have ever talked with her."

He nodded toward the house, "Will she be here?"

Laura nodded, "Yes, come in. You can talk with her. I need to wash my face before Matty gets home."

* * *

James walked as calmly as he could into his shared office. Robbie didn't bother to look up. As he sat, he started talking. "Dr. Hobson isn't connected to this case. She rarely talked with Dr. Willard. Dr. Jacoby was the thread that held them together. Dr. Hobson gave me the names of the two blokes who lived with them. One of them lives in town. Do you want to go with me to talk to him?"

"We have another lead to chase down first. A Mary Gwilliam."

"Where did you get her name?"

"It was spelled out with magnets on their refrigerator door."

"Do you want me to run the particulars on her?"

Robbie stood, grabbing his jacket, "I've already done it. I'll give you the run down in the car."

* * *

The lead led to another dead body. Further research led them back to Laura's door. Even James was curious. He'd only ask that Robbie wait until the morning to speak with her. He knew then Matty would be at school. It was probably best for all involved not to add Matty to the equation.

He knocked on the door, not trusting Robbie to do it. Ellen answered, invited them in. She smiled kindly at James but spared a more critical look at Robbie. Her mind catalogued signs of whether or not he had been drinking recently. He seemed fine enough but she really didn't know him and realized she probably wasn't the best judge. She did find it interesting he didn't look around, didn't seem to be interested in anything in the house.

She ushered them into the sunroom, "Laura, the two inspectors are here." Laura looked back at them, shocked they were both there. "Do you want me to go?"

Laura shook her head, "No, stay." She motioned to a chair and cautiously watched Robbie take it while James stood behind him. There was something hidden, cautious in James' glance and Robbie wouldn't meet her eyes.

Moving to the chair across from Robbie, she squeezed Ellen's arm. Ellen smiled, offering a sense of solidarity. Even she had noticed a difference in the two men.

Robbie started as soon as she'd sat, "We found another body. A woman named Mary Gwilliam."

Laura shook her head, "What has that to do with me?"

"She called her, several times. You don't remember speaking to her?"

Shaking her head, "That's because I didn't speak to her. When was this meant to be?"

James handed her the paper with the call notes on it, "Last call is three weeks ago, October the 8th, 23:10, 9 seconds in duration."

She looked at the paper and frowned then shook her head. "Nope. There was…I did get this weird message. But that was eons back."

James handed her another piece of paper. "First call, March the 17th, 20 past 4 in the afternoon 1 minute and 8 seconds in duration."

She looked at the paper, turning it in her hands as if it might shed light to look at it from a different angle. "Well I don't know if it was this woman but it was a woman's voice. I don't even really remember what she said. Something along the lines of she'd found my number in the phone book and if I was the Laura Hobson she was looking I'd know what it was about."

Robbie watched her carefully, not believing anything she said, "Anything else?"

She thought for a moment. "Well, it was a bit odd. But I am pretty sure she mentioned Rochester."

From behind Laura, Ellen said, "Rochester, oh I've never been to Rochester."

Laura laughed looking back at Ellen, grateful for the moment of levity. Robbie continued, "And you never called her back?"

"No, I just assumed she got hold of the wrong Laura Hobson." She looked at James who had to look away.

Robbie knew what he needed to do, had felt it needed to be done since the second body. But suddenly, he was hesitant. This was Laura, his Laura, she wasn't capable of anything quite this treacherous. He softened his voice, "Look, I know this is going to sound…Can anyone vouch for your movements the night that Professor Willard died?"

Laura laughed thinking he was kidding. She knew they were not in line with one another but surely he couldn't think her responsible. Slowly the realization he was serious crossed her face. "Robbie?"

He closed his eyes shaking his head, "It's procedure."

She looked at James who looked even more uncomfortable; then back to Robbie. Neither of them trusted her. Her voice was softer, hurt, "No, there isn't. A body came in late I worked through then dressed at the mortuary. It was around 7:30 when Anne Marie informed me of the call out. On my way to the site I called home and talked with Matty and the nanny." She paused, challenging him to say something, "I phoned Ellen and left a message to say I'd be late and I drove straight to the institute." She shook her head at him as if to say what else do you want. "Anything else?" Robbie looked away, unable to meet her eyes at the mention of the son he didn't know, "Do you want me to account for the night the girl got killed to?"

Looking away from her, wanting to be anywhere but in this room he nodded, "Please."

She stared at him with empty eyes. "I put Matty to bed early, read him a story and fell asleep in his bed. Ellen was watching TV downstairs, she'll tell you I never left the house."

Ellen nodded. "She didn't."

"And you're sure you don't know Mary Gwilliam." Challenging him to look at her she shook her head. "We might need to speak with your nanny, will that be possible."

Laura stood, motioning for them to leave, "She will be back in an hour. You are welcome to call her here or I can give you her mobile number. Her name is Sarah McDonald."

He motioned to James, "Get the number, we can call her later." Without another word to James he left the room and let himself out of the house. He kept his eyes fixed firmly on the ground in front of him. He didn't want to see anything in her house, no signs of the boy.

James watched him walk out and turned to Laura, "I'm sorry."

She turned to him, anger brewing in her eyes, "For what James?"

"I'm sorry we had to do that. I at least talked him into doing it here rather than at the station. He wanted to come by here last night. I talked him out of that too."

"What's the thought here James? That I've gone on a killing rampage. That I killed one of my oldest friends and two random people. Does he really believe it?"

"Not really, no. He's hurting, he wants, I don't know what he wants." James paused, he looked to Ellen for help. She nodded, encouraging him, as if she knew what he wanted to say. "Laura, you need to confront him. This limbo isn't helping anyone. He's not going to do it. It's time one of you acted like the adult."

She stared at him, then looked to Ellen. She could see Ellen agreed with him, "Get out, both of you."

Ellen stood, "Laura, we understand…"

"I said get out. If you don't leave, I will."


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Ellen grabbed a coat and left with James. At the door they both looked back at the house. She reached out and grabbed his arm, squeezing it lightly, "It had to be said. She'll calm down. I'll talk her round later."

He nodded, comforted by her words, "Do you need a ride somewhere?"

She shook her head, "You forget, I used to live here. I'll walk about, give her a few hours."

James pulled his card from his pocket, "If you need anything, my mobile is on this."

She tucked it in her pocket, "Do you have any idea why the Inspector hasn't asked about Matty?"

"No, and I promised her I wouldn't confront him about it."

"Some promises are meant to be broken. Perhaps this is one of those."

He shook his head, "It's not in my nature."

She looked toward Robbie sitting in the car, "Does he know you know about Matty?"

James shrugged, "He's a sharp detective, he'll know something is up. But as to how much he will have sussed out, I don't know."

"Maybe use that as your invitation."

James laughed as he walked toward the waiting car, "Call me if you need anything."

He opened the car door and was barely seated before Robbie pulled away, "Did you get the number?"

James nodded, "I did. Do you want me to call her later or would you prefer to handle it?"

"You can handle it." Robbie drove in silence, "How long have you known Dr. Hobson has a son?"

James stared straight ahead, "About a year now. I saw a picture of him in her home and asked."

"Did she tell you who the father is?"

He debated with himself, Ellen's words echoing in his ears, "I never asked. I figured if she wanted anyone to know she would tell."

Robbie fell silent again, debating whether he should admit his secret. "Do you think she's involved?"

James shook his head, "No, and I don't think you believe it either. I don't know what's going on between you two but perhaps it's time you talked with her."

"What makes you think something is going on between us?"

"She hasn't had drinks with us in months. To my knowledge, you haven't had lunch together. It seemed before we caught your wife's killer you two were getting closer. You did show up on her doorstep that night."

His mind wandered to the day after that night. He reflected on his elation then her revelation. "People aren't always who you think they are."

It was James' turn to fall silent, he worked through in his mind what he wanted to say. "In my experience, sir, people are rarely who we have built them up to be in our minds. The best of them turn out to be ever so much more. I know that's how you were to me sir."

Robbie flicked a quick look at James, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"If I had listened to the station gossip and accepted it as fact, I would have written you off as a drunk has been when you came back. And it would have been the biggest mistake of my life. Life happens, people adapt. They do what they need to do to survive. You fell into the bottom of a big bottle of whisky. But somehow you found a way to climb out. I think that's pretty admirable." James paused, letting his words sink in, "I don't know what Dr. Hobson has been through, but I sense it is something that might make most people give up. She didn't. She is raising a child on her own, remains at the top of her field of specialty and from what I have always witnessed, is exceptionally supportive of the people she cares for. I think those are traits to be admired."

"You don't have all of the facts, James."

"Care to share any of those facts with me?"

For a single moment, Robbie considered telling James everything. As he parked at the station, he made his decision. "No, James, it's between Dr. Hobson and me."

Anger flared in James, anger at Laura, at Robbie and for Matty. "Sir, I'd say when it spills over into our cases, it's no longer between the two of you. Perhaps it's time you resolved whatever it is."

James slung the door open and was out of the car before Robbie could respond. Robbie let him go, his last words echoing in his mind. Was he letting his anger at Laura cloud his judgement?

Getting out of the car, he opted to walk rather than joining James in the station. He hoped it would clear his head. James was right, he and Laura had been getting closer. It was the reason he'd shown up on her door that night. A small part of him had hoped she would invite him in, into her home, into her bed, into her life.

The next morning he'd been grateful to wake in his own bed. In the cold light of day, he'd known falling into her bed wouldn't have been the best thing for either of them. It's why he'd wanted to ask her on a date. He'd wanted to do things right, woo her. James would have probably laughed at the notion but he'd never wanted anything casual with her. With her he'd wanted something which would last a lifetime.

It was why he'd taken so long. He didn't want to rush and risk ruining what they could have. When she'd shown up on his doorstep, he'd thought it fate. Then her revelation and his careless words. Her face after he'd said them played on a loop in his head.

She'd said something else that day. Something that echoed James' words. They weren't the same people they had been. Looking back, he could see how she'd changed in the time he was gone. There had been a reticence with him. It seemed she had always been watching him, seeking something from him.

Of course, she'd been looking for a sign. A sign he might be ready for a relationship with her and to know his son. Then, when she'd finally found him ready, he'd proven she'd been right to hide the boy, Matty, from him. He'd proven the point even more when he hadn't called her. His stubborn pride refusing to see he might need this fresh chance as much as she had.

Instead, he'd fallen into another bottle of whisky. Perhaps not as deep as the one after Val, but more nights than not, he drank. James knew, perhaps not the full extent of it but enough. He wondered if Laura knew, if she suspected. He didn't think he could handle it if she did.

Turning he decided he needed to speak with her, needed to apologize for treating her like a suspect, needed to meet his son. He picked up his pace until he was running at full tilt. He noticed James coming out of the station, a look of panic on his face.

"Dr. Jacoby has been attacked."

"Where? Is Laura OK?"

James nodded, guiding Robbie to the car, "Dr. Hobson wasn't with her. She was near Alec Pickman's boat."

"How did you find out?"

"She had my card in her pocket. A&E called me."

Opening the door to the car, he paused, "Does Laura know?"

James nodded as he slid into the car, "I called her. She said she would meet us at the hospital."

"Is she…"

"Alive, but in critical condition."


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

He watched her talk with Alec Pickman inside the hospital room. He sensed an uneasiness from her. There was something about the man she didn't like. His protective instincts kicked in so he pushed his way into the room. Laura looked up, relief flooding her features. She and Robbie might be at odds but she would rather his company to Alec's any day of the week.

Some emotion she didn't recognize crossed his face. If it had been anyone else, she might have called it jealousy. Whatever it was, Alec pulled his hands away from her shoulders, moved across the room.

Robbie stepped between them, a subtle notice to Alec to stay away from Laura. When James joined them they updated Laura on what they'd learned. She smiled at Robbie's subtle way of letting her know he didn't think she was involved. If he'd still suspected her, he wouldn't be giving her any details.

At the mention of Rochester, Alec chimed into the conversation. She couldn't believe she'd never known what he'd talked about. They'd all known someone who'd been unable to withstand the rigors of Oxford. But she'd ever known there was a place dedicated to handling it.

Looking at her watch, she knew she had to get home. Ellen wouldn't be waking up anytime soon and Matty had to be her priority. She still wasn't sure how she was going to explain to him where Ellen was. Gathering her things, she made her excuses to the three men. Her hope had been to escape them all. Her guilt at throwing Ellen from her home was fresh and strong.

Unfortunately, all three men took it as their cue to leave too. They walked along the corridor together. Alec, sensing something was amiss among his fellow travelers, had to stir the pot. He had to tell them more about Rochester. She tried to ignore his jibes, knowing he was trying to goad someone. There was nothing he liked more than causing a reaction.

At his taunts about her and a possible relationship with Robbie, she was surprised when Robbie stepped in front of her. It was a protective stance she hadn't expected. At the same time, she could feel James behind her, his glare palpable without even turning around.

The look on Alec's face as he tried to discern the relationship among them was priceless. It wasn't often Alec was pushed back. He'd been so disconcerted he'd opted for stairs rather than waiting on the elevator. Both men waited until he was gone before moving from around her.

The elevator dinged and she stepped from behind Robbie. As she moved to the elevator, Robbie touched her arm, "Can I walk you to your car?"

She nodded, scared to say anything lest her voice should betray her emotions. They rode in the elevator in silence. They were outdoors before Robbie finally spoke.

"I'm going to put a PC on your house until this case is resolved."

She nodded, "Does that mean you no longer think I am a suspect?"

"I'm sorry Laura, I never should have…"

"You were doing your job."

He stopped walking, "Don't do that."

She stopped walking, looking back at him questioningly, "Do what, Robbie?"

"Making excuses for me. Don't you think it's time you started holding me accountable for something?"

She blinked, unsure what to say, "I tried that once Robbie. You pushed me away." Her emotions threatened to push through and she took a deep breath, "I can't do this, Robbie. I'm having a hard enough time simply putting one foot in front of another. Everyone seems to think I am so strong, what if I'm tired of being strong? What if I need someone to be strong for me for a change?"

He looked at her, really seeing her for the first time since he'd returned. At last, he could see the brittleness, the fatigue which seemed to pull at the edges of her. He cursed himself for adding to her burden. "I don't know what to do, Laura."

Tears fell down her cheeks, her emotions finally getting the best of her. "Neither do I. The difference is, I don't have the luxury of not figuring out. I have a little boy at home who needs me. He needs at least one of his parents to be there." She saw him start to object, "I get it, Robbie. You don't want to be involved in his life. That's your choice, but at least stop punishing me for it."

She walked away, leaving him with her words echoing in his ears. Was that what she really thought? That he was punishing her. He longed to go after her, had made up his mind to do it when his phone buzzed.

It was a text from James. The taunting words from Alec Pickman had given him an idea. He gave Robbie an address and asked him to meet him there in a few hours. He could still go after her but what they needed to talk about wouldn't take a few hours. No, he needed to fully understand what he wanted before he talked to her.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

Laura drove home slowly, trying to collect her thoughts. Her conversation with Robbie had unsettled her, possibly more than Ellen being attacked. There was a feeling of the world closing in around her. This case seemed to be circling her and yet she couldn't fathom why. Ligeia dead, Ellen attacked, some girl she didn't know killed for living in a house she once lived in and a woman she didn't know who'd once called her home.

She was worried. If Robbie couldn't connect the links, was she in danger also? More importantly, was Matty? At the light she extracted her mobile from her purse, pressing the speed dial button for her brother.

She could tell he was distracted when he answered, "Am I catching you at a bad time?"

"A bit, I was in a meeting. But you never call during the day, has something happened?"

"Ellen was attacked."

"When, where?"

"This morning, she was out for a walk. We'd had a fight and I threw her out…"

"Laura, you can't blame yourself."

"Can't I, she would have been home with me. But I told her to leave."

"Is she OK?"

"Alive but critical. I've just left her at the hospital."

"What do the police say?"

A deep sigh escaped her, "They think it's related to Ligeia."

"Does that idiot Inspector still think you're a suspect?"

Pulling into her drive, she laughed, "He never really did. He's hurt, we're all hurt."

"Damn it Laura, you're doing it again. Excusing his crappy behavior."

"You're the second person to say that to me today."

"Who was the other?"

She smiled as she got out of the car, "The idiot Inspector himself."

Michael paused, not really sure where to go with her comment. "Why don't you pack a bag, come stay with me for a few days? I won't be there tonight because I'm stuck up north. But you have a key. I'll be back tomorrow."

"I don't want to be that far from Ellen. But I would like to send Sarah up with Matty, just until the case is solved."

"Laura, are you in danger?"

"Robbie's put a PC on the house. I'm safe enough. I'm just stretched a little thin at the moment. Having Matty somewhere I know he's safe will make me feel better."

"OK, let me move a few things around. I should be able to get home late tonight. Go ahead and send Sarah up with Matty."

She shook her head as she let herself into the house, "No, she wouldn't be comfortable there by herself. I'll send her up tomorrow after Matty gets out of school. That way you don't have to change your schedule."

"Laura…"

"It's fine. There's already a PC outside. We'll be fine."

"I don't like this, Laura. Can James come stay at the house with you?"

She shook her head, "No, they are full steam on the investigation."

"Go to a hotel. I don't like the idea of you staying in your house."

"Michael, I don't plan on leaving the house. Matty will be home soon. I'll keep him inside behind locked doors."

He sighed, knowing he couldn't change her mind. "Call me tomorrow when Sarah and Matty leave."

"I will. And, thank you."

"For what?"

"For not lecturing me too much about Robbie."

"You know my feelings. No use beating a dead horse."

She paused, silence lingered between them. "Ellen thinks I should move to London, leave Oxford. James agrees."

"And what do you think?"

"I think it's time for me to move on. And I don't think I can do it here. There are too many reminders."

"I'll support whatever decision you make."

The kitchen door opened, "Michael, I have to run. Matty just got home."

"OK, give him a hug from me. And, Laura, I love you, be safe."

"I love you too."

She ended the call and took a deep breath. By the time Matty came running into the room, she was smiling.


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Robbie drove back to the hospital to meet James. His conversation with Laura on a constant loop in his head. She thought he was punishing her. It couldn't be further from the truth. He'd stayed away because he agreed with her. It was best he stay away from the boy.

He knew if he was near her too much, one day, he would crack and want to know about Matty. It was better for all of them if he just stayed away. But this case had thrown them back together. All of his protective desires were reawakened. When he'd seen Alec Pickman touching her he'd wanted to throttle the man.

When Alec had made those comments about Laura liking her men wild it infuriated him. Had that been what she'd seen in him? He wasn't sure he'd been wild but he'd definitely been out of control. Perhaps that was what had attracted her to him and now he wasn't. Did she no longer find him attractive?

He shook his head. No, he remembered the look on her face when he'd asked her out. It had been equal parts excitement and worry. There had been a light in her eyes when he'd told her why he asked her out. A light he hadn't seen since that day. Now when she looked at him there was nothing but sadness.

Even without the stress of this case, the light which normally sparkled within her had been gone. He'd caused that. His choice to not pursue a relationship with either her or Matty had extinguished it. But now he knew it was a mistake. He wanted, needed both of them in his life. Perhaps it wouldn't be perfect, he would definitely make mistakes but he needed to make those mistakes. They needed to make those mistakes, together.

He parked, more clear-headed than he had been in weeks. His phone buzzed and he looked down at the text from James, "Found something you need to see. Get here soon as."

He briskly walked to the room where James was. It was a hive of activity. James had a grim look on his face, "What am I looking at?"

James opened the book, "Hospital admissions." He pointed to the page, "Look here between the 16th of and the 21st of March 1986."

Robbie ran his finger down the page, one name standing out: Laura Hobson. "I don't understand…She never mentioned."

Cold anger filtered through James, he'd not doubted Laura until this point. But now, he could feel the seed of doubt developing in his brain. "There's more I'm afraid. Given the Mary Gwilliam connection to the Rochester House foundation and their particular line of business, I took a look at this." He opened another book, placing it in front of Robbie, "The 17th of March, bottom right hand corner of the page."

"March 17th, birth, male, 23:48, 6 pounds 7 ounces, mother Hobson, L." All sorts of things ran through Robbie's head. Unsavory ideas, she'd had other children? He looked back at James, "It's a mistake it has to be."

James nodded to the paper, "Turn to the next entry."

He turned the page, "March 18th, birth female, 00:35, 5 pounds 11 ounces, mother's name Hobson, L."

"She had twins, sir."

Robbie scoffed, he didn't know how, but he knew this wasn't true. "I don't believe this. Laura wouldn't have given up her children."

"She did, sir. The father was listed as Peter Hawkins. Mary Gwilliam helped to have them adopted but not together. It makes sense, sir."

"What makes sense sergeant? Even if it's true, why go after all of those other people? Why not go after her? She was young and probably scared."

"Peter Hawkins had a disease, one which was hereditary. What if one of the twins have it? What they are doing would never make sense to us?"

"That means Laura is in even more danger." Robbie quickened his steps, "I'm going to go over there now."

"No, sir, the best thing we can do is find out who these twins are." James' phone rang, he looked at the screen, "It's the adoption registry."

Robbie kept walking toward his car. He didn't believe it, no matter what was written, he didn't believe it. She might have hidden Matty from him but she would have revealed this when people started dying. He knew it. He'd never been more certain of her than in his moment.

James approached, giving the details for the two children. They climbed into his car, headed for the home of the girl.

* * *

Laura watched the PC walk through her yard. It was a thankless job. She opened the door, "PC Delaney, would you like a cup of tea, chase away the chill?"

He turned to her, smiling, "That would be lovely Dr. Hobson."

"Give me a few minutes, I'll bring it out."

She fussed around the kitchen, making the tea, happy for the distraction. As she waited for the kettle, Matty came running into the room, "Mummy, can I go out and talk with the policeman?"

She knelt to his level, "No, love, he's working remember."

"But Uncle James plays with me."

Ruffling his hair, she laughed, "Not when he's working."

The whistling kettle drew her attention and she stood to make the tea. "Can we at least bring him some biscuits?"

"You can ask him if he wants any."

"If he doesn't, can I have his?"

"Not before your dinner young man."

"Can I have them after my dinner?"

"You would rather have biscuits than pudding?"

He nodded affirmatively, "I would rather have both."

"Nice try, but not going to happen." His little frown made her laugh, "Come on, let's deliver this tea."

Matty followed her to the door. PC Delaney heard it open and turned to them. Laura handed him the tea as Matty danced past her, "Mr. Police Constable would you like some biscuits to go with your tea?"

He smiled down at the little boy, "No, not right now. Perhaps later though."

"If you don't want them, can I have yours?"

The PC laughed, "I think that's a conversation best held with your mother."

Laura smiled at the man, wrapping her arm around her son, "I think we will just save the biscuits in case PC Delaney wants them later. Matty, run along and wash up for dinner."

Matty waved at the PC then darted back into the house, "If you want more tea later, just knock. I'll be up for a couple more hours."

"Thank you Dr. Hobson. I get off shift at nine. I'll be fine until then."

She nodded, looking up at the sky, "Horrible night for this assignment. You must be on Chief Super Innocent's bad side."

He laughed, "No ma'am, I volunteered. A bunch of us did, you're well liked at the station and we take care of our own."

Tears filled her eyes, "Thank you. That means a lot."

He nodded toward the house, "Go on, feed your little boy."

She nodded, "Let me know when you're leaving."

"Will do ma'am."

She closed the door, locking it behind her. With a deep breath, she wiped the tears from her eyes. It was surprising that he'd volunteered for the job. She heard Matty coming down the stairs and headed to the kitchen.

* * *

They knocked on the door and showed their warrant cards when the woman answered, "Mrs. Renfield, Di Lewis, DS Hathaway, Oxford Police. May we come in?"

She let them into the house, answering their question about her daughter, "We haven't seen Susan for a…well, we had a bit of a falling out."

James saw the photographs on a table in the next room and made a beeline for them, "Sir." He picked up one, bringing it back to Robbie.

The woman saw the concern on both men's faces, "What's all of this about?"

Robbie pointed to the woman in the photo, "Is this Susan, Mrs. Renfield? Because we know her as Charlotte."

"It's Susan Charlotte, but she didn't like Susan."

Robbie pointed to the man in the photo, "But this is Vince Corwin, right, her husband?"

"No, that's John, John Moreau."

Robbie turned back to James all of the pieces finally clicking together. He shoved the photo back at the woman and ran for the door.

James was right behind him, pulling out his mobile to call for armed response. By the time he made it to the car, Robbie already had the engine started, he pulled away from the curb before James even closed the door.

They arrived at the Corwin house just as armed response was preparing to kick in the door. Robbie was the second person into the house. The noise of a crying infant filled the house. He made his way to the nursery to find an empty nursery, with a doll in a crib and tape recording of a crying baby.

James was at the door, "There's no one here and his van is missing. I called the store where he works, he didn't come into work tonight."

"Laura, they've gone after Laura."


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

Robbie drove, faster than he ever had. James steadily attempted to call both Laura and the PC stationed at her home. Neither was answering.

At her home, they found the garden doors wide open. Robbie ran into her home screaming, "Laura, Laura."

James searched through the garden, finding the PC collapsed on the ground. The man roused briefly, clearly groggy. He knelt beside him as he radioed for an ambulance and backup. Robbie joined him, "See if you can get a trace on her mobile."

James watched him walk away, "Did you check on Matty?"

Robbie stopped, "What?"

"He would have been here."

Robbie looked back at the house, how had he forgotten about his own son. "I'll go look." He nodded down at the PC, "See if you can rouse him enough to ask if the lad was here. Maybe she sent him with the nanny. What's her name?"

James nodded toward the house, "Go, I'll call her."

Robbie ran off as James scrolled through his contacts. He was just about to press her contact information when PC Delaney, reached up to him, "They took the boy and Dr. Hobson. It was a man and a woman. The woman was carrying the boy, seemed to think he was her child."

"Was Dr. Hobson alive?"

He shook his head, "I don't know. The man had her slung over his shoulder, she wasn't moving."

"And the boy, was he OK?"

"He was crying, trying to get to Dr. Hobson. The man told him to shut up. That's all I remember before I blacked out again."

James could hear the sirens approaching. He stayed with the PC, calling in a trace for her mobile. Once the paramedics joined him he went in search of Robbie, "PC Delaney confirmed Matty was with them. He said Charlotte Corwin seemed to think Matty was hers."

"And Laura?"

James shook his head, "She wasn't moving. Vince Corwin had her flung over his shoulder."

"We should have trusted her…I should have trusted her."

"There was a lot of evidence, sir. Perhaps we should have excused ourselves from the case."

Robbie shook his head. A small piece of him agreed with James. Perhaps another DI wouldn't have been blinded by his own feelings and realized Laura was in danger sooner. Another DI would have put her somewhere safer.

James phone ringing snapped him from his thoughts, "Hathaway…yep got it." James headed to the car, "Hobson's mobile headed west out of Abbington, 415."

"Harwood Park." Robbie pulled away with squealing tires.

"You don't think Dr. Hobson is the mother, do you?"

He shook his head, "No, I think Dr. Willard was. What I don't understand is how she was able to pretend to be Laura to have the babies?"

James shook his head, "Laura had the mumps right after finals." Robbie looked at him, "Her father took her home. She didn't get her stuff until after everyone else had already left. What if Dr. Willard took Dr. Hobson's ID? They weren't as stringent back then. A school ID would have been sufficient. Dr. Hobson wouldn't have missed it in all of the confusion."

"Dr. Willard must have been pretty cold-hearted. She stayed in touch with Laura, all of these years."

"No, she didn't. Ellen was the link. Dr. Hobson never saw Dr. Willard without Ellen."

"Why do you think they took Laura? Why not just kill her like they did the others?"

James shrugged, "I don't think we can apply any type of rational thinking to them."

"You said the girl, Charlotte, seemed to think Matty was hers…"

He nodded, "I think that's a good thing. It means she will keep him safe."

Robbie stared out the front window as he pushed the pedal closer to the floor.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

Vince Corwin dragged Laura toward the open grave, dropping her beside it. Charlotte followed, carrying a now sleeping Matty gently in her arms. She knelt beside Laura, ripping the tape from her lips.

"Who are you? Why are you doing this to me? What have I done to you?"

"What did you do, you gave us living death?"

Laura looked at the young woman as she stood and walked away, carrying Matty away. "Let my son go, I don't care what you do to me, but don't harm him."

Charlotte looked back at her, "He's not your son, he's mine." She kissed his tousled curls, "It's the one good thing you ever did for us."

Vince Corwin stared down at her, "How long do you think you can hold your breath for?"

Laura begged, "Please."

He knelt beside her, rolling her body into the grave. She stared up at her sleeping child as the first shovels full of dirt fell on her. Her screams tore through the night. She could see Matty start in the young woman's arm, "Mummy, are you ok?"

* * *

Robbie and James stopped in front of the abandoned hospital. Laura's screams filled the air. They took off running in their direction, Robbie screaming her name.

Vince Corwin turned to Charlotte, dropping the shovel. He pulled Matty roughly from her arms then took her hand as he took off running. They headed for the abandoned hospital, a place they knew all too well.

Robbie and James found the grave, Laura crumpled at the bottom covered in dirt. Robbie pushed James toward the grave, "Get her out of there." He took off in pursuit of the twins and his son.

James jumped into the grave, reaching for Laura. She screamed when he touched her. He wiped the dirt from her face, "It's James. You're fine, you're fine."

Relief flooded through her, "Where's Matty?"

"The twins took him. Inspector Lewis, Robbie went after them. Back up is on its way."

"Get me out of here. I need to go after them."

He pulled her too him, wrapping her in his arms, "I will. Robbie will get him back."

* * *

Robbie wandered the halls of the hospital. He could hear them but realized what a disadvantage he was at. They probably knew this place. Finally, he could place their sounds and followed them up the stairs.

The young woman was stood across the stairwell, Matty in her arms. He was struggling against her, trying to get away. Robbie moved to her, his only thought for his son. He never saw Vince Corwin until he was pushed to the edge of the bannister.

"It's not nice being scared is it? To live in fear."

Struggling to hold on, "Is that why you did it?"

"We wanted her to know how it felt. To make her suffer."

"Vince…"

"We gave her enough clues. Her friends, the place she lived, the magnets on the fridge but she wouldn't admit it."

Robbie pushed against the young man, "Laura Hobson isn't your mother." He finally broke the man's grip, "Ligeia Willard was your mother."

Vince looked back at Charlotte, "He's lying."

"She registered your birth in Laura Hobson's name." He pointed at Charlotte, "That's her only child. Give him to me."

Vince attacked, pushing Robbie across the landing.

"Vince, Vince…" He went to her, taking Matty from her.

"We lost three kids inside a year. So we had tests."

Robbie nodded, "That's how you found out you were brother and sister." Vince looked down at Charlotte. He held Matty tightly to him, ignoring his screams. Robbie took several steps toward them, softened his voice, "That wasn't all you discovered though, was it?" He took more steps as the twins stared at one another, "She can't sleep, can she?"

"She should never have had us."

Robbie moved even closer. His eyes finally met Matty's and locked on. They were his eyes, "We can get you help."

Charlotte reached up, stroking Matty's curls, "I'm so tired."

"I know, baby."

Sirens filled the air as Robbie crept ever closer, eyes locked on Matty.

"I'm scared."

Vince shook his head, "Shhh, it's alright." He lowered his head to kiss her.

"Vince."

He looked up at Robbie, wrapping his arm around Charlotte, pulling her to him. "We belong dead."

Robbie leapt forward, grabbing Matty by his pajamas just as Vince Corwin fell backward. Robbie felt the pajamas tear as screams filled the air.


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

 **There were threats. I felt my life was in jeopardy. I hope this makes you happy. Please call off the hitmen/women**

Robbie fell backward landing awkwardly on the floor. The screams echoed through the stairwell as he clutched the small boy to his chest. He sat up, ignoring the twinge of pain in his back. Gently, he pulled the little boy from his chest, "Matty are you ok?"

Matty curled into him, wrapping his arms around Robbie. He nodded his head, "Where's my mummy? Is she OK? The bad people were mean to her."

He kissed the boy's head, "Let's go find her. I left her with a friend of mine."

Oblivious to his own pain, he lifted his son and carefully made his way down the stairs. Outside the hospital, he saw James. James motioned toward an ambulance nodding an assurance that Laura was fine.

He changed his path for the ambulance as James walked nearer to him. Hearing the footsteps the little boy started in Robbie's arms. He looked around wildly, relaxing when he saw James, "Uncle James."

He pushed away from Robbie, reaching desperately for James. James caught him, cuddled him to his body, pressing a gentle kiss to his head. He breathed in the scent of Matty, closing his own eyes in relief. He missed the flash of anger on Robbie's face.

Laura's voice filled the night, "Matty."

James turned to the ambulance to see her pushing away paramedics, climbing from it. She ran to James, Matty turning in his arms. He launched himself into her arms, she almost collapsed from his weight. If not for James' arm at her waist she would have fallen.

He steadied them, guiding her toward the ambulance. The paramedics helped her into the ambulance and let her hold Matty in her lap as they examined him. James climbed in with them, sitting behind Laura, holding them both.

The paramedics tried to expel him from the bus only to be firmly told no by Laura. They closed the doors and within seconds, the ambulance pulled away from the scene.

Robbie was left standing, forgotten, in the middle of the scene. He stared after the ambulance for an unknown period of time. A soft hand on his shoulder, broke the spell, "Robbie…"

He turned, looking down into the face of Chief Inspector Innocent, "Ma'am."

"Good result. I understand Dr. Hobson and her son are going to be fine."

He shook his head, "How do you know ma'am?"

"James called me. They are going to keep them overnight but neither was physically harmed." He nodded, wondering how long he'd been stood in one place, "Robbie, are you ok?"

His hand went to his throat, where Vince Corwin had tried to strangle him, "Just a bit roughed up ma'am. I'll be fine."

"I need you to make a report, you're a victim of all of this. You'll have to give a statement. I've brought in Inspector Marks. Would you rather do it here or at the station?"

"Does it have to be tonight ma'am? I'd liked to check on Dr. Hobson."

Turning, she walked toward the waiting Inspector, "James is with her, he'll take care of her. I'd rather you do this tonight, while it's fresh in your mind."

He followed her thinking that James had been taking care of Laura for an awfully long time. Perhaps that was why she hadn't cared when he didn't call. She'd already found someone to be a father to Matty.

 **Oh wait did I say this was going to make it better...**


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

Matty was asleep in the bed. The doctor's had finally given him something to sleep. She watched him, trying to imagine the damage this might have caused him. She'd been berating herself all night for not sending him to her brother's.

When she'd called him to tell him what happened, she had expected him to be furious with her. Instead, all he'd said was he was on his way. A knock at the door made her look up. James was pushing through, a bag in his hand.

"I brought you some things from home."

She smiled, gratefully, "Thank you, James. For everything."

He shook his head as he handed her the bag, "I didn't do anything. Robbie is the one to thank. Innocent told me what happened. He saved Matty's life."

"How?" He told her the story as it was told to him. At the end, she was crying. "Where is he?"

"I don't know. I got a PC to take me by your house. They've put everything back to rights. The locks will be fixed in the morning. You should be able to go back after that."

She shook her head, "No, I won't be going back. I talked with Michael, we will move out to his house for a while."

"Until you can find a new place?"

She shook her head, "Until I can clear my case load. I've decided it's time to move on. The Royal London has an opening. It means steadier hours and I think I'm going to need that."

"Where will you live?"

"Our parents left us a place. We could never bear to part with it so we've been renting it all of these years. Last week the tenants gave notice. I think it's a sign."

He took her hand, "I'll miss you."

She smiled, squeezing his hand, "London's not so far away."

He laughed, "I know but now I'll be stuck with Rawbones."

She yawned, "You could come with me. I'm sure the Met would be happy to have you."

"You need your rest. I should go."

She shook her head, "Will you stay? Watch over us."

"Always."

She walked to the bed, curling herself around Matty. He cried out in his sleep then settled when he felt her arms. James sat in the chair next to the bed, watching them. Laura reached for his hand. He gave it to her without questioning. Tucking her head into Matty's, she closed her eyes, letting fatigue finally sweep her away.

James stared at them for a long time. This woman had become his family, not one he was looking for but one he desperately needed. As he felt her body relax, he tried to pull his hand away. She tightened her grip on his and he relaxed. Leaning forward, he rested his head on the side of the bed, letting the serenity of the moment pull him away.

At the door stood a man with a huge bouquet of flowers and an impossibly sized stuffed bear. He looked in the window of the door and was heartbroken to see his partner asleep next to the woman he loved and his son.

Dropping the bear and the flowers on the ground, he exited the corridor, then the hospital. He didn't stop until he reached his flat and the unopened bottle of whisky.


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

Laura and Matty were getting a last examination when Michael opened the door. Matty bounced on the bed, "Uncle Michael."

He swept into the room, lifting Matty into the air, "Hey buddy." He crushed him in his arms, kissing his head. Tears filled his eyes as he looked over the boy to his sister.

She nodded, standing to go to him. He lifted one arm, pulling her to him. James had told him what happened earlier that morning. He was horrified at how close he'd come to losing them both.

Matty started pushing at him, "Uncle Michael, you're crushing me."

He loosened his hold, "Sorry pal. I'm just so glad to see you I got carried away."

"Mummy says we are going to live with you for a while. The bad people don't know where you live."

Locking eyes with Laura, he fought back a strangled sob, "No, pal, they don't."

The doctor cleared her throat, "I'm sorry to interrupt. But I need to finish my examination of Matty before you can be released."

Michael set Matty on the bed, "OK, pal, let the doctor do her job. Your mum and I will be just across the room."

Suddenly less sure, his eyes widened, "Not too far…please."

Laura stroked his cheek, "No, my darling, just right there. The sooner the doctor looks at you, the sooner we can go."

He nodded as Michael and Laura stepped away from the bed. In an instant, the doctor had distracted him and Michael pulled her to him, "I thought I'd lost you both."

She buried her face in his chest, "I thought so too." She lingered there for a moment then pulled away, she couldn't afford to break down just yet. "I can't do this right now Michael."

"I know. I've got enough clothes for several weeks along with most of Matty's toys packed in your car. I've called Sarah and she will meet us at my house. James has volunteered to drive your car out. We've got it all taken care of."

She looked back at Matty, "I'm worried he won't get over this."

"Kids are resilient and we will get him all of the help he needs. I heard Ellen woke up."

She nodded against his chest, "Yes, already planning Ligeia's funeral. She really thinks I will attend."

"Perhaps you need to." She looked up at him, distress marring her features, "Closure. She caused all of this, it began with her. And it can end with her as well." She shrugged noncommittally. "Have you heard from the Inspector?"

"No, he hasn't been by."

"James told me what he did."

Laura looked up at him, unsure of what to say. "Dr. Hobson, Matty is all clear. You can take him home."

She smiled, "Great, let's go."

Michael crossed in front her, reaching for Matty. "How about you let me carry you?"

The doctor smiled at him, "Sorry, regulations. He has to ride out in this." She moved the wheelchair closer to the bed.

"What if I give you a ride to the chair? Then I'll run downstairs to get my car."

Matty reached up thrilled to be lifted into the air by his uncle. "Can I pet the horses when we get to your house, Uncle Michael?"

"Of course you can. Just as soon as we get there." He settled Matty in the chair and the doctor motioned to the nurse. As the young woman started to push Matty through the door she turned to Laura, "Dr. Hobson, someone dropped off presents for the two of you during the night."

Laura blinked, "Who?"

The younger woman shrugged, "I don't know, there wasn't a card. They were just in the hallway. I asked one of the orderlies to bring them downstairs."

In the hallway, she took Matty's hand and they traveled the hallway. Downstairs an orderly, dressed in scrubs, was waiting for them. The bear in his arms was larger than Matty, "Is that for me?"

Laura laughed, "Well I'm pretty sure it's not for me."

The nurse stopped the wheelchair knowing she was about to lose her patient. Matty leapt from the chair and launched himself at the bear, "Mummy it's so soft."

The orderly smiled down at the little boy now hugging the over-sized bear. He handed her a large bouquet of blue, almost purple gladiolus flowers. She smiled, knowing instantly who they were from. "Do you know when these were dropped off?"

He shook his head, "No ma'am. They were in the hallway when I came on at 6 this morning."

She nodded, "Thank you."

Michael's car pulled under the porte-cochere. As he got out, Matty started talking, "Look at my bear Uncle Michael. Will there be room for him?"

Michael stared at the bear then glanced to Laura. She mouthed, "Robbie" at him. He nodded, then opened the door, "Sure, pal, you hop into your car seat and I will get your friend in the seat next to you."

Matty climbed into the car and onto his seat, reaching for his seat belt. "Will he require a car seat?"

Michael and Laura both laughed, "No, I think he can sit in the seat just fine."

"Don't forget his seatbelt."

Her car pulled in behind Michael's car. James climbed out of it smiling at the sight. "Michael, was that the smallest bear you could find?"

Being smothered by the bear, Michael grumbled, "Wasn't me, mate."

James walked around to say hello to Matty and looked questioningly at Laura, "Robbie."

"When?"

"During the night. Have you seen him?"

James shook his head, "Not since last night. I can check with Innocent if you want."

She shook her head, "No, I'll text him."

"Are we going or what? I want to pet the horses."

"Matty…"

"Sorry, mummy."

She turned to James, "How will you get back into the city?"

"Sarah offered a ride back. I'll stay for dinner then leave with her."

"I can't thank you enough, James."

He smiled down at her, "You never have to. I just wish we'd figured it out sooner." He looked away for a moment, "I wish I hadn't doubted you."

"James, don't. Believe it or not, I understand. You got there and that's all that matters."

He nodded then helped her into the car, "I'll see you there."

She nodded as he closed the car door. "Seatbelt mummy."

She laughed at Matty, "Yes sir. Uncle Michael, take us home."

As he pulled away, she pulled her mobile from her bag and sent Robbie a text, "Thank you for the lovely gifts. Can we meet?"


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

A buzzing noise disturbed him. He couldn't tell if it was his head or something else. Lifting his head, the pounding started. He reached for his phone, barely able to focus on it. It was a text, from Laura.

"Thank you for the lovely gifts. Can we meet?"

He threw the phone across the room. What was there to meet about? Did she want to tell him in person she was with Hathaway? The thought of their treachery made the bile rise. He pushed himself from the small settee and ran toward the kitchen, just in time to throw up in the sink.

He turned on the faucet, let the cold water wash away the bile before dipping his head to let the water run over it. As the throbbing lessened, he turned off the water, scrubbing his hands over his face and his hair.

Unbuttoning his shirt, he made his way to the bathroom, leaving a trail of clothes on the floor. He started the shower and before the water could even heat he stepped into the stream. The water beat down on him as he leaned into the wall. He wasn't sure when the tears started or even why he was crying. The only thing he knew was he couldn't meet her, not now.

Turning off the water, he dried off quickly, wrapping the towel around his waist. Pulling clothes from his wardrobe he dressed, in haste, before returning to the sitting room to retrieve his mobile. The screen was cracked but it was still functional. He pressed a single number then waited, "Ma'am, I'm due some vacation. I think I will take some."

Jean stared at her phone, "Robbie, are you OK?"

Grabbing his keys then his wallet he opened the front door, "Yes ma'am. This case just hit a little close to home. I need to get some distance."

"Will you be visiting your daughter?"

Starting his car, he put it into gear, "Something like that ma'am. I'll see you in two weeks."

"OK, Robbie. Have you informed James?"

A harsh laugh escaped him, "No, I'll leave that honor to you." He ended the call, rolled his window down and threw the phone out of it.

* * *

James was enjoying a cup of coffee and the early morning silence. He needed to finish writing the last reports for the case and give a statement to Inspector Marks so he wanted this peace to last just a bit longer.

"James?"

He opened his eyes and smiled at Jean Innocent, "Good morning ma'am."

She entered the room, closing the door behind her, "I wanted to let you know Inspector Lewis is taking a few weeks off. He asked me to tell you."

James sat up in his chair, "When did he tell you?"

"Yesterday. I didn't want to disturb you while you were getting Dr. Hobson settled. How is she, by the way?"

"As well as can be expected. Did he say where he was going?"

"No, just that he needed some distance. Is it true Dr. Hobson is leaving us?"

He nodded, "Yes, she is clearing her case load."

Jean lingered, unsure how to ask her next question, "Her little boy, is Inspector Lewis the father?" The look on James' face answered the question for her, "Does he know?"

James nodded, "Yes, on both counts."

"Did he know? I mean before…"

"Ma'am, I'm not really comfortable talking about this. It's not my story to tell."

"I understand. Does he know she's leaving?"

He shrugged, "I have no idea ma'am."

* * *

The pounding on his door matched the pounding in his head. It wasn't the first time someone had come to his door. He'd ignored all of the others and had every intention of ignoring this one as well. Rolling over, he pulled a pillow over his head. Pushing it firmly against his ear, he didn't hear the snick of a key turning in the lock.

"Thank you, I appreciate you letting me in Mrs. Landers. We've been trying to reach the Inspector for days and were starting to get worried."

"Well you are the police ma'am, I guess it's OK."

Jean smiled at her as she looked around the dark, dusty flat. "I'll just take a quick look around. You can go ahead. I promise to lock up on my way out."

The woman looked a bit uncomfortable then decided since the woman was a Chief Super, it was OK. "Could you let me know when you leave?"

Jean touched the woman on the shoulder, gently pressing her toward the door. "I will, don't you worry." She closed the door behind the woman then turned to the flat.

The smell was enough to knock a person down. Thankfully, it wasn't the smell of a decomposing body. Simply the smell of neglect, booze and sweat. She hung her pocket book on the door handle and stepped deeper into the flat. Clothes were strewn everywhere, empty bottles scattered on most of the surfaces.

She flipped on lights as she went, scared what she might step in otherwise. In the sitting room, she found the prone body of Robbie Lewis. She watched him to make sure he was still breathing. Turning on one well shod foot, she made her way to the kitchen.

Quickly she found the necessary ingredients to make coffee and started a fresh pot. She dug through his cabinets finding the biggest bowl she could then filled it with cold water.

Carefully she made her way back to the sitting room to the edge of the settee. Without a second thought, she dumped the cold water over him.

Robbie sat up, spluttering, grabbing his head, "What the hell…"

A cold voice, "Get up, there's plenty more cold water where that came from."

He looked up into the cold face of Jean Innocent, "Why are you here?"

"To save your job." She motioned around the flat, "And from the looks of things, most likely, your liver. Now get up, take a shower and for goodness sake, shave. Coffee will be ready when you are done."

He lay back on the couch, "I have another week off ma'am. Go away."

She reached down grabbing his ear, pulling him up. "Actually, Inspector, you were due back two days ago. I have made all of the excuses I plan on making." She pushed him toward what she presumed was his bedroom, "Shower, shave and brush your teeth. Then we will chat."

He made his way to the bedroom, following her orders blindly. He stood under the heat of the shower wondering how he'd lost more than a week. As he shaved, he found he couldn't meet his own eyes. The last time he'd gone on a bender like this, he'd taken a swing at his own son. All because he'd dared to challenge his drinking. Patrick had left the next week and he hadn't seen him since.

Jean straightened as she waited. She wasn't altogether sure the flat might not need a hazmat team to disinfect it. She collected all of the bottles in a bag and stopped counting when she hit 18 . How could one person have had this much to drink?

Next she picked up the discarded clothing, putting it directly into the machine in the kitchen. Normally, she would have been quite prissy about separating it into lights and darks. However, it all smelled so foul, clean was the best she could think about. Once it was all loaded in she started the machine.

The dishes were next, not that there were many. She filled the sink with water and soap and let them soak. Finally, she made some toast and put together a small tray which she carried into the sitting room. Robbie emerged just as she was pouring a cup of coffee for herself.

She handed it to him, then pushed the toast to him, "Eat, drink then we can talk."

He sat and obediently followed her orders. As he finished the last dregs of his coffee he nodded to her, "Thanks, Ma'am."

"Don't thank me yet. I've still half a mind to report you and let admin take care of you." Panic filled his eyes, If she did that, there was a better than average chance he might lose his pension. She caught his panic filled look and nodded, "Good to know there is still some part of the Robbie Lewis I know in there. Do you care to explain this?"

He shook his head, "It's personal ma'am."

She rolled her eyes, "Lots of men have children out of wedlock; it's not the end of the world."

"Did Hathaway tell you?"

She waved off his comment, "He confirmed what I already suspected. I gathered from his reticence you aren't involved in the child's life."

He shook his head, embarrassed by his own failings, "No, I thought it best to stay away. And I think the last two weeks are proof of that."

"You disappoint me Robbie Lewis." She stood, "There are many things about you which annoy me no end. But I've never suspected you were a coward."

"Not a coward ma'am, just a drunk."

"Is that what you think?"

"It's not the first time I've fallen into a bottle ma'am."

She nodded, "I'm well aware of that Inspector. But as long as you work for me it damned well better be your last." Picking up the tray, she carried it into the kitchen and set it on the counter. "I've put all of your clothes onto wash and cleared up the bottles." She looked at him pointedly, "All of them. I expect you in the office at eight in the morning. If anyone should ask, you had a stomach virus and kindly decided to stay at home rather than risk infecting us all."

He started to say something and she waved him off, "If you are not there, I will process your retirement paperwork and you will be out before you can open a bottle. It's your choice Inspector. This is your only strike with me."

He nodded, "Understood ma'am."

She made her way to the door lifting her pocket book with one hand and the heavy garbage bag with the other. "Until tomorrow, Inspector."


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

 **For the logged in reviewers, I am not ignoring you. FF is messed up and won't let me respond to them. So here is your thank you. Hopefully, FF will fix its issues and I will be able to respond again soon. Hopefully, fingers crossed.**

 **To the guest reviewers, these are not the same characters we know and love from the show. This is an alternate universe where their relationship didn't develop at the snail's pace we saw over the course of 7 series. Laura didn't welcome him back with open arms then patiently move him along. She had a child to protect. I am very sorry that you don't like my characterization of them but this isn't the Lewis we know. This is a dark, twisty version where things went slightly askew. I opted to explore something a bit different because it intrigued me. All of my stories have angst in them and they almost always go M.**

 **The series never explored the darker emotional aspects of the characters. Across 7 (now 8 series), we rarely saw an exploration of any of the characters. I like to fill in those gaps. Sometimes it is fun and fluffy and sometimes, it is a hot mess of emotions of flawed characters who, let's be honest, are crappy communicators on the best of days. Imagine how horrible they would be with the addition of a child to the mix.**

* * *

Laura was boxing the last of the things from her office. Technically, she had two more days but she wanted all of her items to be able to go with the movers the next day.

A soft tap at her door, made her turn around, "I guess this makes it real."

She smiled, "It was always real, James."

He shrugged, "Perhaps, but I thought…you might change your mind."

"No, James. There's nothing left for me here."

"Have you heard from him?"

She shook her head, "Have you?"

"No, Innocent says he has a stomach virus."

She raised her eyebrow, "Do you think he's OK?"

"I don't know, he's not answering his phone. I tried going by, he didn't answer the door."

"Maybe he went to visit Lyn."

Another shrug, "Maybe. Anyone around here throwing you a leaving party?"

She laughed, "Why, are you volunteering for the job?"

"I'll have you know I throw a good party."

"I've been to your flat, James. A bottle of whisky and a package of crisps does not a party make."

"Perhaps just the three of us then. A quiet dinner and a walk in the park."

She nodded, "Sounds more like it."

He motioned to the door, "I better get on with it. Rumor has it the Inspector is returning today."

"I'm short staffed this week. If you can manage not to have any murders; that would be great."

Waving over his shoulder he laughed, "I'll work on that."

* * *

Robbie was sitting at his desk when James returned. "Good morning, sir. Welcome back."

"Hmmm."

"Have you fully recovered from your virus?"

Robbie looked up, momentarily confused, "Yeah."

"Did you visit Lyn during your time off?"

"I'm not really sure how that's your business Sergeant."

James took a step back, "Sorry, just making conversation. Can I get you anything?"

Going back to his computer screen, he muttered, "No, I don't need anything from you."

James settled behind his desk, curious as to what was wrong with Robbie. He knew he'd promised to try to keep murder at bay but at this moment he desperately wanted a nice, dead body to contend with.

* * *

It had been a long, slow day. James had cleared away a mountain of paperwork in absolute silence. Any attempts at conversation had been promptly shut down. An offer for lunch had gone unanswered. At this point, he was merely counting the minutes until he could call it a day.

He was returning from a cigarette break when Jean pulled him into her office. "How has the Inspector been today?"

"Taciturn."

"Well that must be quite upheaving for you as that is generally your demeanor. Is there trouble in paradise?"

James simply stared at her, "Why don't you tell me? I sense this isn't a social call."

Taking off her glasses, she fixed him with a steely glare. "He's asked to be assigned a new sergeant. Any thoughts on why that might be?"

"I have no bloody idea. I haven't seen nor heard from the man since Laura and Matty were taken. He hasn't bothered to respond to her or me in over two weeks. So you tell me, why does he want a new sergeant?"

She watched his mini rant and realized he really was clueless, "All he said was he didn't feel there was the trust required for a partnership such as yours."

James gaped at her. His mouth opening and closing, unable to put words in any semblance of an order. Finally, he gave up and walked out. "James, I've denied the request for now." He stopped at the door, "I need you to keep an eye on him. Report back to me if you sense anything amiss."

"Where did he go?"

Sensing this was not a time to be coy, she sighed, "Bottom of a whisky bottle."

"There's no need to deny the request. We'll work out the rest of this week and then you can reassign me."

"No, James. I don't know what's caused this but I won't sweep it under the rug. Someone needs to keep an eye on him and with Dr. Hobson leaving I'm afraid that falls to you."

"And if I choose to leave?"

She held her breath. She'd been afraid it would come to this, "Then the Met will be lucky to have you. I know a few people, I'll be happy to make some calls." She could see his hand tighten on the doorframe, "James, don't fall in love with her."

He turned to her, anger flaring deep within him. "I already love her. But I am not in love with her. She and Matty and her brother are all of the family I have. It's bad enough that miserable sod has driven her away. Now he has the nerve to say he can't trust me."

She nodded, "Family comes in the oddest of places."

"I was never looking for it."

"But it found you." He nodded, fighting tears. "Perhaps the Inspector is jealous."

"Of what?"

"I've seen you with them. It's quite the familial bond. Someone who's not quite sure of his place in the world might misinterpret your closeness."

* * *

James had been sitting at his desk since his conversation with Jean. He'd returned to find Robbie gone, no note. He couldn't believe Robbie had asked to have him reassigned.

"Sergeant, are you still on duty?"

He looked up from his desk, "Might as well be, why?"

"There's a body, Lady Matilda's."

Pushing himself up, "Call Inspector Lewis."

"I tried sir, his mobile has been disconnected."

"I'll go round and get him. Can you call Dr. Hobson?"

The PC nodded, "Crappy way for her to end her tenure here."

Grabbing his jacket and shrugging into it, "You have no idea."

* * *

Robbie walked around the store adding a few things to his basket. None of the items were what he really wanted but he knew how serious Innocent was. He'd have to stay on the straight and narrow for a few weeks, make her think he was heeding her caution.

As he turned the corner for the checkout, he saw the last person he'd wanted to see. "Something tells me you are not here for the two for one dandelion and burdock."

James trying to control his anger took the basket and relayed the facts, "Suspicious death, Lady Matilda's college." He put the basket with the others as he headed for the door.

"Lady Matilda's?"

"Last all female college in Oxford, just voted to go mixed."

Annoyed at James in general and now his smug tone, "I know what it is. So…"

"Holding a Gaudy. The information's a bit sketchy, but one of the guests has been found dead." At his car, James opened the door, "You can follow me." Without further interaction, he sat, closed the door and started his car.

Robbie stared at him for a moment. Innocent must have given James the news. It was what he wanted but a small part of him couldn't help but mourn the closeness he'd once had with James.

* * *

Arriving at the college, he was swept back in time. This place would always be irrevocably tied to when he lost Val. He struggled, trying to push the thoughts away. Saw James walk toward the scene, asking for details. He tried to focus on the sound of James' voice, anything that would keep his demons at bay.

"Sir?"

James' voice broke through his reverie and he moved towards it. "Do we know who she was?"

"Poppy Toynton, 32, alumna. Worked here as a development officer. Parents from Whitby. Oh, she shared a house with one of the dons from here, a Diana Ellerby, in Bicester. The accommodations been given over to the guests for the weekend."

They rounded the corner to the stairwell. Laura looked up. It was the first time she'd seen Robbie in almost three weeks. He'd never responded to her texts. She didn't even know if he knew she was leaving. "Boys."

Robbie climbed the stairs. He could do this, keep things strictly professional. She'd made her choice and it wasn't him. "Doctor, what've we got?"

She looked askance at him, trying to remember the last time he'd called her doctor at a scene. Annoyance clouded her voice, "I can't speak for you, obviously, but what I've got is indigestion after another spoilt supper." She looked down at the body, trying to keep the hurt and anger from her voice, "What she's got, at first glance anyway, appears to be a broken neck."

"From the fall?"

She walked past him, needing to put some distance between them, "Too early to say if it was a fall. According to uniform, there are signs of a break-in upstairs. Scene of the crime are taking a look now."

Kneeling next to the body, he looked around, "What time was she found?"

James, standing next to Laura on the lower level, answered, "Senior Porter called it in about an hour and a half ago."

Removing her gloves, Laura nodded in confirmation, "That'd agree with time of death between 9:00 and 10:00."

He looked down at them, side by side, a united front. "But it was the porter that found her, was it?"

Looking up at him, James continued, "No, it was one of the first year students, doubling up as a waitress tonight for a bit of pin money." He pulled his notebook from his pocket, "Samantha Coyle."

Robbie looked around one last time then went in search of the witness.

"Sir, did you want me to come with you?"

"No, I've no need of you Sergeant."

 **Author's note: This will be the last episode I tie to a chapter. At the conclusion of Old, Unhappy Far Off Things, we will leave Lewis land and delve into the darker recesses of my mind. That should be scary.**


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

Laura stared up at James, shocked at Robbie's comment. She waited until he was out of sight, "What was that all about?"

James shrugged, "I don't know. Innocent informed me earlier he wants a new sergeant."

"That can't be right?"

"Says there isn't enough trust for a partnership such as ours."

Laura picked up her case, started walking toward her car, "Trust?"

They started walking, in perfect step, "Innocent thinks he might be jealous."

Laura looked at him skeptically, "Jealous of what?"

"Our relationship."

"Surely he doesn't think…"

"Apparently he spent his two weeks at the bottom of a whisky bottle. All sorts of bad ideas swirling down there."

Laura handed a few items to the SOCOs then turned back to James. "I can't help him, James. I know what you are hinting at but my whole focus is on Matty. Robbie is a grown man, he needs to figure out how to rescue himself."

He nodded, knew it had been a long shot, "You all done?"

Laura paused for a moment, trying to determine if he was taking a new angle or just inquiring. "For now, PM is eight o'clock sharp."

James nodded acknowledging what she'd said then paused for a moment before pressing forward, "Is there anything I should know?"

Not sure where he was headed with his questioning, she asked brusquely, "Such as?"

James looked at her somewhat perplexed by her tone, "With himself. Besides his general annoyance with me, when I first mentioned this place he got very uh, beady."

Laura, surprised James had given up his line of inquiry, relaxed and sighed "Well there was a young woman attacked here, nine, ten years ago. A sister of one of the undergrads, uh. Chloe something, Robbie's case."

James looked at her even more confused, "What happened?"

Laura looked down at her shoes, "A couple of days into the investigation his wife got killed."

He stopped walking, stunned, "Oh."

Laura stopped with him and looked up at him, more softly than before, "So keep an eye, eh?"

He stopped walking, "You and Innocent. Is that all I'm good for?" She turned back to him, "Keeping an eye on the wayward Inspector?"

"No, James, it was unfair of me to ask. I'm sorry." She took a step to him, her hand reaching for his arm, caressing it lightly. "Are you OK?"

"I'm angry. We've been through a lot, him and me. Why wouldn't he just tell me?"

"I'm probably not the best person to ask that question."

He covered her hand with his, "How have you held out hope, for so long?"

"Matty…and I loved him."

"Does he know?"

"Of course not, I don't think I really knew until recently." She shook her head, "It doesn't matter now. There's too much history. I'll never be able to separate the last few months from how I feel about him."

"Even for Matty?"

She smiled, "James, I want him to know Matty but I won't force it. And just because he knows Matty doesn't mean I have to have a relationship with him."

James jerked his head toward the college, "I need to get back before he adds another reason he doesn't want to be my partner to his list."

She grabbed his arm again, squeezing it, "I know it's not fair to ask. But keep an eye on him."

"I always do."


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

The case wasn't moving along. Difficult witnesses revealing half-truths and Robbie doing his own investigations. It felt much like it had when they'd first been partnered. James was stunned when Robbie suggested they stop at the White Horse.

As Robbie sat at a table, brooding, James got their pints. He set Robbie's in front of him then sat beside him, thinking the conversation they needed to have might be easier if they weren't looking at one another.

They booth took deep sips from their pints then James took a deep breath and dove into the conversation, "Forgive me for asking, and tell me if it's none of my business, but what's the interest in the Chloe Brooks case?"

Robbie cringed internally, expecting James to ask about his request. The question about the case was a surprise but he supposed not completely, "Laura Hobson told you."

Hearing the anger in Robbie's voice he decided to try a touch of levity, "Well, I had to get the thumbscrews out. So?"

This question he could answers, would answer. "Just covering all angles."

"Well, is there one? Beyond coincidence? I mean, I know it has some…weight for you personally, but it wasn't murder."

"Might as well have been. Fifteen year old kid left in a coma."

James sighed, knowing he wasn't going to make any headway. Perhaps the least he could do was help, "What was she doing there?"

"She'd come up to Oxford to see her sister for the weekend. There was a party, a masked ball. It's all in the files."

James' phone rings, "Yeah. Where? Okay, we're on our way. We've got a trace on Freya Carlisle's mobile." James stood ready to go.

"I felt at the time there was something… I don't know, something wasn't right. I should've done something, said something."

If this was his last case with Robbie, he didn't want to get bogged down in Robbie's history. "Oughtn't we to be concentrating on the case at hand, sir? The one in the present, in the here and now?"

"I don't like leaving a job half done."

"You didn't; it was done."

Robbie was getting angrier, "Yeah, not by me."

"Is that what this is then? The Robbie Lewis show? You're so damned certain no one can do it better."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

James stood, suddenly he didn't need to have this conversation, not now, not ever. Perhaps Laura had the better measure of the man. "I'll go chase down this lead. I'll see you at the station."

* * *

Robbie had gone for a walk after James' tirade. There had only been a few times they'd disagreed. They'd always moved on, a few words here or there and then things would smooth out. If Innocent had told him about the request, this would not be one of those times.

He'd read her email, denying his request a dozen times. He was going to have to work through his issues. Work through them or make James so miserable he requested the change. All Robbie knew, he wouldn't be able to work with James day to day knowing about his relationship with Laura.

The buzzing from his pocket made him stop walking. He pulled out the mobile, almost sad he'd given his new number to anyone. " _Found some of the missing items. At the station."_

James wasn't in the office when he returned to the station. He flipped casually through the Chloe Brooks file, waiting. He didn't have to wait long.

"Last night's haul" James dropped the evidence bag on his desk. "Dumped off a bridge outside of Abingdon."

Robbie picked up the bag, looking at the meager contents, "This all of it?"

"Yeah, apart from the jewelry. Might have gone in the river?" At Robbie's skeptical look, James offered another opinion, "Well, maybe he panicked, realized what he'd done, and decided to offload the spoils." He looked up at Robbie, "It's a scenario."

"All right, here's another. Ten years ago, a girl's attacked, and a decade later, certain people who were there the night of the attack are reunited in the very place where it happens and hours later one of them's dead." Robbie shook his head, pointing at the bag on James' desk, "Now you don't believe that this was a robbery gone wrong any more than I do." He turned away from James, ready to leave, "See you in the morning."

James watched him leave, his eyes coming to rest on the box on Robbie's desk. It was a plausible theory. Perhaps there was something to it. He walked to the desk and started digging through the box.

* * *

Jean stood in the doorway, watching James. He was completely oblivious to her presence. Robbie approached. She shook her head, "I don't think he's been home."

Robbie looked into the office, shocked at what James had done. He stepped into the room, "What's…"

"Shh…" James turned to fuss at whomever was interrupting him. Seeing it was Robbie he removed his earbuds and stood, "Sorry sir, I just wanted to get the last ones in order."

"In order of what?"

"It would have been easier if I had the lid of the box, obviously."

Robbie was confused, there was a lid for the evidence box, "What Box?"

"Jigsaw box."

Jean, more confused than when she had entered the office, turned to leave. "I think I'll leave you to it."

Nodding at the board, Robbie watched James, "And for those of us whose MENSA applications came back labeled return to sender?"

James pointed at the board, "40 or 50 people taking photos of the same event over one evening."

"Right?"

"If you look at one set of photos, you're going to have stonking great gaps. But what one person misses…"

"Someone else might have covered."

"So a few of the sets have gone missing in the interim, but at least a third are time coded. This gives us way points. The rest you just have to extrapolate."

"Based on what?"

"Light levels, level of drink in people's glasses. Who's next to who, who's doing what. It would be easy if I knew who was wearing what. But that's doable. We just get that, shove it in the computer and we're in." Robbie scoffs, James looks back at him, "What?"

Shaking his head, "No, no, it's good. It's just. All this? Why?"

James looked away, asking himself the same question. After all this time, Robbie still didn't understand that he was James' family too. "Well you thought something wasn't right."

Robbie felt as if he'd been gut punched. After all he'd done to James, the way he'd treated him and still the lad was helping him. "Come on, get your coat."

"Where are we going?"

"To see an old mate."


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

They'd made some progress on the case but were still struggling through a few odds and ends. James having sensed Robbie's change of mood decided to risk seeing how far the mood had changed, "Work it through with a pint."

Robbie looked up, slightly embarrassed, "Ahh…"

He was trying to figure out what to say when he was saved, "Fit, Rob."

He nodded, unsure what James would read into the situation, unsure what he wanted James to read into the situation. He watched Alison sit in the chair across from his desk. She smiled at them both, "They're open, you know. Valuable drinking time you're wasting."

He looked up at James, "Join us, James."

Alison chimed in, "Yeah, absolutely. More the merrier."

James shook his head, "No, you're all right. I've got one or two leads to follow up."

He looked at Robbie, disappointed. The man couldn't see fit to call the mother of his child but he could go out with a former sergeant in the middle of a case. Alison questioned him, "This the Toynton case?"

James looked back at her, "Mmm."

"There's been another they're saying on the radio."

Robbie looked back at James, curious as to his reason for suddenly skipping out on a pint, "What leads are these?"

"It's just one or two things. I'll talk to you about them tomorrow."

Robbie nodded. He'd felt James' mood shift and didn't know why. He smiled at Alison as James walked away, a mystery for another day. "You ready?"

She stood, smiling at him, "Yeah."

* * *

They'd been drinking for most of the night. Still mindful of Innocent's warning he alternated between a pint and water. He was puzzled by her. Puzzled as to why she was here with him, puzzled as to why she wasn't still on the force.

"Out of everyone, I thought you'd have gone the distance, taken your Inspector's."

She shook her head, looking at him sadly. "Well, I woke up one morning and my face didn't fit anymore. It was made clear I wasn't going to go any further. There'd been a complaint. Some girl in the canteen, of all places. Civilian." She took a deep sip from her glass. And she said I'd said something. Racial, which I hadn't. But I mean, even if I had, it wouldn't have been anything. Just, you know, a bit of banter between colleagues. And then suddenly they're gonna bust me down to DC."

Robbie was somewhat shocked by her admission. He was almost certain he wasn't getting the whole story but he had no way to refute her claims, he hadn't been there. "Sounds a bit harsh."

"And I thought sod ya. I've always played a straight bat, you know. And for what?" She paused then took a deep breath, recognizing she had turned him off and she needed information, "But enough about me. How are you getting on with Lady Matilda's thing?"

Robbie grunted, no plans on sharing. He took a drink of his beer, stalling for time. She finished her glass then dug through her pocketbook, "Look, I'll get another round and you and fill me in. How's that?"

He nodded, why not share with her. He trusted her and he would like another drink, "Go on, then."

"Like old times."

He watched her walk away, thinking about old times. He missed those days, he missed everything about those days.

They drank for another hour when Alison suggested they leave. As they were crossing the bridge she flung her arm around his back, "Your new boy seems decent enough. Hathaway, is it?"

"James. Yeah, he's a good lad." Robbie smiled to himself as he realized how much he meant the sentiment. Maybe he was the right person for Laura, for Matty.

She bumped her hip into him, "Yeah, no…no Ali McLennan though, eh?"

He laughed, "Who is?"

Putting her arm around him again, she curled into him. "You know, one thing I've always wanted to ask. All those late nights and long observations..." They stopped at the foot of the bridge, coming to face one another. She tapped at his chest, "How come you never tried it on?"

"I was married."

She shook her head, "Yeah, well, so were many that did."

"I don't know about them. I loved me wife."

"Simple as that. And now? Got anyone?"

His mind raced, this was a question that wasn't simple. "Come on, who'd have me?"

"Plenty."

He thought about Laura, and his wasted chance. "I'm too set in me ways, to, I don't know, start over. Sometimes I think it'd be nice, but…"

"You shouldn't be alone. You're one of the good guys, Rob."

She pushed up and kissed him. He didn't know how to respond. The last person who'd kissed him had been a witness. And before that, it had been Laura. Neither this kiss nor the one from the witness meant anything. He didn't feel anything. With Laura, he'd felt something instantly, had moved to deepen that kiss.

Allison could tell he wasn't going to respond and pulled back. "Yeah, we should do this again. No strings. You know, just two old coppers out for a pint now and then."

He nodded, "I'd like that." He said the words but knew he had no intention of ever calling her.

"Well you've got my number."

He watched her walk away. The kiss had been meaningless but it did cement one thought in his mind. He needed to have a conversation with Laura. Even if she was with James now, he wouldn't go down without a fight.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

The ringing phone woke him from a restless sleep. It had been filled with images of Laura with James. All of those dreams he'd had of Laura and Matty with a faceless man had changed. Now it was James holding Matty's hand, helping Laura swing him into the air.

He fumbled for the phone desperately trying to clear his head of the images. "Yeah."

"Sorry to disturb you so early, sir."

"What is it, James?"

"It's not good news, sir. Alison McLennan was found dead this morning." Robbie's mind raced. What if he'd brought her home with him or gone home with her? Would she still be alive? "Sir, are you there?"

"Where are you James?"

"At her workshop, sir."

"I'm on my way.

* * *

Robbie walked up and grumpily said to James. "Where?"

James motioned to the building and Robbie walked through the door. As he walked towards the body Laura stood and went to him. "Robbie, I wouldn't. It's not pretty."

Anger flared at her attempt to protect him. Who was she to care? "Show me." He missed the concern on her face as she stepped aside letting him see the body. He looked at the broken body of the woman he had spent the evening with the night before. A new set of emotions from the night before came rushing back. Rather than thinking about how her kiss hadn't stirred anything within him, he thought about how relaxed he'd been with her. How good it had felt to let go and laugh and reminisce. She had been so alive and familiar and uncomplicated. Suddenly, he wished that had been enough. He scratched his head. "When?"

Laura's voice was soft, gentle, "Early hours, between 2 and 4. She wouldn't have known much about it, after the first, if that's any comfort."

Robbie looked a few seconds more and then turned away. Once again his mind flashed to the evening before, to the moment she kissed him. The offer had been there. She'd said he shouldn't be alone before she kissed him. He was tired of being alone. She would have been comforting, accepting, unchallenging. She wouldn't have tried to change him.

Laura watched him before following. She was unsure of what was going through his head but he seemed lost, broken. She touched his arm. He looked down at her and she could see confusion on his face. "I only saw her last night. We went for a drink."

Laura paused for a moment taken aback. He had been with the dead woman last night. She knew he had known the woman but didn't realize they were in touch, that they were seeing each other. She didn't realize he'd moved on. She fell back a step, needing distance, "You were…"

Suddenly the idea of an uncomplicated relationship with Alison seemed exactly what he needed. "Could have been. Who knows?" He looked back towards the body wishing he hadn't seen it. He thought about how Laura had tried to stop him, tried to protect him. Even now, after everything, she still protected him, "I'm sorry if I was uh…"

She accepted his apology figuring it was time one of them was the adult, "Brusque."

He smiled sadly. Once again, she excused him "Oh I was thinking more rude."

She took a deep breath, he'd just lost someone. With a sad smile, she shrugged it off, "You're entitled."

He shook his head, when would she stop making excuses for him. "No, not with you." He stared at her angry at himself for having been unkind again. All thoughts of an uncomplicated relationship gone from his mind. She was what he wanted, no matter how messy it might be.

* * *

Laura walked towards her car and saw James waiting. She looked up to ask how Robbie was doing just as Robbie walked toward them. James nodded towards Robbie. He already knew Robbie was going to ask her to dinner. With a simple smile he let her know it was OK to skip their plans, "See you later."

James hadn't needed to say anything. She knew he was giving her permission to go with Robbie, to say goodbye. She smiled at Robbie and decided to make him laugh, or at least cringe, "Hot work eh." He groaned at the bad joke as he fell in step beside her. With a quick look down, she made the overture, "Fancy a drink."

Robbie looked at her, grateful she had suggested something, "Make it dinner and I'm paying. I owe you one."

She shook her head. "No you don't"

He nodded at her as she walked away. "8 o'clock The Turl?"

She looked back at him, smiled sadly and nodded.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

He'd showered, shaved, changed his shirt and tie twice and was debating having a wee nip to settle his nerves. He was staring at the bottle, think one small glass couldn't hurt. Reaching for a glass with one hand, he thumbed off the top with his other. Tipping the bottle, he splashed a finger into the glass, then another, then a third.

The smoky scent filled the air, every nerve in his body tensed in anticipation. He raised the glass to his lips then paused. Before he could second guess himself, he poured the liquid down the drain. He couldn't do it. He couldn't go to her with whisky on his breath.

* * *

Laura was rummaging through boxes, trying to find something to wear. The problem with living out of a suitcase was you could never find anything. She wanted to look nice but not too nice. Finally pulling a light blue dress and a white sweater from the case she dressed quickly.

A few minutes in front of the mirror and she was ready to go. She stared at herself in the mirror. It seemed she'd aged 10 years in the last month. A new start was what she desperately needed. A month off before she started her new job would help her. She could get Matty settled, their home put to rights, perhaps find a small amount of peace.

Her door was flung open and Matty came flying into the room, "Mummy, you didn't tell me Uncle James was coming over."

Smiling at his enthusiasm, wishing he could always be this happy, she pulled him to her. "I didn't know, is he downstairs?"

Pushing away he looked at her curiously, "Why are you all dressed up? Uncle James only has jeans and a jumper on."

"Remember? Mummy is having dinner with a friend. It's at a nice restaurant. I wish I could be in jeans and a jumper."

A moment of fear crossed his face, "You'll be back before I go to bed, won't you mummy?"

Her heart stopped, "It's unlikely. But Uncle Michael and Uncle James will be here until I get back."

"Will they tuck me in?"

"Of course, my love." She knelt to be eye to eye with him, "And when I get home, I will come tuck you in as well."

"I don't like when you aren't home at night."

"I know, love. And after tonight, I won't have to be away at night. When we move to London, mummy will be home every night."

"Will Uncle James be there?"

"He's going with us to help us settle. But then he's coming back to Oxford."

"Can't he come live with us?"

She smiled, "James has his own life here."

"But aren't I part of his life?"

"Of course you are angel. And James will come visit us regularly. Just because we don't live in the same city doesn't mean James won't always be a part of your life." Matty looked down. Laura placed her finger under his chin, lifting it so he was looking at her. "And when he comes to visit, it will likely be for an entire weekend."

His lips twirked up a bit, "Do you think Uncle James will sleep in my room?"

Laura laughed at the mental picture of James sleeping in Matty's race car bed, "I think that's an excellent question to ask Uncle James." She stood, offering her hand to Matty, "Walk me downstairs?"

He took her hand, "You look really pretty, mummy."


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

Robbie was early to the restaurant. He'd ordered an orange juice as he waited, wanting to make sure she knew he wasn't drinking. He'd chosen a table so he'd be able to watch for her arrival. At five minutes past eight, he began to get worried, perhaps she'd changed her mind.

He was just about to call her when she came rushing in the door. Her cheeks were flushed, she was beautiful. He wished he'd thought to stop for flowers, wished he had something more than himself at the table. As she approached, he stood, bumping the table, sloshing his juice.

"Robbie, I'm sorry I'm late, traffic."

He pulled out her chair, "I wouldn't have expected there to be much traffic from your place."

She looked down as she placed her napkin in her lap, "I wasn't coming from my place." Robbie settled in his seat, his heart sinking, was she coming from James' place? "We've been staying with my brother. He's near Marlow."

He nodded, "Oh, I didn't know. When are you going back to your house?"

She took a deep breath, "I'm not."

"You've sold your house? Have you found somewhere else to live?"

"You don't know"

"Don't know what, Laura?"

"Today was my last day, Robbie."

He looked at her curiously, "Your last day at the house?"

She reached for him, then stopped herself, "No, Robbie. Today was my last day in Oxford."

"Are you moving closer to your brother?"

Tears filled her eyes, why was he making this so hard? "No, Matty and I are moving to London."

"London? Why?"

"I need a change. Matty needs me to be home more."

He swallowed, needing to know but afraid to ask, "How is he?"

She shrugged, "As good as can be expected. He was part of the reason I was late. He doesn't like me to be gone at night."

"And you? How are you?"

She laughed, a shrill, bitter sound, "Tired. Matty hasn't been sleeping through the night and I haven't been sleeping at all."

He placed both hands on the table, "How do you feel about getting out of here?"

A single tear fell down her cheek, "I'd like that."

He dropped a few notes on the table to cover his drink, then helped her from her chair. They collected their coats then walked out of the restaurant. His hand settled on her lower back as they fell into step.

"You're taking this awfully well."

He smiled, cupping his hand to her back, "I think it's the least I owe you."

She shook her head, "You don't owe me anything Robbie. Truth told, I owe you an apology. I should have told you as soon as I found out."

He stopped walking, taking her elbow, pulling her to face him. "No, you made the right decision. I may not like it but I can't say it was wrong. I was a mess."

"I'm sorry, Robbie."

"Why? For protecting our son, for being an amazing mother…" His hand moved up, softly caressing her cheek, "For being an amazing friend?"

"Don't…"

"Don't what, Laura?"

"Don't do this. I can't do this."

"I know. Just promise me, you'll let me know when you are ready to do this."

"Why now?"

"Because someone needs to be strong for you. Let it be me, Laura?" He brushed a tear from her cheek, "I know I pushed you away and I know you're with James now but I will always be here for you."

She took a step back, "What do you mean, I'm with James?"

"I know you are together, a couple, I understand. But I thought it only fair that you know I'm ready. I'm ready to be all you need, all Matty needs."

"Is that what this is about? You're jealous of James?"

She turned, walking back towards her car. He ran after her, grabbing her arm, "I thought this is what you wanted, Laura. You wanted us to be a couple, me to be a father to Matty."

Pulling her arm free, she stared up him, her face filled with all of the anger she hadn't been able to express over the past year. "I do." She shook her head, "I did. But I wanted you to want those things because you wanted to be with us. Not because of schoolyard jealousy."

He reached for her, was stunned when she pulled further away. "Laura, it's not like that." At her incredulous look, he tried to calm himself, "I know I am messing this up. And you have every right to be angry with me and not to trust me."

Bitter laughter escaped her, "Well it's good of you to tell me how I should feel. But where have you been for the last six months. I gave you a chance Robbie. I gave you a chance to be with me and even when you rejected me, I gave you a chance to know Matty. You rejected that too. And over the last two weeks, I reached out to you, I don't know how many times. And where were you? At the bottom of a bottle." His horrified look, pushed her forward, "That's right Robbie. I know. Then your new love interest is killed and suddenly here you are saying what you think I've needed to here. But not because you mean it, but because you're jealous that I might have found some modicum of happiness with someone else."

"That's not why I'm here, Laura." She scoffed in disbelief and he continued, "Yes, Alison made me realize a few things but not because of her death. The night before her death she kissed me. I didn't feel anything. And I realized the last time I felt anything about another woman was the night I spent with you. I want that again, Laura. I want to feel alive again and it's you, it's always been you."

She shook her head, tears streaming down her face, "It's too little too late Robbie. A year ago, even six months ago it might have been enough. But now, it's all I can do to keep my head above water. I have to put all of my energy into Matty. I can't be worried about when is the next time you fall off the wagon. I'm sorry, Robbie. Please just let me go."

"I'm not drinking, Laura."

"When's the last time you had a drink, Robbie?"

"The night Ali died."

"When's the last time you wanted a drink?"

He thought back to pouring the drink at his flat earlier. "Earlier, before I came to meet you. But I poured it out."

"I'm glad you poured it out but it's too fresh. My whole life is about Matty. I have to put all of my energy into him."

"Can I at least call you? After you move?"

She closed her eyes, thinking how easy it would be just to say yes. "Give us a few months."

It hurt, but he knew it was fair. "Can I ask one favor?"

Opening her eyes, she nodded, "Yes."

"Can I have a picture of him?" Reaching into her purse, she pulled out several, handing them to him. He took them, flipping through them. He realized they covered most of his life. "Thank you."

There was grief etched on her face. She looked tired and yet was no less beautiful for it. Taking a tentative step forward, he slipped the photos into his jacket pocket. When she didn't move away, he took another step, reaching for her. His hand softly touched her cheek, thumbing away the tears.

As her eyes slid closed, he pulled her into his arms. Joy filled his heart when he felt her hands on his back. He held her, felt her shatter against him as all of the anger and fear of the past month finally found its release. There were no words he could say, all he could do was hold her.

He didn't know how long they stood there. He would have held her forever if she'd let him. Eventually, her wracking sobs ceased, her breathing settled and she pushed away from him. He pulled her to him for one, brief second, placing a tender kiss to her temple.

"I have to get home."

He let her go, resisted the urge to pull her to him and kiss her. "I understand."

She turned to walk away then paused, looking back at him over her shoulder. "I hope you call."

He watched her walk away, then followed at a distance. There was an overwhelming urge to make sure she made it safely to her car. At the edge of the carpark he stopped. Not wanting her to think he was following. As if feeling his stare, she turned, smiled sadly and waved. Without anything further, she climbed into her car and drove away.

He walked to his car, parked in the other direction, and drove home. Inside his home, he collected all of the bottles and emptied their contents down the drain. Bagging the bottles he placed the bag by the door to be thrown out in the morning.

Taking the photos of Matty from his pocket he placed them on his nightstand. He undressed and readied himself for bed. Settling into bed he picked up the photos, flipping through them. Propping them up on his nightstand, he turned out the light and lay so he was looking at the photos. Within minutes, he was asleep. It was the first time in months he'd fallen asleep sober.


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

 **Five months later**

Laura walked down the street, enjoying the pleasantly warm weather. She'd thought when she left Oxford she would miss forensic work. And, at first, she did. Now, she liked the work she was doing, the people she worked with and, most importantly, being home at a decent hour.

Letting herself into her home, she smiled when she heard Matty's chatter from the kitchen. She hung her things on the hooks near the door then made her way to the kitchen. Standing in the doorway to the kitchen, she watched him dance around. He'd blossomed in their time here.

"May I have this dance?"

Matty whirled around, "Mummy."

He ran to her, leaping into her arms. She struggled under his weight, laughing as she whirled him around, "Have you had a good day?"

"I have. Did you have a good day mummy?"

Putting him down, she kissed his head. "I did. And the best part of my day was getting home in time to take you to football practice." Matty jumped in the air. "But if you don't hurry along, we'll be late."

Matty ran from the room and she soon heard his clattering footsteps going up the stairs. She smiled at Sarah, "Anything happen today?"

The younger woman smiled, "No, he was great. I talked with one of his teachers when I picked him up she said he's been great lately."

Laura nodded, happy to hear what she had noticed herself. "You can head out once we leave. Have a long afternoon to yourself."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive. Go have a life."

"Not much of one, I have some studying I need to do."

"Well don't study too hard. It's a beautiful day outside."

A thundering on the stairs alerted them to the return of Matty, "Mummy, I need help with my socks."

Sarah moved to the doorway, "I'll go, you can change."

Laura stopped her, "Sarah, go. We're fine. I'll see you tomorrow afternoon." She walked around the woman, "Coming Matty, have a seat at the foot of the stairs."

The next few minutes were spent wrestling Matty into his socks, shin guards and shoes. They grabbed his bag and made their way out of the house. Walking hand in hand down the street Laura asked him the question she asked every day, "What was the best part of your day today?"

He swung their hands in the air, "Easy, mummy, you coming home early from work."

She laughed, easily, "I think it might be the best part of my day too."

"I also got to see the nice police man."

"What nice policeman?"

"The one from the night the bad people came to our house."

She looked down at Matty, "PC Delaney? The police officer who was in our yard?"

He shook his head, "No, mummy, the one who pulled me away from the bad people. He brought me back to you and Uncle James. I don't know his name. But he was very nice."

Laura was stunned for a moment, had stopped walking. Feeling Matty tugging on her hand, she forced a smile, "Where did you see the nice police man, Matty?"

"Across the street from our house," he dropped her hand and ran off to join his team. Laura stared after him, finding herself suddenly quite breathless.


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter 36**

Laura was distracted through most of Matty's practice. She desperately wanted to call James but didn't want Matty to overhear the conversation. They had dinner out. She'd never been more grateful that Matty wanted to talk about every detail of his practice.

As they rounded the corner to their house, Laura finally had to ask. "Matty, where did you see the nice police man?"

He pointed towards a tree across the street, "Over there. He was just standing by that tree. I waved at him and he smiled at me. Then he walked away."

"Have you seen him before?"

He shrugged, "Once or twice. I like it when I see him."

Trying to stay as calm as possible, "Why is that?"

Opening the gate, he looked back at her curiously, "Because he got me away from the bad people. He protected me."

Laura barely stopped the strangled gasp, "Do you think mummy and Uncle James didn't protect you?"

"The mean man hit you mummy. You fell down, how could you have protected me?"

She knelt in front of him, "Matty, I would have done anything to protect you."

He touched her face softly, she was surprised when she felt him wipe away a tear, "Don't be sad mummy. They were mean people. Uncle James and the nice police man saved us. It's their job."

"Do you think you might like to meet the nice police man?"

"Can I talk to him the next time I see him?"

"Mummy knows the nice police man. Perhaps, I could ask him to come see us…you."

Matty shrugged, turning toward the house, "Do you think he might like to come to my birthday party?"

She smiled to herself, marveling at the simplicity of it all through a child's mind, "I bet he would love that."

He waited for her at the door, "Then you should ask him."

Tousling his curls, she used her key to open the door, "I will."

* * *

She finally had Matty in bed and asleep. She knew his words about Robbie protecting him would echo in her mind for a long time. Her own guilt about that night had pulled at her. What if she'd just taken him to Michael's house?

Shaking her head, trying to dislodge the thought before it could take root, she picked up the phone. Dialing the number from memory, she waited for the call to connect.

"Laura, is everything OK?"

"You act as if I never call you, James."

He laughed, "You call me regularly. But generally, it's during the day or earlier in the evening. So I will repeat my question. Is everything OK?"

"We had a visitor today."

James sat up, concern filling him, "Who?"

"Robbie, I think."

"What do you mean, you think?"

"I didn't see him, Matty did. That's why I was calling to see if it was possible."

"We were both off today, so it's possible."

"Matty says it's not the first time he's seen him."

James stared at the phone, surprised, "Has he tried to talk to Matty?"

"No. He just watches them. Matty smiled at him and waved. He said Robbie smiled back then walked away."

"Are you concerned?"

She shook her head, "No, a little curious, perhaps. Why not just call me?"

"The world's great communicator?"

She sighed, a small smile crossed her face. "I guess so." She paused, silence filled the line. "I asked Matty if he wants to meet Robbie."

James sat up, almost spilling his drink. "Way to bury the lead."

Laura laughed, "I had to make sure the person was actually Robbie."

"And exactly how was I supposed to know?"

"Well if you'd said he had been working a case with you all day then I would have known it wasn't him."

He paused, debating whether he should reveal what he knew. "He's off tomorrow too."

"What are you implying?"

"I would suspect his other visits coincide with days off. Perhaps if you wanted to talk with him, you could be home at the time Matty generally comes home."

"You think he will be here again tomorrow."

James smiled, he could hear the excitement in her voice. "I'm just saying he's booked more weekdays off in the last month than I've ever known him to do before."

She shook her head, "That just means he wants to see Matty, not me."

He rolled his eyes, "Perhaps, but there is only one way to find out. Be home tomorrow and catch him at his stalking. Maybe have an actual conversation. You know one where you tell him you miss him and can't live without him. And he tells you he loves you, can't live without you and hasn't had a drink in five months."

"What?"

"Oh for goodness sake, you love him, he loves you, be a great big family…"

"The deplorable Barney reference aside, you said he hadn't had a drink in five months."

James cursed himself, knowing he'd said too much. "He hasn't, I think he's even gone to a few meetings. We've been out a few times after cases, strictly orange juice."

"I don't know what to say."

"Laura, I've tried to stay neutral here because it's what you've needed." He paused, giving her a chance to object. "Don't wait on him to call you. Walk outside tomorrow and have a conversation with him. You owe it to each other, more importantly, you owe it to Matty. He needs a father, Laura."

She swallowed, trying to push down the tears, "I know."

"You did what you thought you had to do, Laura. Robbie…he would have made a lot of mistakes, all parents do. But he would have loved Matty, and sometimes that's enough."

She nodded, wiping the hot tears from her cheeks. "Tomorrow."


	37. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37**

Laura was making a mental to do list as she walked into her office the next morning. She was trying to write it all down when the office admin knocked on her door. "Did your friend get you yesterday, Dr. Hobson?"

She looked up at the older woman, "What friend?"

Handing a stack of papers to Laura, "A man, he called about 4. I told him you were in a meeting. He said he would catch you later."

"What makes you think he was a friend?"

"He's called before."

Laura looked up from her notebook, "When?"

"Did I do something wrong?"

Laura shook her head, "No, Madeline, just curious as to when he's called before."

Madeline smiled, "Three, maybe four times over the past month."

"How do you know?" At Madeline's look, she clarified, "How do you know it was the same person? I do know more than one man."

Madeline laughed, "He has a Geordie accent. Pretty easy to tell."

Laura smiled, happy to have even more confirmation. "Thanks, Madeline. I'm going to be leaving at three today. Should the mysterious man with the Geordie accent call this afternoon, tell him I am in a meeting."

"Any reason why?"

Picking up her paperwork, Laura smiled. "Yes, a very good reason."

* * *

Laura called Sarah on her way home. She asked her to take Matty out for a treat rather than coming straight home. Once home, she freshened her hair and makeup then stationed herself where she could watch.

Ten minutes later, Robbie appeared. She watched him, analyzing him. He looked good, had lost weight. He leaned against the tree, sipping from a bottle of water, totally at ease. Taking a deep breath, she made her way to the door.

Robbie was looking down the road, he knew the direction they would come from. He didn't see or hear the door open.

"Hello, Robbie."

He turned, startled. "Laura, how did you know?"

She smiled, "It seems our son is quite a good detective too." She laughed at his quizzical look, "He saw you yesterday and a few other times. Last night he mentioned seeing the nice police man."

"I guess I need to work on my stake out skills." He paused, "I didn't mean any harm. I just wanted to see him."

She nodded, "You could have called."

"I know and I would have, I just wanted to see him, see if he was adjusting."

"He is. He hasn't had a nightmare in over a month. He's thriving at school."

"And you, Laura, how are you doing?"

She laughed, "I'm sleeping again." A comfortable silence fell between them, "Would you like to take a walk?"

He nodded, "Very much so."

They fell into an easy rhythm. Neither was in a hurry to talk. Laura was the first to break the silence, "How are you doing?"

"I'm good, patched things up with James." He laughed, "You probably already knew that."

She laughed with him, "I suspected, but didn't know. James doesn't tell me much about you. We talk about Matty and your cases and my work and our personal lives…"

"But not about me."

Shrugging she smiled up at him, "It seemed easier."

"He doesn't say anything about you either."

"Not surprising. He's good at keeping secrets, our James."

Robbie nodded, "He told me he knew about Matty for a year before he confronted you." She laughed, remembering when James said he knew about Matty. "Would you like to get a cup of coffee, maybe?"

"It's a little late for coffee. How would you feel about some ice cream?"

"Ice cream?"

She laughed, "What, I'm hungry and I'll throw in sprinkles."

"On one condition?" She raised an eyebrow, "You let me buy."

"On one condition?" He raised an eyebrow, "Come to Matty's birthday, Saturday next."

"Laura, are you sure?"

She nodded, "Yes, he wants to meet you." She raised her hand, "He wants to meet the nice police man. He doesn't know who you are or what you are to him."

He closed the distance between them, taking her hand. "I don't care, Laura. I'll be there. Whatever terms you want? Give me a chance."

"All you've ever had to do was ask, Robbie."

"Without seeming too forward, I'm not just talking about Matty."

She dropped her head, then squeezed his hand. "Let's see how ice cream goes."


	38. Chapter 38

**Chapter 38**

Robbie walked her home after their ice cream, "I meant what I said but there's something you need to know."

Stopping in front of her house, she looked up at him. "I'm listening."

He rubbed his eye, "I haven't had a drink since the night Ali died. You were right, James was right, hell even Innocent was right. My drinking was out of control." He shook his head, "It wasn't as bad as after Val but it could have gotten there. I didn't deal with my drinking then, I just got it under control. Fooled myself into thinking I could handle the odd drink here or there."

"Robbie…"

"Let me finish, Laura. I thought I had the drinking under control. But the first time something extreme happened, I panicked and ran back to the bottle."

"Why are you telling me this Robbie?"

"Because that night, that night after our almost dinner was the first night in over a year I went to sleep sober. The next day I went to a meeting."

"That's great but I don't understand."

"The thing is they don't recommend relationships in the first year."

"Oh…"

He took her hand, "Laura, I want a relationship with Matty…" She tried to pull her hand away, looking down. Tightening his grip on her hand, "And you."

She looked up, "What?"

"I want it all, Laura. You, Matty, a family. But I need to take things slowly. And I know it's not fair of me to ask."

"What are you asking, Robbie?"

"I'm asking you to wait for me."

"Wait?"

"I'm working the steps and…" He stepped away, turning from her, annoyed he was handling this so poorly.

She gently placed her hand on his shoulder, "What step?"

His shoulders sagged, grateful for her touch. "Somewhere between 8 and 9."

"Am I on the list?"

He laughed, "Several times."

"Why don't you tell me about your list over the next few months?"

He turned to her, tears brimming in his eyes. "Are you serious?"

"Yes, you can start next Saturday at Matty's birthday party."

"Can I call you in the meantime?"

She rolled her eyes, "What if I call you, you don't have the best track record with calling?"

He shook his head, "No, it's on my list."

She nodded, "OK, you'll call me."

"Mummy, why are you standing outside?"

Laura turned towards Matty, startled at his sudden appearance. "Just chatting with a friend, why don't you run inside and let Sarah know I will be in in a few minutes."

Ignoring her Matty walked down the stairs, fixated on Robbie. "You're the nice policeman who saved me from the bad people."

Robbie looked at Laura, scared to say anything. At her slight nod, he knelt in front of Matty. "Yes, I am. How are you doing?"

He shrugged, "Sometimes I have bad dreams. When I first had them, you didn't come and save me and mummy was left all alone. But now, you always come and save me. They aren't as scary now."

Robbie swallowed, trying to push away the choke of emotion threatening to overtake him. "I would never let anything happen to you or your mummy, not ever again."

"Uncle James says the same thing. Do you work with Uncle James?"

Robbie nodded, "Almost every day. He's my partner."

Matty leaned forward, "He says my mummy is a super hero."

Robbie looked up at Laura and smiled, "I think she is too."

The little boy rolled his eyes, "She's alright but she's not a super hero."

Still looking at Laura, Robbie asked, "Do you like super heroes?"

"Uh huh, I used to like Superman and I still do but my favorite is Spiderman. He's just a normal boy, like me. If I could find a radio spider…is that what it is mum?"

Laura laughed, "Radioactive."

"Yeah, a radio actor spider and get it to bite me then I could be Spiderman."

Robbie shifted to sit on the steps, "Sounds like you have a good plan. Now where does one find a "radio actor" spider?"

Matty plopped down next to Robbie on the step, "I have no idea. It's a flaw in my plan."

Robbie laughed, completely mesmerized by his son. "What's your back-up plan?"

He shrugged his little shoulders, then paused as if giving it all of the thought in the world. Finally he nodded, "I want to be a cricket player. But mum won't let me play. She will only let me play football."

Robbie looked up at Laura, "And why won't mum let you play cricket?"

"She says I am too young and I might get hurt, like I'm a baby or something."

"Or it might have something to do with you almost breaking Uncle Michael's nose the one and only time you were allowed near a cricket bat?"

Looking at Robbie he smiled, "It was an accident, honest. I didn't know he was there."

Seeing the annoyed look on Laura's face, Robbie decided to steer the conversation elsewhere, "Your mum tells me you have a birthday coming up."

He nodded, "June 9th. But my party is not until the following Saturday. Would you like to come?"

Robbie looked at Laura. She nodded, confirming the date. "June 9th is my birthday too."

"Are you having a party too?"

Robbie shook his head, "I can't remember the last time I had a party or the last time I have been to a party." He looked up at Laura, remembering exactly the last party he'd been to.

"Will you come to mine? You could have a really big slice of cake since it's your birthday too."

"Only if there is also ice cream."

Matty stood, leaning into Robbie to whisper in his ear, "There are three kinds of ice cream."

Robbie inhaled Matty's scent, forcing himself not to pull the little boy into his arms. He held out his hand, "Then you have a deal." They shook, very seriously, as if they had just brokered world peace. "Is there anything special you want for your birthday?"

Matty shrugged, "Mummy has a list. What's your name?"

"Robbie."

"Is that your real name or is it short like mine? My real name is Matthew. But I don't like being called Matthew. Mummy only calls me that when I am in trouble."

Robbie laughed, "My real name is Robert and I don't like being called Robert either. Between you and me, your mummy calls me Robert when I am in trouble."

"Robert is my middle name." Robbie looked up at Laura and she shrugged. "Do grown-ups get into trouble a lot?"

With his eyes fixed on Laura, "Only when they do something really stupid."

"That's a bad word. You'll have to put a pound in the swear jar or do a chore."

"Swear jar?"

He nodded very solemnly, "Anytime someone says a bad word, they have to put money in the swear jar or do a chore. Then when we have enough, we donate it. I think we should take the money and buy a treat but mummy says that would be rewarding the behavior."

"And who do I give this money to?"

Matty pointed toward the door, "There's a jar in the kitchen. You could come in and put it in. Or you could do a chore." He shrugged, "I don't have a job so I always have to do a chore. Sometimes Uncle James does chores to help mummy out and then he says bad words and he has to pay."

Robbie dug into his pocket pulling out a pound. He handed it to Matty, "Would you put this in the jar for me?"

"Don't you want to come in and do it yourself?"

"Not tonight. Besides, I trust you to handle such an important job."

"Matty, why don't you go on and put that away. I'll be along in a minute."

He smiled up at his mum and nodded then ran up the stairs. At the top he paused and turned back to Robbie. "It was nice to meet you, Robbie. See you next week."

Robbie watched him go, his heart pounding. He turned back to Laura, tears in his eyes. "He's brilliant. You've done a lovely job raising him."

"Thank you."

"I've missed so much."

Nodding, she sat beside him, "Yes, but there's still a lot more to come."

"Does he ever ask…who his father is?"

"More of late."

"What do you tell him?"

She let out a strangled laugh, "I haven't really. The consistent answer is his father moved away and can't quite come back yet. But one day, he will."

He leaned forward, resting his arms on his legs, "It's a sort of truth, isn't it?"

"Yes."

They sat in silence before Robbie finally said, "You always knew I would come back."

"I didn't know. I hoped."

Robbie stood, overwhelmed by the trust she had placed in him. "I should let you get inside."

She stood, concerned by his sudden mood change. "OK, sure."

Realizing his mistake, he reached for her hand, "What time should I call you?"

"When?"

"Tonight?"

She nodded, "Matty goes to bed at nine. Any time after 9:30?"

He squeezed her hand, "It's a date Dr. Hobson."


	39. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39**

The phone range at 9:30 on the dot. She let it ring twice before picking it up and pressing the button to answer, "Hello."

"Don't seem so surprised Dr. Hobson, I told you I would call."

"I'm not surprised, Robbie."

"Come on, you can admit, you're a little surprised."

She sunk into the sofa, curling her legs beneath her, "OK, maybe a little. How was your drive?"

"Uneventful. How was Matty?"

She laughed, "Excited. He finally met the nice police man. It was all he talked about all evening. I thought I would never get him to go to sleep."

"And how does his mummy feel about seeing the nice police man?"

Laura paused for a moment, considering her words. "Cautiously optimistic."

It was Robbie's turn to laugh, "That seems a fair assessment."

She listened to his laugher, realizing how much she'd missed it. It would be so easy to let this easy moment continue but she couldn't, "And I'm scared."

Robbie waited, wanted to see if she would add more. When she didn't, he dove in. "You're on my list four times."

She inhaled sharply, trying to imagine what the four items could be, "Robbie, why don't we just go with a blanket apology?"

"No, Laura, I plan on making amends for each of them. You deserve it."

She laughed, the only response she could form around the swell of emotion his words had caused. "Well I think you can mark calling me off the list."

"Not quite so fast, young lady, I think it will take many more calls before I can cross that off the list."

"Many more calls?"

He lowered his voice to an almost rumble, "Every night, that is if you're OK with that?"

She bit on her lower lip, a delighted smile lit up her face, "I'm OK with that."

* * *

Ellen watched Laura fuss around the kitchen, flitting from one thing to the next. She took a sip from her glass of water and smiled, "You're nervous."

Laura stopped in her tracks, "I am not nervous. I just want to get everything done before the guests arrive so I might be able to enjoy my son's birthday party."

"Whatever you need to tell yourself, but I know you. You've had all the details handled since mid-week." She motioned around the room, mirroring Laura's movements, "This is something else. You are nervous about the Inspector coming to this party."

"And if I am?"

Ellen shrugged, "Nothing, just be adult enough to admit it. You were nervous like this when he came to your 40th."

"That's because I was afraid he would find out about Matty."

Laughter filled the room, "It was because you wanted to drag him to your bedroom and have a repeat of what happened the night Matty was conceived."

Laura crossed the room covering Ellen's mouth with her hand, "Be quiet."

Whispering around Laura's hand, "Then admit you are nervous."

"Why are you going to get me drunk like you did that night?"

Pulling Laura's hand away, Ellen smiled gently, "No, admitting you are nervous gives you control over it." Seeing Laura relax, she continued, "You still love him, it's not the worst thing in the world. Being in love with the father of your child."

"It's too soon to think about that."

"Perhaps, but ignoring it won't make it better. Own your emotions, Laura, or you will be a nervous wreck all afternoon."

Laura huffed, "So I just say I'm nervous because the man I love and have loved for years is coming to my home to celebrate our son's birthday. And that's going to make it all better."

Ellen nodded, "How do you feel?"

"A little better."

"Good, now what can I help with?"

Laura shook her head, "Nothing, everything's done. Michael and James are setting up the last of the games on the patio."

"And where is the birthday boy?"

"In his room, faking taking a nap."

Motioning her head toward the stairs, Ellen gave Laura a soft push. "Why don't you go up and fake wake him up?" She saw Laura look toward the patio, "I'll oversee the working labor. Go on."

* * *

Laura knocked on his door. She'd heard him playing and wanted to give him a chance to get back into his bed before she entered. "Matty, time to get up."

He opened his eyes and stretched, faking a yawn. "Is it time for my party, mummy?"

She sat on the bed next to him, "Just about. We have enough time to brush your hair and make your bed. Uncle Michael, Uncle James and Aunt Ellen are already here."

"Is Robbie here?"

She smiled, "Not yet."

"Do you think he will come?"

"When I spoke to him last night he said he would be here."

Sitting up in his bed, he fixed her with an odd look. "Do you talk to him every night?"

She tried to fight a smile, remembering she had indeed talked with him every night since his visit. "Yes, I do, for a few minutes."

"Could I talk to him sometimes?"

She brushed the curls from his forehead and kissed him. "I think he would like that. We can ask him after your party."

* * *

A man Robbie didn't know answered the door when he knocked. The man looked slightly familiar and seemed to recognize Robbie. As he walked through the door, the man lightly touched his arm. "Perhaps we could have a conversation before you go outside."

Robbie turned to him and the familiar feeling settled. This was Laura's brother. He nodded then followed as the man led the way. Michael led him into a side room then closed the door behind him. Turning to Robbie, he offered his hand. "Michael Hobson."

Robbie set the two presents he was holding on the desk then took the offered hand, "Robbie Lewis."

"I don't want to make this too awkward. But I wanted you to know… Look, I love my sister but I never agreed with her not telling you."

Robbie smiled, somewhat surprised with the way this conversation was going. "She was right. I was a mess. Telling me would have sent me into more of a tailspin. Hell, when she told me it did and I wasn't nearly as bad off as I was when I left."

"I love Matty, like he was my own. If you are in his life, you are in his life. Don't go in there unless you plan to stay, forever."

"Duly noted, and for the record, I'm not going anywhere. I plan on being here for the lad and for Laura."

Michael shrugged, "Laura can more than take care of herself. If you hurt her, you have her to answer to. Hurt Matty and you'll have me to answer to."

* * *

The party had gone perfectly. Matty had played with his friends, opened presents and everyone had cake and ice cream. As the party guests started to depart, Laura pulled Robbie to the side. "Will you stay? After everyone has left?"

He smiled down at her, "Of course, I'm a dab hand at clean up."

"It's not for clean-up. There's something else."

"Is everything OK?"

Laura laughed, touching his arm lightly, "You'll just have to stay to find out."

* * *

The last of the guests were gone. Robbie was helping Matty carry his presents upstairs. "Robbie, did you have fun at my birthday party?"

"I did. Did you have a good time?"

Putting the boxes down in the corner of his room, he turned to Robbie. "I did. Did you like the ice cream?"

"Very much, it makes the cake better."

Matty rolled his eyes, "I tell mummy that all the time. She doesn't let me have cake or ice cream much."

Robbie smiled, "Mummy's are like that."

"Uncle Michael and Uncle James let me have sweets when I am with them."

"Well that's because they are uncles, uncles do a lot of things parents won't do."

"Do you think my dad would let me?"

Robbie leaned against the door, his heart pounding in his chest. "In my experience, dads tend to follow mummy's rules."

"So it wouldn't matter if my dad were around?"

Robbie walked to Matty then knelt before him. "Was there anything you didn't get for your birthday you really wanted?"

Matty looked over his shoulder, peeking to see if his mother was near the door. "I really wanted a puppy but mummy says no, not until I am older."

"A puppy, what kind of puppy?"

"A Labrador, a yellow one."

"That's a big dog for a little boy."

"I'm only little for now, I'm gonna get bigger."

Unable to resist, he pulled the boy to him, hugging him tightly. He laughed lightly in his ear, "Of course you are." Robbie was stunned when he felt Matty's little arms wrapped around him. "Maybe when you are a wee bit bigger, we can talk to your mother together."

"Are you staying for dinner?"

Lifting Matty, he shifted so they were sitting on his bed. Matty settled in his lap laying his head on Robbie's shoulder. "I believe I have been invited."

The little boy shifted his head, rubbing his eyes against Robbie's shirt. "That's good, we have a sur…"

Robbie looked down and smiled. Matty had fallen asleep mid-sentence. For a moment, he thought of lifting his son and putting him into his bed. Inhaling his scent, he changed his mind. As gently as possible, he shifted into a reclining position on the bed. He kissed the top of Matty's head, enjoying the soft warmness of the little boy. Closing his eyes, desperate to cement this moment in his mind. Tightening his arms around his son, he fell asleep.


	40. Chapter 40

**Chapter 40**

"Matty, Robbie, it's time for dinner." Laura looked up the stairs, expecting to hear their voices. "Matty, Robbie." When there was still no answer she climbed the stairs. She pushed open Matty's door and time stood still. Matty and Robbie were sound asleep.

She crept into the room, sitting lightly on the edge. Reaching over, she brushed the curls from Matty's face. Her hand lingered on his cheek. Without thinking, she reached over and stroked Robbie's cheek. Gasping slightly, she pulled her hand away. His hand caught hers before she could pull away.

She looked down into his blue eyes, the same one's she looked into everyday with Matty. He pulled her hand back to his cheek, cupping it to him. His eyes slid closed. He held Laura's hand to his face while gently kissing Matty's head. This is how life should have been, how it could be. He said a silent prayer that he wouldn't mess this chance up.

She watched him, wondered what thoughts were cycling through his mind. It was the first time she'd ever seen him completely at peace. This was what she wanted, had always wanted. She smiled down at him as he opened his eyes. "Sorry to disturb your nap."

"This probably isn't why you wanted me to stay."

She laughed lightly, "Not specifically, but he needed a nap and he wouldn't have taken one for me. So you proved quite useful."

"Why did you want me to stay?"

"Why don't we wake him and have some dinner? Then you can find out." Leaning over she kissed Matty gently on the cheek. Robbie resisted the urge to wrap his arm around her waist, pull her into the small bed with them. "Matty, time to wake up, dinner is ready." The little boy snuggled deeper into Robbie's arms, rubbing his head into his chest. "If you don't get up, we can't do the other thing?"

Matty turned his head toward his mother, opening one eye. "You didn't tell him, did you?"

She shook her head, "I didn't, did you?"

He paused for a moment, remembering their earlier conversation. Finally, he shook his head, "I didn't tell him about the surprise."

Laura and Robbie both laughed. Matty sat up, "No fair, why are you laughing? Are you laughing at me?"

Robbie, who was still prone on the bed, looked up at mother and son, mirror images of one another and was happier than he'd been in longer than he could remember. "Is the surprise for me?"

"Mummy, you said you didn't tell him."

Laura laughed, "I didn't tell him."

Robbie ruffled his son's blonde curls, "No one told, I am a detective. I figured it out all on my own."

Matty looked down at him, not quite sure he believed. "What's the surprise then?"

"It's something for me. But I can only get it once everyone was gone."

The little boy's eyes widened, "You're right. And mummy said I have to eat all of my dinner or I don't get to have any."

Laura leaned over, kissing Matty on the cheek, "That's right. Now go wash up because dinner is ready."

Matty launched himself off the bed and out of the room. "Whose idea was it to get me a cake?"

She smiled down at Robbie, "His. He suggested it earlier in the week. I think he was a little sad that you haven't had a party in a long time."

"He's very kind, like his mother."

She looked down at him, suddenly very aware they were sitting close together on an awfully small bed. Thoughts of her much larger bed filled her mind, then she remembered their promise to take things slowly. She stood, putting some distance between them, "I'm going to go down and get the plates ready. Come on down when you are ready."

He watched her rush out of the room, her cheeks flushed. He closed his eyes trying to push away the thoughts he'd had of pulling her to him just now. "Robbie, I'm all washed up, let's go eat."

Pushing up from the bed, he smiled at Matty. "Did you wash both sides?"

The little boy's eyes widened, "How did you know?"

"I'm a really good detective. Come on I need to wash my hands too. We can inspect each other."

* * *

The remnants of a small cake was sitting on the table. Matty was polishing off his second piece and his face was covered in chocolate. Robbie smiled at him, "I think you might have missed one present earlier."

Taking a sip of his milk, he shook his head. "No way, there were no more presents on the table. I checked."

"This one I might have left in your mum's office. Why don't you wash your face and hands then go look for it."

He tore down the hall to the downstairs bathroom. Laura called after him, "Let me see before you go into my office." She looked questioningly at Robbie, "What have you done?"

Before he could answer, Matty was back. He held up his hands for inspection. Laura took a napkin and wiped a missed spot from his face, then turned him and patted him on his bottom, "Off you go."

He tore through the house. She heard her office door open, then a gleeful shout then the clattering of little feet as he ran back to the kitchen carrying a large box. He plopped down on the floor and started tearing at the paper.

Robbie watched him, hoping Laura wouldn't be too mad. Matty pulled the lid off the large box and pulled a red bag from the box. He looked at Robbie inquisitively, "Open the bag."

Matty unzipped the bag and his eyes opened wide. Reaching in, he pulled out a brand new Kookaburra cricket bat. "Mummy…"

"Robbie?"

Robbie looked at Laura, "I promise to teach him how to use it and use it responsibly. But you can't hold one accident against the lad."

"Mummy, can I please keep it, it even has my name on it?"

Knowing she'd lost the battle, she nodded. "I guess, since it has your name on it."

Matty hugged her quickly then jumped into Robbie's arms. "It's my most favorite gift ever."

Robbie hugged his son fighting tears as the little arms squeezed him. "You are very welcome." Kneeling in front him, "And remember, no playing with it in the house. Perhaps next weekend, the three of us could go to the park and I can teach you a little bit." He looked up at Laura, "If mummy doesn't mind, that is?"

She shook her head, "That sounds wonderful. But for now, it's time for a little boy to take a bath. Why don't you leave the bat here until after you are in your pajamas?"

She plucked the bat from his hands before he could object. Knowing better than to complain, he nodded. "Yes, mummy. But can I have it back after my bath."

She nodded and he ran off. Once she heard him on the stairs, she turned to Robbie. He held up his hands, "I know I should have asked and I well overstepped my bounds…"

"I've half a mind to hit you with this bat myself."

He knew her angry voice and this wasn't it, "You're not really mad."

Her eyes flashed, "I…How…"

"You're just a tiny bit pleased I did it." She started to object, "Michael and James probably follow whatever you say regarding Matty. But I won't. If I am in his life, I am in his life and sometimes we are going to disagree. Sometimes you are going to win and sometimes I am going to win. It's what makes a good partnership."

She opened her mouth to argue with him and found she didn't want to. A brilliant smile broke out on her face as she suddenly accepted she had a partner in raising Matty. "I wasn't going to argue with you." Robbie gave her a knowing looking but let her have her delusion. "I was just going to say, I have a gift for you."

"A gift, for me? The cake was enough, inviting me here was enough."

She turned from him, opening a drawer and removing an envelope. Turning back to him, she handed it to him. "It's not much."

He opened the envelope and removed the card. Inside was the scrawled signature of Matty along with Laura's much neater writing. Additionally, there was a folded piece of paper. He unfolded it then looked at Laura, confused.

"It's Matty's football schedule. I thought you might like to join us for a few games. We usually go out for pizza afterwards. It's not much…"

"It's everything. I would love to."

"I know you won't be able to make them all…"

"I'll make as many as I can."

She smiled, "He would also like it if you occasionally called a little earlier. He would like to talk to you."

"Is that alright with you?" She battled with herself knowing she would miss their late night chats. "It doesn't mean we can't still talk later."

She looked up at him, "How…"

He took a step toward her, "I like when yours is the last voice I hear before I go to sleep."

Laura took a step toward him, leaning into him. His head lowered, they moved closer. "Mummy can I have my cricket bat back?"


	41. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41**

Four months later, Robbie and Laura still talked each night, sometimes for a long time and sometimes for just a couple of minutes. But every night at 9:30 he called her.

One thing they had both been careful of was being alone together. The night in her kitchen had both excited and scared each of them. Without speaking of it, they knew how easy it would be to fall into bed, to fall into a relationship before they were truly ready.

It wasn't to say they didn't do things together, just always accompanied by a little boy. Today was one of those days. They sat a respectable distance apart from one another watching Matty play with friends at the park. Robbie turned slightly toward her while keeping an eye on Matty, "I have something to tell you."

She smiled, briefly glancing at him. The seriousness of his look made her anxious. "Is everything alright?"

"I think it is but I'm not sure how you are going to take it."

Her heart suddenly racing, she swallowed, "Go on."

"It's about Our Lyn. She's pregnant."

She reached for him, wrapping her arms around his neck, "That's fantastic, Robbie." Pulling back slightly, she met his eyes, "Why do you think I wouldn't be happy for you?"

His hands finally came to rest at her waist, he was fighting the urge to pull her back to him, bury his head in her neck. "It wasn't so much her being pregnant I was worried about. It's the next part." He paused, looking briefly back to Matty, smiling to see him laughing with his friends. "I want to tell her and Patrick about Matty."

Laura stroked his cheek, suddenly overwhelmed by her feelings for him. "You don't have to. I know how hard it will be for you."

"No, Laura, I want everyone to know."

"When?"

"Early next month, I'm planning to take a few weeks off. I'll go to see her first. She will be the most accepting. She already thinks there is something going on between us. Then I'll go to Australia. I have amends I need to make with Patrick."

"Do you really think that's the right time to tell him?"

"It's all or nothing Laura. It's not like I have a relationship with him, not really. He'll either forgive me and accept it or he won't. But I have to try and I won't keep any secrets in the process."

"Do you want me to go with you to see Lyn?"

He shook his head, "Not this time. I have to do this alone."

She smiled, understanding, "Out of curiosity, what have you told her is going on between us?"

He leaned in and just before he pressed his lips to hers, he whispered, "That we are taking things very slowly."

She pushed into him, deepening the kiss in an instant. Moaning into his mouth when she felt his hands tighten around her waist. The only thought in her head was how tired she was of moving slowly. She was pulling herself closer to him when the shrill sound of a child crying broke through. It wasn't Matty but it was enough to make her aware of their surroundings.

They pulled away at the same instant, both breathing hard. He rested his head against her forehead, "I'm sorry."

She shook her head, "No need. That was probably inevitable."

He chuckled, "Even though we've gone out of our way not to let it happen."

She laughed, sitting up, pulling out of his grasp. "At least we know, there's still an attraction."

Looking toward the playground, he saw Matty running to them. He took her hand, instantly linking their fingers. Before Matty was in earshot he leaned over, "Attraction doesn't even begin to cover it, Dr. Hobson."

* * *

Robbie stood outside his daughter's house. He'd called her, she was expecting him yet he was extremely nervous. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath and was just about to take the last few steps when the door opened.

"Dad, are you going to stand out here all afternoon?"

He laughed at her easy teasing, hoped it wouldn't disappear once he revealed his secret. "No, pet. I was just about to knock."

She tilted her head, taking in his appearance. On one hand, he looked healthier than she had seen in years. On the other, he appeared more stressed. "Where's your bag? You are staying?"

He pointed back toward his car, "It's in the car; I'll get it in a bit."

Stepping back, she motioned for him to come inside, "I put the kettle on when I heard you pull up. Should almost be ready."

They made their way to the kitchen, working together to make tea. Knowing her dad's sweet tooth she'd purchased a few sweets for them to share. As they settled at her kitchen table, each with a fresh cup and an uneaten piece of cake in from of them, she started the conversation.

"Why are you really here, dad?"

"I wanted to see you, see how you are getting on."

She pressed her lips together, wondering why he tried so hard to protect her. "Dad, I know something's wrong. Out with it."

He met her eyes, somewhat surprised to see a grown woman staring back at him. "When did you grow up?"

"While you weren't looking."

Tears filled his eyes, "I'm so sorry Lyn."

"Don't be, I didn't mean it as a condemnation of you as a parent. I suspect most parents ask themselves that same question. It all goes by in the blink of an eye, or so I'm told." Her hand came to rest on her stomach.

He nodded, "It does. Your kids are born, then they are walking and running and going away. Don't miss a moment of it."

"Has something happened, are you ill?"

"Yes and no."

Reaching across the table, she covered his hand with hers, "What is it, dad?"

With a deep breath, he told her his story. He didn't leave out any of the details, including the ones which painted him not in the best light. At the end, he sighed, "I will understand if you hate me and want me to leave."

Lyn took a deep breath, trying to process all her father had told her. "He's six?"

Robbie nodded, "If you asked him, he would tell you six and a half."

"And you have a relationship with him?"

He shrugged, "Of a sort, I'm in his life but he doesn't know I'm his father."

"Dr. Hobson, Laura, are you in a relationship with her?"

Again he shrugged, "Of a sort."

"Are you going to marry her?"

Robbie laughed, inappropriately and too loudly. At Lyn's surprise he pointed at her stomach, "Are you going to marry Tim?"

Lyn froze for a moment then joined her father's laughter, "It really was a wrong question, wasn't it?" She paused for a moment, "But I know you, dad. You're not a halfway sort of man. You live in Oxford, she lives in London. After you tell him, what happens then?"

Robbie looked away. He'd known Lyn would accept Matty but his next part he wasn't as sure she would accept. "If Laura will have me, I'd like to retire be a full-time dad. Take care of her and of Matty."

Lyn stared at him. She didn't want to feel jealous but somehow she did. It wasn't as if her dad had been a bad father. He hadn't been around a lot but when he was, he was a good dad. She'd long forgiven him for his behavior after the death of her mother.

His grief had been palpable, a living, breathing thing. Children expected to bury their parents, at some point planned for it. But to suddenly lose your partner and know the remainder of your life would never be the same was a different type of grief. One for which you could never really prepare.

"I don't understand what you want, dad."

"I'm not sure I want anything really. I wanted you to know. I hope you can understand and one day accept, him, me, Laura and me."

"Dad, it's all a shock. I knew you were getting closer to Dr. Hobson but I didn't know…"

Robbie shook his head, "I know. It certainly wasn't what I was expecting either."

"I would ask if you love her but you wouldn't make these type of plans if you didn't."

He dropped his head, "It doesn't mean I love your mother less."

Reaching across the table, she took his hand, "Dad, I never thought that for a moment." She squeezed his hand, smiling kindly when he finally met her eyes, "Mum would never have wanted you to be alone. She would have wanted you to find someone to love."

"Would she have wanted me to have another family?"

Lyn shrugged, "How is it any different than if you'd fallen in love with someone who had children? Are you happy, dad?"

He nodded, "For the first time in a long time, I am."

"That's all that matters. The rest will work itself out."

"When did you get so smart?"

"Good genes." At his proud smile she had to tease, "Mum was brilliant. You brought the average down a bit. Probably where Patrick gets it from."

A troubled frown crossed his face, "I'm going there next." At her look, he continued, "To see Patrick. To tell him, in person."

"Well that should be interesting."

"It's not the only reason I'm going. You forgave me all of my foibles. Your brother never did. I don't know that I've talked to him in two years."

"He's angry dad, still. I don't know what happened before he left. But he might not ever forgive you." She paused, not wanting to pour salt, "And he's going to see this as you trying to replace him. Right the wrongs you committed all those years ago."

He nodded, acknowledging the truth of her statement, "I know and I'm ready."

She smiled, seeing a clarity in him she hadn't seen since before her mother's death. Her brother might not be ready to forgive but it would be his loss. Pouring a bit more tea for each of them she smiled, "When do I get to meet my little brother?"


	42. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42**

The taxi dropped him in front of the small house. Robbie had briefly considered renting a car then decided this might be better. He wouldn't be able to run this way. He would be forced to stay and work through the hard feelings. Hopefully, Patrick would see it the same way.

Walking up the short path, he knocked on the door. A small woman answered the door. She had dark hair, almost black, and shocking green eyes. She smiled up at him, "You must be Robbie." He nodded, somewhat confused. She offered her hand, "I'm Kate."

Shaking her hand, he smiled, trying to cover his discomfort. "Yes, is Patrick here?"

She reach across him, taking his bag, "Come on in. I'll get you settled."

"Who are you?"

Giving Robbie a gentle smile, she turned at walked deeper into the house. "I'm Patrick's wife." Robbie stopped walking staring at the departing frame of the young woman. She turned back to him, "Let's get you settled then I will tell you everything."

* * *

They sat awkwardly on the back patio. Robbie was at a loss for words. Patrick had been married for two years and had never bothered to tell him. He'd only told his sister recently but had sworn her to secrecy.

"I know this must be quite the shock for you. I've pushed Patrick to tell you." She shrugged, seeming to apologize for her lack of success.

Robbie shook his head, "It's not your fault. Patrick and I have a difficult relationship. If his sister couldn't talk him into something…"

"He's never told me what happened. Would you care to share the story?"

Robbie shrugged, "Not much to share. My wife died, I lost myself, the kids were the victim. Lyn was able to forgive me. Patrick never has."

"Are you dying?"

"What?"

"It's what Patrick thinks. He thinks you've come here to say goodbye."

Robbie shook his head, "No, I'm not dying, at least not anytime soon."

"Then why are you here?"

"To make amends. I made a lot of mistakes after Val died. Over the years, I probably made them worse by not confronting the problem."

"He may not forgive you."

Robbie nodded, "I know, but I have to try. Do you know when he will be back?"

She stood, "In a couple of hours. He had an emergency at the marina. I'm going to start dinner. If you want you can rest a bit. When he gets back we can all have dinner together."

"I could help you, if you want."

"That's sweet but I can handle it. Get some rest, I suspect you are going to need it."

"I'm in for a battle, aren't I?"

Touching him lightly on the shoulder, she smiled, "Yes."

* * *

Robbie woke to the alarm on his phone. He'd set it on the off chance he actually fell asleep. Rolling over in the bed, he silenced the device. He listened, could hear two voices engaged in what sounded like a heated conversation. Not wanting to eavesdrop, knowing the conversation was likely about him, he dragged himself from bed and made his way to the bathroom.

The voices stopped as they heard him moving about. He closed the bathroom door and instantly started the water, giving them privacy to continue their conversation. The hot water sluiced across his body. He leaned his head into the wall trying to steel himself for the battle to come.

He'd told Laura and Lyn that he didn't need Patrick's forgiveness but he desperately wanted it. Wanted to put the past behind them and forge a relationship. Lyn's warning, as well as Kate's lingered in his mind. Pushing it all away, he finished his shower, dressed and made his way downstairs.

Kate was in the kitchen, stirring something on the stove. "Can I help in anyway?"

She turned to him, smiling, "No, it'll all be ready in ten minutes." Pointing toward the patio doors, "Patrick's outside, if you want to go out."

Robbie nodded, "Thanks." He walked to the doors and set eyes on his son for the first time in almost ten years.

Patrick was taller, broader than the day he'd walked out of his childhood home. He'd been on the cusp of manhood then, an adult in age but not quite physically. All of the boyishness Robbie remembered was gone, replaced with a grown man.

Stepping across the threshold, onto the patio, he braced himself. "Hello, son."

 **Author's note: If you are not reading "The Other Place" you need to be. It is heart breakingly beautiful. Also it will give you someone else to hate besides me.**


	43. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43**

Patrick took a deep breath before turning to face his father. "Hello."

Robbie stood awkwardly, unsure how to proceed. He wanted to close the gap between them and pull his son into his arms. But he knew it would be unwelcome. "It's good to see you."

Patrick stared at his father, wondering at how much he'd aged in the past ten years. He wondered if it was natural or due to the drinking. "Did you have a good flight?"

"Uneventful, I didn't sleep much on the flight. I'll probably make it an early night."

"Kate got you settled?"

Robbie nodded, "Yes, she's lovely." He took a few steps toward his son, "It's a lovely place you have here, a real home."

Patrick nodded, "It's all down to Kate. Left to me I'd still be in a one room flat."

Thinking of his own sad flat versus Laura's warm, inviting home, he had to laugh. "I'm much the same. It's a place to sleep, watch some telly…"

"Drink yourself into a stupor? Would you like a drink, dad? I made sure to stock the bar."

"Some orange juice if you have it. If not, some water is fine."

Patrick stared at him for a moment, "I'm not sure what to mix with the orange juice, vodka was never your drink, dad. I could splash some whisky over that water though."

Robbie sighed, wished Patrick's use of the word dad didn't sound so much like a curse. "Just the juice or just the water."

"Waiting for the sun to go down, dad?"

He shook his head, "No, I don't drink anymore. Haven't had one in almost eleven months."

"Liver finally give out?"

Robbie had to laugh, "No, I'm perfectly healthy."

Patrick paused, unsure how to continue. He'd expected the blustering version of his father he'd encountered the last time he'd seen him. This calm, smiling version wasn't what he was prepared for. "You won't mind if I have a drink, will you?"

"Not at all."

Patrick stalked past him, mind whirling as he tried to reconcile the man standing on his patio with the man he'd run away from all of those years ago.

* * *

Dinner was a two-sided affair. Robbie and Kate talked, awkwardly at first, then more easily. Any attempts to drag Patrick into the conversation ended in a monosyllabic answer which brought the conversation to a halt.

As the meal came to an end, Robbie offered to help Kate clear the table. She politely declined, then motioned her head toward Patrick. Robbie smiled at her, understanding her point.

After she left, the two men sat in silence at the table. Robbie knew not to push, he was happy to sit and let his son come to him. He sipped on his water and waited.

Patrick sat there, fuming at his wife for leaving him alone with his father and at his father simply for being there. When Robbie had called to ask about visiting, he'd called his sister. He needed to know why the sudden, urgent need for a visit. In the ten years he'd lived in Australia, his father had never expressed a desire to visit.

Now suddenly, here he was sitting on his patio, calmly sipping from a glass of water as if it was the most normal thing in the world. Patrick could feel his anger building. Finally, unable to take it anymore, he turned to his father. "Why are you here?"

Robbie smiled, "For exactly the reason I told you. I want us to have a relationship. It's my fault we don't have one and I want to make it up to you."

"And you just expect me to forgive you? Act like nothing happened."

"I do hope you will forgive me but I can't ask you to forget what happened." Patrick froze, unsure of how to continue. "Patrick, I made a lot of mistakes. The least of which was falling into a bottle after your mum died. I can't change any of it. If I could go back and do it all over, I would."

"What would you have done, dad?"

Robbie shook his head, "I don't know. But not opening that bottle would be chief among the things I wouldn't do. I lost myself in my own grief and I never saw yours or your sister's."

"You left us, it was like losing two parents. You might as well have been in that car with mum."

"There was a time I wished I had been. It would have been easier. Then, after you left, I wished it had been me instead of your mum. She would have handled it better. Known what to do for you and Lyn."

Patrick stared at his father, surprised by the admission. "You really think we would have been better off without you?"

Robbie motioned around, "Look what you've built for yourself. You did all of this without me, probably in spite of me. At least if your mother had been alive, you would have felt like someone else was in your corner."

Patrick stood, bumping the table, scraping it across the tile of the patio. "I needed you in my corner, dad. But the only way I would have gotten that is if the corner was a corner bar."

Kate having heard the noise, appeared at the door. Robbie saw her, held up his hand, stopping her from intervening. She looked at him, unsure and he simply nodded. She turned and walked back inside.

"I am in your corner, Patrick. I can't change what I did, it will always be the thing I am most ashamed of. But I can say I am sorry. I can promise it will never happen again and I can beg for your forgiveness." Robbie paused, the emotion of the moment, overwhelming him, "I want to be a part of your life and to have you as a part of mine. But I won't push. I came to say my piece and hope we can find some way to put the past behind us and start anew."

"You've said your piece. You can leave now."

"No, he can't." Both men turned to the voice from the door. "He's a guest in our home, Patrick. And whether you want to admit it or not, your lack of relationship with him colors everything else you do."

Robbie stood, "Kate, it's fine. I can leave tonight. I'll find a hotel."

She rolled her eyes, not certain which of the Lewis men was more stubborn. "No, you will not be leaving. I don't care what Patrick does but I would like to get to know my father-in-law. I want a relationship with you. I want our children to have a relationship with you."

"Kate, you promised."

She shook her head, "No, I didn't. You told me not to say anything but I never agreed."

Robbie smiled, "Are you?"

She nodded, "Yes, middle of June."

Robbie closed the distance between them, pulling Kate into his arms, "Congratulations. How are you feeling?"

She smiled at his enthusiasm, "Other than a little morning sickness and fatigue, I'm doing well."

Robbie turned to Patrick, "I'm so happy for you."

Patrick stared at the two of them, anger bubbling up inside him. "I can't do this. I'm going for a run." He walked around Robbie, kissed Kate on the cheek, "I'll be back later."

She watched him go, ashamed of his behavior. When she heard the door close, she smiled back at Robbie. "I'm sorry. He'll come around."

Robbie shook his head, "He might not. There's a lot of water under that bridge." He looked down at her, "Were you serious about what you said? About having a relationship with me?"

She nodded, smiling shyly. Her hand went unconsciously to her stomach, "You are this one's last grandparent. My parents are both gone."

"I'm sorry."

She smiled, "Thank you. But now you understand why I am so determined."

He laughed as he looked down at her. There was something about her which reminded him of both Val and Laura. Suddenly, he missed her very much. "If you don't mind, I think I will go to bed."

"I don't mind." He walked past her and she touched his arm, "Don't worry, Robbie. He will come around."

* * *

In his room, he found his phone. Blindly, fighting tears, he pressed the button to connect him to Laura. He gripped the phone tightly as he listened to the rings.

"What time is it there?"

Relief flooded through him at the sound of her voice, "Eight."

"You must be exhausted."

"I napped a bit earlier but I am still pretty tired."

She could hear the tension in his voice, "Are you OK?"

"I just needed to hear a friendly voice. I needed to hear your voice."

Laura smiled, "I'm always here, night or day."

He exhaled, taking comfort in those simple words. "You don't know how much that means to me." He paused, listened to the static on the call. He could hear her breathing and was comforted, "Tell me something good."

"Matty lost a tooth this morning."

"Did it hurt, is he OK?"

"I'd say it didn't hurt much as he didn't even notice it. And he swallowed the tooth. Now he's worried the tooth fairy won't visit."

Robbie laughed, "How did you handle it?"

"I assured him the tooth fairy would, in fact, visit. But only if he finished his breakfast."

"And how did he take the news?"

"He finished his breakfast and we made it to school on time."

"I love you, Laura." He heard her gasp, "I know I should have waited until I was there and taken you somewhere nice for dinner and…"

"I love you too, Robbie. And I don't need a nice dinner or any of that. I need you, Matty needs you. Come home."

He inhaled deeply, "Home, which home is that?"

"Here, with us, if you'll have us."

He sat up in the bed, "Are you serious?"

"Don't tell me you haven't thought about it."

"Of course I've thought about it but I didn't want to rush you."

She sighed, "I don't think we've rushed anything Robbie. And, quite frankly, I'm tired of waiting for our life to start. But if you need more…"

He yelled into the phone, "No! I mean yes."

"Which is it Robbie?"

"No, I don't need more time and yes I am tired of waiting."

"So have we made a decision?"

He sighed, relieved at the simplicity of it all. "I guess we have." Silence filled the line, "Is it really this easy?"

She laughed, "Probably not. But at least we know we are on the same page."

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"Answering the phone."

She smiled, "Do you want to tell me about it?"

"Tonight."

"Tonight?"

"You didn't think I was going to miss our nightly date did you?"


	44. Chapter 44

**Chapter 44**

The next few days passed in icy silence. Robbie and Kate got to know one another better. Patrick joined them for meals, eating in silence. Katie played tour guide for Robbie, showing him all of her and Patrick's favorite places.

On the morning of his last full day he was sitting on the patio talking with Laura. It was early but the sound of her voice had served to cheer him up. He was telling her about the sunrise just beginning to creep over the horizon. She was telling him about Matty's growing Christmas list.

He laughed, "I bet I know something that isn't on that list."

"What's that?"

"A puppy."

"When did you have this conversation with him?"

Robbie laughed, "On his birthday, he told me you think he is too young."

"He is too young, or I'm too old. I haven't really decided."

"I told him when he got older we would talk to you together."

She huffed, "Plotting against me are you?"

Robbie laughed, knowing she wasn't angry at all, "Of course, someone has to. We can't let you have all of the control."

"Something tells me I have no control at all."

"Us boys have to stick together."

"It's a good thing I love you both so much."

"That feeling is completely mutual." He paused, "I miss you."

"Same here. What time do you get back tomorrow?"

"Late afternoon, I'll call you after I clear customs."

"Will you come over? Perhaps stay the night?"

"Dr. Hobson, are you trying to seduce me?"

She laughed, "I have a spare room. I have two spare rooms to be precise."

Smiling at her response, "Well with an offer like that how can I possibly refuse?"

"I know you'll be tired, you don't have to…"

"Laura, I'll call you when I'm on my way. Now you need to get to bed. I love you."

"I love you, Robbie. Travel safely, see you tomorrow."

He ended the call, staring across the yard as the sun finally slipped over the horizon. "You sound happy."

He turned, shocked to find his son standing in the doorway. Rather than try to deny it, he shrugged, "I am happy."

"Who is she?"

"Someone I used to work with, you might remember her, Laura Hobson."

Patrick shrugged, noncommittally, "Maybe, I'm not sure. Is she why you've had this change?"

Robbie nodded, "Some of it, yes."

"She has a kid."

"A son, he's six."

Leaning into the door, "It sounds like he's getting a puppy for Christmas."

Robbie laughed, "Well that's still up for debate."

Patrick shook his head, "No, I heard your voice." He smiled, "I remember the Christmas we got a puppy. You sounded the same. Mum was furious."

Nodding, Robbie smiled at the memory and then more broadly when he realized Patrick was smiling too. "She was but she ended up loving that dog more than the rest of us combined."

"Yeah, she did." Patrick met his dad's eyes for the first time since he'd arrived. "I thought maybe you'd like to go in with me today. See what I do."

Robbie nodded, almost afraid to speak. He stood and walked to his son. Carefully he reached out and put his hand on his shoulder, "I'd love to."

* * *

They spent the day together. It was easy, yet cautious. Time spent getting to know each other. Neither pushed for more just let nature takes its course.

As they sat at lunch Patrick asked, "Would you like to go out on one of the boats?"

"You're not planning on pushing me into the ocean are you?"

Patrick laughed, the first real laugh Robbie had heard from him in too long. "Not a chance. Kate would kill me. She really likes you."

"I really like her. You're a lucky man."

"Luckier than I probably deserve."

Robbie leaned forward, meeting his son's eyes, "I always felt the same about your mother. About Laura too."

Patrick nodded, unsure of what to say. Finally he bobbed his head toward the marina, "Let's go."

* * *

They spent the afternoon sailing. Patrick was patient and showed Robbie what to do. As they were headed back to the marina he'd declared Robbie a passable sailor.

As they were working together to tie off the boat, Robbie broached the last secret. "Patrick, there's one last thing I have to tell you."

Patrick looked up at his father and smiled, "The boy is yours."

Robbie blinked, "Lyn told you?"

Patrick shook his head, "No, being raised by a detective father gave me a few skills." Robbie shook his head, trying to figure out when he'd given it away. "You left your phone on the table at lunch. There's a picture of him as your wallpaper. I recognized the eyes."

"I didn't want you to find out that way."

"It's OK, actually. It gave me time to digest it."

"Why didn't you ask when you saw it?"

Patrick nodded, smiling at his father, "Because I knew you would tell me. And I was OK waiting." At the tender look on his father's face, he walked to him. Holding out his hand, "I'm really glad you came, dad."

Robbie took his son's hand and pulled him to him, "I am too, son. I am too."

* * *

There was no taxi ride to the airport. Patrick and Kate insisted on taking him. They parked and walked him in, waiting as he collected his boarding pass. They walked with him as far as they could go.

He pulled Kate to him, wrapping his arms around her. "Thanks for putting up with me."

"It was nothing. You are welcome anytime."

He smiled down at her, "I'll be back. You take care of him and that little one."

Nodding, she wiped tears from her cheeks, "I will."

He turned to his son, "Every Monday 7 AM?" Patrick nodded, reaching for his father. As they hugged, Robbie whispered in his ear, "I love you, son. Don't ever forget that."

Patrick nodded against his father, "I love you too, dad."

As they pulled apart, each wiped away tears. Kate moved to wrap her arm around Patrick's waist. They waved as Robbie picked up his bag and headed for the security line and home.


	45. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45**

Laura had promised Matty dinner out. She'd hoped Robbie would be there in time as a surprise for Matty. Cursing herself for not getting his flight number so she could monitor his flight, she hustled Matty to get ready.

She opened the front door, pushing Matty along. Matty saw Robbie standing at the gate and almost screamed. Robbie held up his hand telling his son to be quiet. Laura was fumbling to lock the door when her mobile rang.

She dug into her pocket cursing quietly as she dropped her keys, "Hello."

"That's a pound for the swear jar, Laura."

"How did you know?"

"Turn around, Laura."

She turned on the step, frowning when she saw him. "You were supposed to call when you cleared customs."

He smiled, "I am calling. And I said after customs." Lifting his bag, "Do you, by chance, have a place I could store this? Then I could take you and the lad to dinner."

Matty had been carefully watching their interchange raced down the stairs, "Are you staying the night Robbie?"

Looking up at Laura, he raised an eyebrow, "I think that's up to your mother."

"Mummy, mummy, can he please stay? He can sleep in my bed."

A small smile played across her face, "I suppose for one night. To spare you having to drive back to Oxford as tired as you undoubtedly are."

Matty picked up Laura's dropped keys, "Here you go Mummy."

Laura took the keys, then realized she still held her mobile to her cheek. She ended the call putting it into her pocket. "Come on let's get you settled."

Robbie climbed the stairs, standing right behind her. She could feel the heat from his skin, "Let's just get this inside. I can get settled later."

She breathed in, holding the breath, trying to steady herself. Inserting the key in the lock, she opened the door. "Set it inside the door."

He placed his hand on her waist, leaning around her to push his bag in the door. "Let's take our lad to dinner, Laura."

She nodded, releasing the breath she'd been holding. Pulling the door closed and locking it, she turned in his arms. He was so close, smiling down at her. "I am very hungry."

"What are you in the mood for, Laura?"

"Mummy, Robbie, hurry up, I'm starving."

Laura placed her hand on Robbie's chest, smiling at the interruption. "We can't argue with that."

He covered her hand, smiling tenderly, "No, we can't."

They walked, together, down the steps. Robbie held open the gate, allowing Laura and Matty to walk through. He joined them on the sidewalk surprised when Matty took Laura's hand then reached back for his. Together they walked down the street. It was the image Robbie had seen in his dreams so many times.

 **Author's Note: I had originally written this as the LAST chapter. With the three of them walking into the sunset together. However, a few chapters grew and new ideas occurred. So you get a few more chapters. 5 more to be precise.**


	46. Chapter 46

**Chapter 46**

They returned to Laura's house holding hands, Matty skipping along ahead of them. A heady tension had been building between them throughout dinner. Squeezing her hand, Robbie decided to address the issue. "Laura, I can drive home tonight. If you'd prefer?"

Returning the squeeze, she shook her head. "No, Matty wants you to stay."

"And what do you want?"

"I've already told you what I want."

He laughed, "Yes, but then you mentioned something about a spare bedroom."

"I don't want to rush you, Robbie. You've done so well."

"So the spare room it is." He saw her duck her head, "It's alright, Laura. I don't think waiting another month will kill either of us."

She laughed, "Probably not, but it's not going to be easy either."

They walked in silence the rest of the way. Laura unlocked the door and Matty ducked under her, grabbing for Robbie's bag. "I want to carry it upstairs."

Robbie hurried after him, "Easy, lad, it's heavy."

Matty was struggling with the bag, "What makes it so heavy?"

"Presents."

Matty dropped the bag, his eyes as big as saucers, "For me?"

Robbie picked up the bag and nodded, "And your mum."

"Can I have them now?"

Laura closed the door behind them, "Only after you've taken your bath and brushed your teeth." He gave her a pouty look, "Or you can wait until morning."

"No, ma'am." He turned and ran up the stairs, leaving the bag.

She raised her eyebrow at Robbie, "Presents? Christmas is right around the corner."

"They are small things I thought he would like. I couldn't very well go away and not bring back souvenirs."

"You'll spoil him."

He took a step toward her, lifting her chin with his finger. "I have presents for you too."

A small smile played at her mouth. She bit on her lower lip, trying to hide it. "You'll spoil me."

Lowering his head, he brushed his lips gently across hers. "That's my plan."

She pushed up to him, capturing his lips, hungry for his touch. His hands grasped at her waist, pulling her against him. It was a needy kiss, borne of their attraction and frustration. Laura pulled away first, her head swimming with desire. She pulled away from him, resting her head on his chest, mumbling something Robbie couldn't understand.

Pressing a gentle kiss to the top of her head, "What did you say, Laura?"

She looked up at him, "Welcome home."

He chuckled, kissing the tip of her nose, "What happened to not rushing?"

"I meant for it to be a soft kiss, a welcoming kiss."

Moving one hand from her waist, he softly cupped her cheek, "I've never felt more welcome anywhere."

She inhaled deeply, desire ripping through her body. Closing her eyes, she took a step back, exhaling at the loss of contact. She pointed to the kitchen, "I have some things to do… I need to get Matty's lunch packed."

He smiled at her babbling, "I'll just take my bag upstairs. Which room should I take?"

Eyes still closed, she nodded, "Second door on the left."

Robbie laughed, the clear sound filling the entryway. Laura's eyes flew open, "The room next to Matty's? That's certainly one way to make sure nothing happens."

* * *

Robbie found her sitting in the kitchen an unfinished cup of tea in front of her. "Laura, I put Matty to bed. I told him you would come up in a minute. " She looked up, dazed. "Are you OK?"

She blinked, staring at him, "Are we really going to do this?"

Smiling, he crossed the room to her. Sitting in the chair next to her, he took her hand, "Only if you want to. You once said we didn't have to do this. That we could co-parent and not have a relationship. I know what I want but I don't want to force anything."

"What is it you want, Robbie?"

"You, plain and simple. However, you will have me." When she didn't say anything, he continued. "Lyn asked me if I was planning to marry you. I didn't have an answer at the time."

"And now?"

"I love you, Laura Hobson. I suspect I have for much longer than I care to admit. I would happily marry you but I realize that might not be something you are interested in. So my answer is I want you and Matty, any way you are comfortable. If you want me to be his father and your friend, I will accept it." He paused, making sure she was looking at him, "But I hope you want more."

"I do want more but I don't have the best track record with relationships."

He laughed softly, reaching to softly brush the tears from her face. "Well I don't know how good I am at casual relationships but I think I am pretty good at being a husband."

"Is that a proposal, Robbie Lewis?"

Leaning forward, he kissed her until she was slightly breathless, "No, Laura. When I propose, you'll know."


	47. Chapter 47

**Chapter 47**

Christmas Eve had finally arrived. The house would be overflowing. Michael and his girlfriend as well as James were staying over in order to be there for Christmas morning. Laura was in the kitchen busily prepping dinner for that evening when Matty and Robbie came in from the patio.

Their cheeks were both rosy from the cold. "Mummy, we need some hot cocoa."

She turned to him, smiling sternly, "And is that how we ask for something?"

Robbie helped his son off with his coat and smiled at Laura, "May we please have some hot cocoa to warm our cold bones?"

"Yes, mummy, please." She ruffled his hair, and he knew he was forgiven.

Robbie started taking his own jacket off, "And some of those small marshmallows would be nice too."

Laura gaped at him, "And is that how we ask?"

"Mummy, may we also have some marshmallows to go with our hot cocoa?"

She shook her head, "You're both impossible."

Matty looked up at her, "Yes, but you love us, so you don't mind."

Laura stared down at her son then back up to Robbie, "What makes you say that Matty?"

"You're my mum, you have to love me silly."

"But what makes you think I love Robbie."

He pulled out a chair and hopped into it, "I heard you talking to him last night. You told him you loved him and then you kissed him, on the mouth. Then he said it back and kissed you."

"And why were you awake, young man?"

"I had to go to the bathroom."

Laura sat in the chair next to Matty, "And how do you feel about it?"

"Feel about what?"

She rolled her eyes, astonished as always at his moments of insight followed by complete unawareness. "About me loving Robbie and him loving me?"

Matty shrugged, "It's OK, it's what mummies and daddies do." Laura turned back to Robbie who simply shrugged.

"What makes you say that?"

"Say what, mummy?"

"Mummies and daddies."

"I don't know, he just acts like a dad. He's actually a better dad than some of my friend's dads. And he's not really an uncle because he doesn't let me get away with things like Uncle Michael and Uncle James do." Matty looked at Robbie, "And you once told me that dad's usually follow mummy's rules."

"Would you want Robbie to be you dad?"

Matty nodded, "I already call him that with my friends. I only call him Robbie around you or my uncles."

Laura felt Robbie's hand on her shoulder, a gentle squeeze which filled her with strength. Covering it with hers, she smiled up at him. "Robbie, how would you feel about that?"

"It might be the best Christmas present I've ever gotten."

They stared at one another for a moment. Each knew, one day, they would have to have a deeper conversation with Matty but, for now, this was enough. "Mummy, are you going to make that hot cocoa? I'm still very cold."

Stifling a laugh, she leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Despite the cheeky way you asked, I will still make your cocoa." She stood, bumping into Robbie. "And I'll make some for your dad too."

Robbie smiled down at her, then kissed her cheek. He stepped back to let her pass before sitting in the chair next to Matty. The little boy looked up at Robbie, "Where are you going to sleep when Uncle James gets here?"

"What do you mean, lad?"

"You are sleeping in Uncle James' room. And Uncle Michael and Lisa will be in the other extra room. So where will you sleep?"

Laura froze in the kitchen. She really hadn't thought about the sleeping arrangements. She looked back at Robbie, panic filling her eyes. "Matty, what if you sleep with your mum and I will kip in your bed?"

Matty's laughter filled the kitchen, "That's silly, dad. You sleep with mummy and I will stay in my room. Besides you are way too big for my bed." He hopped down from his chair, "Mummy, is it OK if I go play until the cocoa is ready?"

She nodded, "Sure. I'll call you when it's ready."

Both adults watched Matty run off. Once they were sure he was out of earshot Robbie turned to Laura, "Don't worry. I'll sleep on the sofa."

Laura shook her head, "No, it's OK. We are adults, we can sleep in the same bed."

Robbie stood, walking towards her, backing her into a corner of the kitchen. He placed one hand on either side of her, pinning her to the cabinets. He saw her breathing hitch, a slight flush appear on her cheeks. Lowering his head, he placed a gentle kiss on her neck.

As she arched into his touch and wrapped her arms around his waist, he laughed. "What was that about being adults, Dr. Hobson?"

Pushing against him, fighting a smile, "Not fair, Robbie. We can do this. It's a big bed, you will stay on your side and I will stay on mine."

He pulled her to him, her body flush against his. Lowering his head, he let his lips brush against hers before whispering, "You keep telling yourself that, Laura." He let her go, smiling to himself as she gasped at the broken contact. Turning he walked away, "I'll be playing with our son, call us when the cocoa is ready."


	48. Chapter 48

**Chapter 48**

Everyone was finally in bed. Laura and Robbie were in her room, getting ready for bed. Robbie sat nervously in a chair waiting for his turn in the bathroom. He could hear water running. His mind wandered, imagining her in the shower.

As the water stopped he shook his head, trying to shake the images from his mind. The door opened and she walked into the bedroom. She was wrapped securely in her dressing gown, the sash knotted tightly. Her face was free of makeup, her hair slightly tousled.

Smiling at him, she moved from the doorway, "It's all yours." He stood, picking up his things. He was almost through the door when she asked, "Which side of the bed do you prefer?"

He laughed, "I'm easy. I'll take whichever side you don't want."

She stared at the closed door. How was she supposed to tell him she slept in the middle of the bed? Hearing the water start, she moved to the bed, taking off the extra pillows and turning down the covers. At the foot of the bed, she paused, trying to decide which side she should take.

Hearing the water turn off, she hastily chose the left side. Taking her dressing gown off, she slid under the covers pulling them up just as Robbie opened the door from the bathroom. She smiled up at him nervously, "I hope you don't mind."

He shook his head, amused by her nervousness, "I told you, I'm easy." Rounding the bed, he pulled back the covers and slid into the bed next to her. He rolled onto his side, facing her, propping his head on his hand. "You could have at least warmed the covers for me."

Remaining on her back, staring at the ceiling, she shook her head. "No, our agreement was, you stay on your side, I'll stay on mine."

"And do you really think you have that kind of control once you are asleep?"

"If I need to, yes."

"What are you scared of, Laura?"

She turned her head to him, "Why do you think I'm scared?"

"You're way over there, covered up to your eyeballs, wearing what is without a doubt the most modest set of pajamas I have ever seen."

"How do you know this isn't what I always sleep in?"

"I've seen you in your pajamas before, Laura."

She thought back to that night, "I didn't wear…"

He softly touched her cheek, "Not that night, Laura. After your friend was killed, remember." A moment of fear darkened her face, she nodded. Robbie cursed himself for even mentioning it. "I shouldn't have brought it up, not here, not now."

"It's OK."

Desperate to lighten the mood, "So did you buy these special?"

She laughed, turning toward him, "I always buy new pajamas for Christmas."

"And are they always this…"

Raising an eyebrow at him, "This what?"

"Chaste?"

"What would you have me wear in front of our son, your best friend and my brother?"

He laughed, remembering they weren't alone in the house, "Point taken. And here I thought they were just for me."

"You're not that irresistible, Robbie Lewis."

"On a scale of 1-10, where would I fit?"

"When you're being a cocky sod, a 2."

"And when I am not being a cocky sod?"

"Slightly higher."

He knew she was joking but could still sense a hesitance about her. "Laura, what are you scared of?"

"You." Seeing his look, she reached for him, "Us, this. I haven't, since…"

Understanding dawned, "I haven't either and before that night, I hadn't since before Val died."

"I want you, Robbie. But I don't want our first time to be a quick fumble while everyone we love and care for is down the hall."

"For clarification, it's not our first time. But your point is taken. Although, I need to mention we will occasionally do this with Matty just down the hall."

She laughed, pushing at him, "I know that but…"

"You want the first time to be special."

She nodded, "I know, it's silly."

Leaning forward, he kissed her softly, "Not at all. After the holidays are done what if we have Matty stay with your brother or Ellen for the night and we have a nice night out? Dinner, a play, a real date."

"You don't think I'm being ridiculous?"

"No." He lifted his arm, patting his chest for her to rest her head there. "Now, we need to get some rest. As I recall, morning will come awfully early."

She hesitated for just a moment before laying her head on his chest. His arm wrapped around her as her arm slid across his waist. Within minutes, they both were fast asleep.

* * *

Laura was the first to wake. She could feel Robbie curled around her, holding her lightly at her waist. A delicate smile played across her lips. Moving as gently as possibly, she attempted to get out of bed.

Robbie's arm tightened around her waist, pulling her back to him, "Where do you think you are going?"

"To the bathroom, then to check on Matty."

Nuzzling at her neck, "Neither of those is an urgent need. Stay here, for just a few minutes."

Deciding he was right, she relaxed into his embrace, tilting her head to give him better access. "Remember what we talked about last night."

Moving his hand under her pajama shirt, he stroked the smooth, warm skin of her stomach, "I remember, just want a small cuddle."

Turning in his arms, she slid her leg between his, "This doesn't feel like the beginnings of a small cuddle."

Still nuzzling at her neck, he smiled, "Is it my fault you are irresistible?"

She moaned as his teeth grazed her collarbone. Her hands wound into his hair, pulling on him. "We can't do this…" Seeing the look in his eye, she captured his lips, lost to the need and desire.

He pushed on her, rolling her onto her back then covering her with his body. The kiss continued, his leg slid between hers, rubbing against her center. She moaned into his mouth, pulling at his shirt, desperate to touch bare skin.

Lost to the moment, to the glorious feeling awakening in her body, she almost missed the slight creak of a door opening. It registered at the last minute and she pushed on Robbie, hard enough to get his attention.

He stared down at her, not sure why she was stopping him when he felt a small body land on the bed. "Happy Christmas, mummy and daddy. Can we please open presents now?"

* * *

Christmas had gone beautifully. Despite their near miss, Laura and Robbie had been able to enjoy the day. There had been a few lingering touches, as well as a few kisses. None of it was missed by the adults. Nor did the other adults miss the change in Matty calling Robbie dad.

No one questioned the changes. They all accepted them as a family, felt it was the way it had always been meant to be. Over the coming weeks, each of the adults would have a conversation with Laura. They would each be assured she was happy. James would tease Robbie only to back down when he saw the depth of emotion.

Everyone had retired early, exhausted from a day of good food and better company. Laura was just returning to her room as Robbie was exiting the bathroom. "I don't suppose you plan on warming up my side of the bed."

He laughed, "Actually, I am debating sleeping on the sofa."

Concern crossed her face, "Why?"

He cocked an eyebrow at her, "Really? You know as well as I do if Matty hadn't interrupted us this morning, more than an innocent cuddle would have happened."

She looked down, a rush of desire flooded her. "I know. What will everyone else think if you suddenly sleep downstairs?"

Walking to her, he took her hand, "Easy, I will tell them you snore."

"Robbie Lewis, you will do no such thing." He smiled at her, pleased with how easily he had riled her. "We can do this, you stay on your side; I'll stay on mine. Our mistake was starting out cuddled up."

"Is that your professional, medical opinion, Dr. Hobson?"

"Yes, it is." She moved past him, taking pillows from the bed and turning down the covers. "I'll take the left side again and you can stay to the right."

"It means I won't be available to warm your bedcovers."

"I'm tough, I'll warm my own covers."

He watched her, standing slightly taller, pretending this wasn't going to be an issue. "Then I will defer to your expert opinion." Nodding toward the bathroom, "Why don't you go ahead and get ready. I'll climb into bed. Who knows, if you are lucky, I might even be asleep before your return."

"As long as it's on your side of the bed that might not be a bad plan." She walked past him and entered the bathroom, closing the door behind her.

The minute he heard the water start, he started moving. He pulled the box from under his side of the bed and placed it gently on her pillow. He turned off all of the lights except for the lamp on his nightstand. Finally, he slipped between the sheets and waited.

It didn't take long before she was back. She had on the same pajamas from the night before but no dressing gown. He was happy to see her more relaxed despite their conversation, "You missed a present, Laura."

Looking at him skeptically, "Please tell me it's not a puppy."

He laughed "No, I decided to hold the puppy until his birthday." He nodded at the thin, flat box on her pillow. "This one is all about you and me."

She climbed onto the bed, sitting cross-legged facing him. Lifting the box, she was surprised by how light it was, "Are you going to give me any clues?"

He shook his head, "Not a single one."

She slid the bow off the box then lifted the lid. Inside was a sheaf of folded papers. Lifting them from the box, she looked at Robbie curiously. He lay back on the bed, arms behind his head. She unfolded the papers and started to read. It only took her a moment to realize what the papers were. Dropping them into her lap, she wiped away a tear, "Are you serious?"

He nodded, "I am. You say the word and I will sign them and give them to Innocent on Wednesday."

Pushing the papers and the box to the side, she launched herself on top of him. It was a searing kiss. Robbie hesitated for a moment then pulled her even more tightly to him. His hands slid beneath her pajama top, caressing bare skin.

Knowing if this went on for much longer there would be no stopping, he pushed at her sides, creating a small separation between them. "Laura, we can't. We shouldn't" Her eyes were lust-filled, needy. It took everything in him not to give in but he knew she would regret it, "It's OK, I'm not going anywhere." Slowly her breathing slowed. Her body relaxed and she allowed him to curl her into his side. Kissing the top of her head, he whispered, "So is that a yes?"

Lifting her head, to gaze up at him, she smiled, "On one condition." He nodded for her to continue, "Will you marry me?"


	49. Chapter 49

**Chapter 49**

He blinked, stunned by her words. "Are you serious?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Traditionally, the man does the asking."

She shrugged, "Because we have done everything traditionally."

"I know I've mentioned it but don't feel you have to do this."

"I want to do this, Robbie. If I'm honest, I've wanted this for a long time."

"When?"

"When what?"

"When do you want to get married?"

She smiled, "Is that a yes, Mr. Lewis."

"Does this make me Mr. Hobson?"

Pushing up, she brushed her lips against his, "Not until I get an answer, Mr. Lewis."

Pulling her even more tightly to him, he whispered, "Yes."

* * *

Somehow, they made it through the night keeping true to their promise from the night before. Partially because they wanted to make their first night together special and partially because they were both exhausted.

They knew there was a lifetime to be together. The next morning they went about their day. Said goodbye to their guests and kept their small secret to themselves. In the coming weeks, Robbie would tell his children, Laura would tell her brother and together they would tell James and Matty.

No one seemed very surprised by their news. They were all happy for the couple but not surprised. What surprised everyone was their decision not to have a wedding. They were absolutely positive they only wanted a quick trip to the registrar's office. They were even more resolute about no one needing to be there. To appease everyone, they'd promised a party during the late summer when Patrick, Kate and the new baby could come.

In their minds, the ceremony was almost unnecessary. They had made their promises to one another, the rest was merely paperwork.

* * *

Laura looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was curled, make-up slightly heavier than normal. She applied a thin layer of lipstick then smiled at the results.

The ringing doorbell pulled her from her reflection. Grabbing her purse she made her way downstairs just as Robbie was letting himself inside. At the sight of her, he stopped, "You are beautiful."

"Flattery will get you everywhere Mr. Lewis." Reaching out she straightened his tie, "You don't look so bad yourself."

"Had I known how gorgeous you were going to be I might have spent a bit more time getting ready."

"Are you ready?"

He nodded, "I am. Are you sure this is what you want?"

"More than anything." She took his hand, "Let's go, we wouldn't want to be late."

They made their way out of the house to Robbie's car. A short drive later they arrived at their destination. As Robbie helped her from the car, he leaned in, "We don't have to do this today."

She smiled up at him, "Are you getting cold feet?"

Pressing her into the car, he leaned down and whispered, "There are no cold parts of me, Laura. But I don't want to rob you of a special day."

"You are not robbing me of anything. We will have our special day when our entire family is together. But I don't want to wait that long to be your wife."

Taking her hand, "Then let's see a man about a ceremony."

Inside the building, they filled out the final paperwork and waited their turn. As they were given leave to enter the room, they only had eyes for one another. Robbie opened the door and Laura walked through, turning to smile at him. His eyes went wide with shock causing her to turn back to the room.

Inside the room, waiting for them were almost all of the people they loved. Michael, James, Lyn, her partner Tim, Ellen and in a tiny suit, Matty.

Matty ran to his mother holding a beautiful bouquet. Lyn walked to her father holding a matching boutonniere. Robbie looked down at his daughter as she pinned to the flower to his lapel, "How?"

"You didn't really think your detective best friend was going to let this go, did you?"

He looked over to James, who was smiling for all he was worth, "It's not all down to me. Ellen made friends with Laura's admin and she helped us."

Ellen came over to hug her friend, "We knew you didn't want any big do, but having a few witnesses who love you isn't quite the same."

"I expect you think I'm going to ask you to be my maid of honor."

Ellen laughed, "I'll happily accept bridesmaid. I think Lyn deserves the honor."

Laura turned to Lyn, "Would you do me the honor?"

Lyn smiled, nodding, "Yes."

Robbie smiled at his daughter and soon to be wife, "James, since you planned all of this, I guess that makes you best man."

"I'd be honored, sir."

Robbie rolled his eyes, "Laura, will Michael be giving you away?"

James shook his head, "He will have to be a groomsmen. We can't have an unbalanced bridal party."

Laura laughed at his odd primness, "So who will give me away?"

A small tug at her dress made her look down, "Mummy, can I do it?"

Kneeling she hugged him to her, "I think that's the best idea of the day."

A throat being cleared behind them drew everyone's attention, "I don't mean to be difficult, but I do have a schedule to keep."

James turned to the man, "Of course, let's get this started. It's taken them long enough to get here."

Everyone took their places. Matty walked his mother down the small aisle placing her hand into Robbie's the way his Uncle James and Aunt Ellen had shown him. Then he went to stand in front of Lyn, smiling when she squeezed his shoulder.

As everyone settled, James cursed lightly. "Hold on, I almost forgot." He pulled his phone from his pocket and pressed a button. The gathered assembly could hear a tinny ringing then suddenly Patrick and Kate appeared on the small screen.

"Hey dad, hey Laura, we didn't want to miss anything."

* * *

The bridal party made their way to a favorite pub where a table awaited them. Robbie and Laura were stunned at the planning and thoughtfulness of their family. As the night went on, they were amazed at all of the things James and Ellen had done to arrange for them to be there.

Robbie sat at the table, in awe of how easily this small group of people had come to mean the world to him. Laura leaned into him, knowing what was on his mind from the look on his face. She kissed him lightly on the neck then whispered to him, "I guess we will have to postpone our plans for the night."

He looked down at her, a small laugh escaping, "I guess so. Looks like we are going to have a houseful."

"I suspect they didn't know."

"I should hope not. I certainly haven't shared anything."

"Another night."

Pulling her close, "Very soon."

"What are you two whispering about over there?" James interrupted their conversation.

Robbie smiled then took a sip of his water, "Just happy about having a full house tonight."

Michael looked at Ellen nodding, "What makes you think that?"

Laura laughed, "Well you and James certainly aren't driving home after all you've had to drink. And it's not like Lyn and Tim can make it back to Manchester tonight."

Ellen pulled an envelope from her bag and handed it to Laura, "Well your house might be full tonight but you won't be in it."

Taking the envelope, Laura looked at her questioningly, "What?"

"Open it."

Laura opened the envelope to find two small plastic cards, "I don't understand."

Michael intervened, "A hotel suite, overlooking the Thames. Booked for the entire weekend. We will take care of Matty while you enjoy a small honeymoon."

Robbie shook his head, "We can't accept this."

James reached over snatching the envelope from Laura, "Told you. Suite's mine."

Laura pulled it back from him, "Not so fast."

Everyone laughed as Laura turned to Robbie, pulled him to her and kissed him deeply. Lyn reached around Matty and covered his eyes. He looked up at her, "They do this all of the time, you get used to it."

As Laura pulled back, she grinned at Robbie, "How do you feel about the suite now?"

"You don't play fair, Mrs. Lewis. But we don't have anything…"

James, mock-whispered, "I think you will find Ellen and I have seen to all of your needs for the weekend, sir."

Ellen smiled, "Two expertly packed bags await you in the room. What do you have to lose?"

Looking at Laura, Robbie shrugged, "It seems we have no choice."

* * *

Lyn took her father's car and drove everyone back to Laura's house. Laura and Robbie walked arm in arm to their hotel.

In the elevator, he pulled her to him, kissing her head lightly. "I know this isn't quite what we planned."

She smiled up at him, "It was ever so much better."

Thrilled with her happiness he smiled, "And the evening is still young."

"Is it? I hadn't noticed."

The elevators opened and he pushed her backwards out of the elevator. Turning her in the hallway, he led her to their room. Wrapping his arms around her, he waited as she opened the door. Using his foot, he blocked the door open then lifted her easily.

She laughed with delight as he carried her over the threshold of the room. "Robbie, I think you are supposed to do this at our home, not our hotel suite."

Kissing her lightly, then more deeply, he lowered her to the floor. "Not to worry, Mrs. Lewis, I'll do it then too."

Her hands moved up his sides to his shoulders, pushing his jacket off, letting it drop to the floor. She started unbuttoning his shirt, thankful he'd taken off his tie earlier. Finding bare skin, she traced her tongue over it, reveling in the taste of him. His strangled moan filled her with desire.

She gasped when he pushed her away. Glaring up at him, "Laura, keep that up and I'm going to throw you on the floor and this is going to be over very quickly."

Backing away from him, towards the bedroom she unzipped her dress. "Is that so, Mr. Lewis?"

She let the dress slide down her arms, falling to the floor. "Yes, that is so."

"Then perhaps we should go to the bedroom. I have new pajamas."

Stalking after her, "I don't think you will need pajamas."

"Why don't you at least see them before you pass judgment?" Turning Laura spotted her bag and grabbed it before heading to the bedroom.

"Where are you going?"

Smiling over her shoulder, "To change into my pajamas, of course."

"Laura, really it's unnecessary."

She laughed, waving over her shoulder. "Why don't you see what's in the gift basket? I won't be a minute."

Robbie groaned as the bathroom door closed. He finished unbuttoning his shirt and took it off. His trousers followed and both were slung over the nearest chair. Digging into the basket, he couldn't help but laugh as he pulled out a rather large box at the center. As he opened the note, he laughed again, louder and more sustained.

He didn't hear the door open, "Robbie, I hope you aren't laughing at my pajamas."

He turned to her dropping both the box and the note. His mouth was suddenly dry. Laura was framed in the doorway wearing the sheerest white negligee he'd ever seen. While the color screamed innocence, the length and see through nature was anything but.

"Well there is nothing modest about that."

Walking smoothly across the room, "So do you feel better about me changing?"

"I think I need to thank Ellen for packing your bag."

Laura laughed, "Well I bought it. I don't know how she managed to sneak in and pack it without me knowing."

Fingering the material, he pulled her to him. "That's a mystery to solve another day. For now, let's simply concentrate on you."

Smiling as he kissed her neck, she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I thought this was to be a mutual experience."

"Oh it will be, but first I have some spoiling to do."

Her eyes slid closed, as she gave into the sensation. Pressing into him, she stepped on the box, "Ow, what's that?"

Robbie was sliding the strap to her negligee down her shoulder, "It's a wedding present."

She pulled away, looking at him curiously, "A wedding present."

Knowing she would never let it go, he bent over, picking up the box and the note. He handed them to her with an amused smile.

Holding the box in one hand, she shook her head. He nodded at the note and she read it. She exploded with laughter as she dropped the note and wrapped her arms around him. "I have no need for this gift, do you?"

Pushing her back toward the bed, he shook his head. "I'm willing to roll the dice." She tossed the box over his shoulder as she pulled him into the bed on top of her.

The box landed next to the note. Written in elegant script across the paper,

 _To make sure Matty doesn't acquire a little brother or sister._


	50. Chapter 50

**Chapter 50**

Kids were running all over the patio, a party in full swing. Adults were watching indulgently. It was almost time for presents then cake and ice cream.

Robbie was holding an infant in his arms, bobbing the little boy up and down. Laura watched him, marveling at how much their lives had changed in the space of a year. A small part of her wished he'd been there from the beginning but knew they had happened the way they should have.

Looking at her watch, she knew it was time and weaved her way through running children to his side. She wrapped her arm around his waist, kissing his back. Pushing up on her tiptoes, she whispered, "It's almost time for presents."

He turned slightly, wrapping an arm around her then kissing her on the head. "Will you take Jack?" She nodded, taking Jack from him. "If you get them all together, I'll bring it out."

She smiled, leaning up to give him a quick kiss. He jogged away from her and she could see how giddy he was. Shaking her head, she placed a gentle kiss on Jack's head. A hand on her shoulder made her turn.

"I'll take him, Laura. I gather since dad ran off, it's present time."

Placing one last kiss on Jack's head, she nodded before handing him to Lyn. "Yes, I need to gather everyone together."

Laura called to the children, getting them settled so Matty could open his gifts. He dove through the presents, opening them to ooh's and ahh's from the other children. Finally as he was opening the last one, Laura looked up trying to get Robbie's attention.

He wasn't where she expected him to be. She looked around, frantically, finally spotting him in the kitchen on his mobile. Not understanding what he was doing, she stood to go get him when she heard James voice.

"Matty, I think you might have forgotten one present."

Matty jumped up, remembering the present in his mum's office the prior year. "Is it in mummy's office?"

James walked through the side gate holding a large box, "No, it's right here. You're dad asked me to bring it in."

Laura looked at him questioningly as he sat the box on the ground in front of Matty. She hissed at James, "Why isn't he here?" James smiled, waving her off, trying to tell her not to worry. "Matty, why don't we wait until dad comes outside?"

A disappointed Matty was just about to argue when he heard his father's voice. Beaming ear to ear, Robbie walked onto the patio, "Go ahead and open it, son."

Matty lifted the lid on the box and a small yellow head popped up. The little boy along with all of the other children squealed with delight. Matty reached into the box, touching the soft fur of the yellow Labrador. The puppy licked his hand causing Matty to giggle.

Robbie knelt beside his son, "Sorry, we didn't talk to your mum together."

Smiling at his father, "It's OK. What's his name?"

"Well she's a girl and you get to choose the name."

Matty made a face, "Why a girl?"

"Your mum insisted on a girl so she wouldn't be outnumbered."

Matty rolled his eyes, "Girls." Petting the small dog on her head, "Can I take her out of the box?"

Robbie lifted the dog from the box then placed her ground. She looked around, slightly frightened by the crowd. Finally, she stepped towards Matty and crawled into his lap. He hugged her to him as his friends crowded around desperate to pet her.

Laura picked her way through the children touching Robbie lightly on the shoulder, "I thought you were bringing the box in."

He smiled down at her, "Patrick called. Looks like we have another June 9th birthday in the family."

Laura covered her mouth, smiling under her hand. "Is Kate OK? The baby?"

He pulled her to him, "Both doing beautifully. A boy, William Robert. He's named after his grandfathers."

She hugged him, pulling him down for a tender kiss. "Happy birthday, grandpa."

Robbie wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer for a slightly more passionate kiss, "Thank you, grandma."

 **Insert Line**

Robbie opened the door to their bedroom to find Laura already in bed and almost asleep. Creeping quietly to the side of the bed, he leaned over to kiss her. Her eyes fluttered open, "Is Matty asleep?"

Sitting next to her he smiled, "Matty is asleep, the puppy is in her kennel, all is right with the world." Stroking the hair from her forehead, he looked at her with concern, "It's unlike you to be in bed this early. Are you OK?"

She nodded, trying to fight a yawn, "Just a long day. Why don't you get ready for bed? Then you can see if you can keep me awake."

Laughing, he leaned over and kissed her head. "Why don't you go to sleep and one of the many times I will get up with the puppy I will see if I can keep you awake?"

She pulled him down, kissing him with a hint of promise, "No, I'll stay awake. I promise." Looking up at him she smiled innocently, "Besides, you have one last present to unwrap."

Looking down at her modest pajamas, he laughed, "Really with everyone we care about just down the hall?"

"A wise man once told me we would occasionally do this with them down the hall." Robbie laughed somewhat proud she was parroting his words. She sat up, whispering into his ear, "Of course, that same man insisted on a puppy so he might not be too smart."

Robbie wrapped his arms around her, squeezing her to him, "I love you, Laura."

Nuzzling into his neck, she smiled, "I love you. Now go get ready for bed."

Reluctantly, he pulled away. She watched him go, listened for the water starting before reaching into her nightstand and pulling out a slender box. She placed it on his pillow then lay back and waited.

Robbie came out of the bathroom, "Pet, why don't you sleep in in the morning? I'll wrangle the troops and serve you breakfast…"

He quieted immediately as he saw her fast asleep on the bed. Turning out the remainder of the lights, he made his way quietly to his side of the bed. As he moved to turn down his covers he saw the slender box at rest on his pillow.

Sitting gently, he turned on the lamp on his side of the bed. The box was light. He shook it slightly and could feel something moving around but couldn't tell the contents. For a brief moment he considered not opening it, just leaving it till the morning.

But it was his birthday and she had said it was his last birthday present. Finally, his curiosity got the better of him and he slipped the bow from around the box and lifted the lid. A thin layer of tissue covered something in the center of the box.

Carefully peeling back the tissue he stared at the items nestled in the box, trying to understand their meaning. He lifted them from the box, letting them spin in his hand. Looking down at her sleeping form, the last few weeks played through his mind. He thought back to the night of their wedding and his words as she pulled him onto the bed.

Closing his hands around the dice, he smiled to himself. He turned out the lamp, slipped fully under the covers and turned to her. She rolled onto her side, away from him as he did. Settling as gently as he could behind her, he pulled her to him, sighing as she curled into him.

His hand gently came to rest over her stomach. A tear slipped quietly down his cheek when he felt her hand cover his. All of those long ago dreams of Laura he suddenly knew had come true. Only, unlike in his dreams, he was the man beside her. With a smile on his face, he drifted off to sleep. A sleep filled with thoughts of a happy life spent together.

 **Author's Note: This brings us to the end of our tale. I need to give thanks to** ** _MurphyCat_** **for the idea. Of course, she wanted a Robson baby and I gave her a Robson toddler with the promise of a baby at the end. As I was writing her a long email to explain why I would never write that story this story came to mind. I hope she will forgive me for not really fully honoring her request.**

 **This story has been an absolute joy to write. In prior stories I have generally stuck to the shows, finding little seams in them where I felt there needed to be some extrapolation. I love these characters so and hope you feel it when I write about them.**

 **Thanks to each and every one of you who reviewed, even those who didn't particularly like my story or my characterization. I genuinely appreciate them and I enjoy chatting back and forth with reviewers who are signed in. Writing for me is a pleasure, something I do to relax. Communicating with you, brings me great joy as well. Thanks for being such a tremendous fandom. I want to assure you, I never start a story without knowing EXACTLY where it is going. Generally I have the last chapter written when I start the story. So have a little faith, I promise to get us to a happy place (even if I might make you suffer a bit along the way).**

 **PS**

 **I will be publishing a 49A as a separate piece in the near future. It's what happened on the honeymoon. You didn't really think I wouldn't write an M piece did you?**

 **PPS**

 **If you are not reading Screenwriter's piece you need to be. Also anything by Muffinzelda should be at the top of your reading list as well. And finally, a shout out to JackDawsInFlight. She has been silent of late but her stories are pure poetry. Check them out and give her a big shout out.**

 **PPPS**

 **Despite writing a Robson baby story (which I swore I would never write). Here is a few promises I will never write, so no need to ask. James/Jean pairing - not gonna happen, EVER. I see them as great friends and partners in crime but not a couple. James/Robbie pairing - NO, NO, NO. I have nothing against male relationships but that is one I never see as anything other than a father/son relationship. There are other good writers who cover it but I am not one of them. Beyond that, if you have any ideas, throw them out there. You just never know.**


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